P = Np Puns

Bearritos.

This was stolen from the NPS Instagram, which you should follow for this and other (real) amazing National Parks facts.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CGciQLIDOFS/

I was hiking in Olympic NP last year and we took a break. Soaking in the scenery and she was feeling philosophical; she said that 'it must be lonely to be a tree, you just stay in one place forever'. I let that hang in the air for a bit then replied, 'No, eventually you would leave'. She nearly choked on her water.

Last night, I tried to tell my 10 year old daughter the classic "Kangaroo walks into a bar" joke. For those who are not familiar, a version of this. I got to the point where the Kangaroo orders the first beer, and my daughter interrupted me with "let me guess - the beer wasn't hoppy enough." Nope. But I like the way she thinks!

NP Arrrrrrrrr

Pure dad joke.

I love these http://imgur.com/gallery/NpJs8

Found on this ELI5, /u/TopRamen247 proofs to be capable to be a dad.

I received a text after helping a friend out today...

FRIEND: "Thanks for being here for me today."

ME: "Np, I had trouble getting there so I just removed the 'T' "

I also stole and butchered this joke from a comedian but she laughed anyway.

http://np.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/2kxj73/what_is_carpool_tunnel_syndrome_how_do_i_avoid_it/

http://np.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2f8c1r/eli5_why_are_deer_extremely_sensitive_to_even_the/ck6wa5c

> johnmal85

> Is there a subreddit with pictures of stuff in lava or hardened like this?

> > memorizemee

>> I'd try r/lava, but its pretty much dead.

> > > confluencer

> > > So are you telling me that /r/lava has cooled down?

> > > > memorizemee

> > > > God damn it...

Sauce: http://np.reddit.com/r/bitchimabus/comments/2ctipf/bitch_i_have_been_consumed_by_molten_rock/cjiwrjy

Bearritos.

This was stolen from the NPS Instagram, which you should follow for this and other (real) amazing National Parks facts.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CGciQLIDOFS/

NP ARRRRHH!!!!!