Success is 10% inspiration, 90% perspiration...

and 40% willingness to cheat.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DemiserofD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Picture of inspired air
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fill-Chapo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Inspired by an earlier post about bacteria
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gr8prajwalb
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I was asked to put either an inspirational quote or a joke on the message board at work.
πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thatdavidgeezer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum...

It was nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kliuch
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Oman! You’re about to read some terrible stuff.

β€œI live in Spain without the β€˜s’”.

This inspired me to come up with some truly terrible country-related jokes.

It’s about to Bahrain jokes without the β€œBah”.

  1. I have a double China without the β€œa”.

  2. Some people have told me that I look a lot like a German without the β€œan”.

  3. Oman, I think that one conspiracy about Israel Israel.

  4. You all probably want to hit me with Japan without the β€œJ”.

  5. You probably can’t Kuwait to stop reading these without the β€œKu”.

  6. Nowadays, car companies are focusing on making electric cars, but I Madagascar.

  7. As you’ve probably guessed, I don’t even have one Nepal without the β€œNe”.

All of these bad jokes made me Hungary so Iran to the nearest shop to get some food. Why am I always India-r need of food?

I sincerely apologise, fellow people. These jokes probably left a painful Denmark on your souls without the β€œDen”, of course.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/anipanreads
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
In my graphic design course, we all had to make typefaces inspired by our favorite US cities, and present them in class.

We all knew that at some point, we’d have to discuss the LA font in the room.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HuecoTanks
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for

Nobody has given me a straight answer

πŸ‘︎ 350
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Brootalz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
A sperm, a carpenter, and julius ceaser walk into a bar

He came, he saw, he conquered

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Brootalz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My Daughter told me yesterday that she was just thankful that I had inspired her to follow her dreams

Actually she just sits around, smokes weed all day and never calls me, but a Dad can dream.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jvanzandd
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
🚨︎ report
We are so happy to finally be rid of 2020

But next year will be 2022

(Inspired by the latest joke I read here by u/callingYouForMoney )

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Totorowl
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Inspiration from Mitch Hedberg
πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JamilliousThePaws
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when an artist has trouble finding inspiration ?

The draw a blank !

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Reddit in a nutshell
πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Demosthenes-42
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I feel like I am living in a Abbott and Costello inspired dream..

-WHO wants you to wash your hands.

-Who does?

-Yes

-Who wants me to wash may hands?

-Yes, WHO wants you to wash your hands and practice social distancing.

-I don't know who. My mom?

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jgpitre
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Robert Wadlow is such an inspiring individual

Everybody looked up to him

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad: "What inspired you to write this essay?"

Son: "The due date."

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sexxc
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Inspiring others
πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JukeboxSommelier
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
My grandpa always told me "when one door closes another one opens."

A lovely and inspiring man...makes shit cabinets though.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
inspiration < looking at things practically
πŸ‘︎ 911
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rud-Hi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
🚨︎ report
found this when looking for inspiration for a pun about praying prey.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarimBoyWonder
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2018
🚨︎ report
A sore neck was the inspiration for my wife and I to make up this joke together...

A man was telling his friend that his neck was sore. His friend asked him, β€œwhat happened”? The man said that varmints had been tearing up his yard and that he had been spending hours digging through the dirt trying to repair the damage. His friend says, β€œgo for massage and that should take care of the problem”.

A couple of days pass and the two meet up again. The friend asked the man, β€œhow did it go?” The man says, β€œwell, I have to tell you, they are hard to catch, but once you get ahold of them and get started, those gophers sure seem to like their massage”.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jdinmd
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I opened a place that sells Dad Joke inspired drinks...

...you could say they’re my SpecialTea.

πŸ‘︎ 71
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MattTheKat86
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Need a short Pun involving Dinosaurs and Space?

I just need a very short pun involving space and dinosaurs to go on the cover of an adventure book im writing for kids.

"A roarsome adventure" is too cliche and I'd like space to be featured somewhere. But there isn't a lot of room.

Thanks for any help, don't worry about them being dumb as a dumb pun could inspire a decent one :)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mikomiji
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I want to build a giant Robin Williams inspired house

I just hope I can afford the Morkage payment.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cheerfulsith
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
🚨︎ report
So why do you want to become a citizen of Switzerland?

I don't have any particular reason why, but the flag definetly is a big plus.

inspired from r/memes

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Andidaniel
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Ed Gein has been a huge inspiration for killers in movies. I don't get it.

He was honestly just Ed G.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Butterbrodui
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Saying the wealthy sit in their ivory towers is really just saying that the rich like Tuskeny-inspired architecture
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ilfiliri
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Mate of mine used a modified Fatman in a New Vegas inspired talbetop-RPG. We both found the damage calculation of the lingering damage the GM thought of quite punny:

"Type: Radioactive Fallout, 7d6"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoughShadow
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Why should you never argue with a knife?

Because it will always have a point

PS, this was inspired from a comment I saw on an instagram post, and also I apologize if this joke has already been posted as I did not take the time to check if it has been.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NightmareCliff
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
(Dad joke inspired from work today)

It's tradition to bring baked goods (typically doughnuts) after you get your security clearance. I never bothered to ask why. I just figured it was a nice thing to do. Then it hit me...

Doughnuts and bagels are granted on a knead-to-dough basis.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Good punmanship is an investment in your future
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mortilsola
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2020
🚨︎ report
How many f***s does a catholic sister give?

Nun.

[Inspired by Netflix - Warrior Nun]

πŸ‘︎ 145
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nLych
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the one about the ice cube’s great escape from the freezer?

You could say it was a well thawed out plan.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/livelylou4
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Amazing Life Hack!
πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clitoris-drowner
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Well.. I don't think there is many worse things to be inspired by
πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Athena123YT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Truly inspiring
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AbusiveBananaPeel
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I never expected the vintage movie I was watching to end with everyone doing a dance popular in the early 60s which is inspired by rock and roll.

It was a twist ending.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Doctor: I’m sorry but I had to remove a section of your colon.

Me;

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CodyClay1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Tell me ONE thing wrong with heavy tourism in Hawaii. Go on.

Isle weight.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KairuSmairukon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Oman! You’re about to read some terrible stuff.

β€œI live in Spain without the β€˜s’”.

This inspired me to come up with some truly terrible country-related jokes.

It’s about to Bahrain jokes without the β€œBah”.

  1. I have a double China without the β€œa”.

  2. Some people have told me that I look a lot like a German without the β€œan”.

  3. Oman, I think that one conspiracy about Israel Israel.

  4. You all probably want to hit me with Japan without the β€œJ”.

  5. You probably can’t Kuwait to stop reading these without the β€œKu”.

  6. Nowadays, car companies are focusing on making electric cars, but I Madagascar.

  7. As you’ve probably guessed, I don’t even have one Nepal without the β€œNe”.

All of these bad jokes made me Hungary so Iran to the nearest shop to get some food. Why am I always India-r need of food?

I sincerely apologise, fellow people. These jokes probably left a painful Denmark on your souls without the β€œDen”, of course.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/anipanreads
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when an artist has trouble finding inspiration?

She draws a blank.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TexSurfen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report

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