His grades were below C level.
a son of a beach
He Helium
Now I can’t help but wonder if Annie really is ok.
During the story of the defeat of Cronus, I paused the movie and said "Do you know how to get rid of Tartarus?"
"You go to the dentistus."
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
That was the punchline
He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.
Attire
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."
The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.
"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."
Really big hands
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The direction the first letter faces
Because 10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too..
Edit: thank you for awards, I have never gotten one before. I apologize that this is a repost, I did see it on TikTok and thought that it was cute and wanted to share. In the future I will check the sub for similar content before I post anything.
Black eyed peas can sing us a song and chickpeas can only hummus one.
But Bill kept the Windows
You don't stop till you get enough
Bug me in ways I cannot put into words.
"Ammonia cleaner." She replied. I said, "Sorry, I thought you worked here."
A Shamonarch, if you will.
He's bad
Bob
Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.
It can write other things too.
It was an apple with very limited memory, just one byte and everything crashed.
Bi-yourself.
That's when I realised I was playing the Bee side.
the vaccum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years...
These zoo meetings are really taking off.
"Because you're the largest re-tailer in the world!"
He said, “Wow, that’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.”
The bartender says, “pal, if you want punch, you’ll need to get in line.”
The guy looks around and there is no punch line.
The man replies " It's A knicknack, patty whack, give the frog a loan, his old mans a rolling stone (also I meant Mick jagger my autocorrect sucks balls)
One's meaty, the other's a little meteor
I'm carrying a torch for her.
They’re both Paris sites
I said that’s impossible, Labor Day is in September!
(New dad of a 3 week old, trying to step into my new role)
Ass skin for a friend
don't know their ass from a hole in the ground
After I thanked him, he said to me: "Don't vorry, just dry him off and keep him varm, he vill be fine"
I asked him, "Are you a vet?"
He answered, "Am I vet? I'm soaking"
"Can't turn that down."
Now I can't even read the thing!
G : what type of apples grow on trees ?
my dumbass : idk red and green ?
G : all of them do
wheezes
A bird can still tweet.
Attire.
Because 10+10 is 20 and 11+11 is 20 too
