Obituary for the Pillsbury Dough Boy, Pop N Fresh

The Pillsbury Doughboy, remembered best as "Pop N Serve", and/or "Pop N Fresh", died yesterday of a severe yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy will be buried in this lightly greased coffin.

Dozens of celebrities will turn out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.

The grave site is expected to be piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima will deliver the eulogy and lovingly describe Doughboy as "a man who never knew how much he was kneaded".

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.. He was considered a very smart cookie, but wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.

Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop tart.

The funeral will be held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eyes_and_teeth
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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Why did Winnie the Pooh quit his job writing obituaries?

He didn't like being the bear of bad news.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Feddny
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2018
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Great-Grandpa Rudolph's joke whenever he opened the obituary page in the paper

"Look at all these people who stopped smoking today!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/koalabeard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2014
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My mom remarked that the obituaries had had more people in them than usual.

My dad replied "well people are just dying to get in there"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chipch0p
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2015
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Dad Jokes in an obituary

From this posting over on /r/pics

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/201xze/in_honor_of_my_fantastic_grandfather_who_passed/

"How much does a Grecian Urn? Oh about 200 drachmas a week."

Nice to know even in death Dads and Grandads can still crack jokes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DamienJaxx
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2014
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(x-post from /r/pics) Dad Joke in Self-Written Obituary

http://i.imgur.com/TAQtabb.jpg

Check out the third column, first full paragraph.

Original post: http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/201xze/in_honor_of_my_fantastic_grandfather_who_passed/

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bugzzzz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2014
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One for the sunday morning newspaper

When you get to the obituaries pause and say "hmm" like you see something interesting.
Wife or kids will say "what?" and you say "they all died in alphabetical order!"
It gets better after the 5th or 20th time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nicknak2445
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
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The inventor of the Hula hoop passed away.

From his obituary, I learned he was quite famous in certain circles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_snipeypants
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
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How does a sassy lady tell someone they should shave?

Obituary

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TacoChild159
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
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Man chokes on hotdog and dies in Germany

His obituary said it was the wurst way to die.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kota78
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2018
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Dad at the breakfast table

Dad is sitting at breakfast table across from my brother and he grabs the newspaper. He turns it to a seemingly random page, looks up, and utters "Spencer, I see dead people". My brother goes to see the page. He turned it to the obituary section. Goddammit Dad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MasterExploder6
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2015
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