So I've been worried about this malicious software that locks my computer onto an online bowler's website...

But I guess I'm not the only one worried about the E-Bowler virus

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HumanAtlas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2014
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Upstairs, Downstairs: a dad's malicious compliance

I posted this over on r/MaliciousCompliance and was told that it might fit over here as well. > Wife: "I think I left my phone on the nightstand. Would you please run up the stairs for me, dear?"
> Me: "Sure, hon."
> I dash up the stairs, turn around at the top and come charging down the stairs again.
> Me: "Phew, that was fun. Good idea."
> Wife: "..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-SQB-
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2018
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What do you call a malicious program written by a feline?

Meowware.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Clbull
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2018
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I'm looking to make acquaintances with a person of great wickedness or maliciousness...

Asking for fiend.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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If you hear something, say something

I originally posted this in r/MaliciousCompliance, but several commenters thought it would be good here as well. I hope this isn't a re-run for too many of you.

This was years ago when my son was starting middle school. I was transporting him and a group of his new friends. One of the friends was French, and spoke French at home. My son mentioned that I had taken French in high school, and so one of his friends asked me to say something in French and see if French girl could understand me.

Before I go on, a note on parenting style: we joke around with our kids all the time. I know that not all parents joke with their children; some of my kids' friends enjoyed to a dad who makes a joke, and some would look at me like I grew a second head.

So I said to the French girl, Β«quelque choseΒ». Immediately the friends turned to French girl and asked "What did he say?"

I waited, wondering whether she would join my joke.

A sly smile crept across her face as she said, "he said...something". The rest of the trip, the friends tried to convince her to reveal what it was that I had said. Β«quelque choseΒ» is the French phrase for "something".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mermaldad
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Absolutely souper

The Chinese chef maliciously dumped a hot broth with dumplings on an obnoxious customer. It was a wanton soup attack....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
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I once farted in an Apple Store. They kicked me out because they didin't have Windows
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nikklovesreddit
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2019
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Atheism is a non-prophet organization
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πŸ‘€︎ u/albiedam
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
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What do you call a mean apple?

A red malicious.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drewp317
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2017
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