Inquisition Puns

"Sense us."

They got me every time

Because no one inspects the Spanish inquisition

 

(For those who don't Monty Python, explaination

because nobody expected you.

http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20140905.png

Source: Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Por qué pine.

I turn to her and say “I bet he don’t have the guts to do that again”

Edit: holy shit y’all this blew up. Thank you master dads. I feel worthy

1

I need to AXE you a question....

Hahaha, my husband is so proud of this joke. Came up with it all on his own.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

Warum warum

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

So I am going to start taking steps to avoid them.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

No one will expect the Spinach Inquisition

The lamp is then fastened by the sea, just so none of the townsfolk get into trouble. One day, an inquisitive young chap opens the lamp and the wizard starts wreaking havoc upon the town. All the scientists gather and decide to chemically dissolve the lamp. But all the chemicals they have fail to work. They try to burn it, melt it and what not but nothing works. Finally one scientist says “I know exactly what we should do. Pour excessive chemicals and try to dissolve it. I know we’ve tried it before but let’s give it another shot.” They bring in acids and other corrosives from the neighbouring cities and pour it on the lamp and it successfully dissolves and the wizard disappears. Everyone is amazed and asks the scientist “How did you know about the extra chemicals?” The bald, black scientist looks at them and says “Oh that’s easy. Moored urn problems require more darn solutions.”

I wasn't expecting the Spanish inquisition.

I honestly didn't expect so much Spanish Inquisition.

There was a loud noise from the dining room. I walk in to see my wife slumped over the table. She answers my inquisitive look with "I just clocked my knee."

"How fast was it going?"

i was sitting at a counter, eating my lunch, when this guy and his wife come in and start getting really inquisitive about the beer list. they finally order something. after they've had a few sips:

waiter: how's the beer? guy: i don't know, it has a "moorish" taste to it. waiter: ... wife: he means he's going to probably want "more" of it.

part of me wants to believe that this was a successful assist on her part, but then part of me thinks the guy probably feels robbed of the punchline!

There used to be two great punners. We were the best at what we did. And what we did was pun. There was me, a simple lad from a tiny backwater town and then there was him. A swarthy fellow from the land of the Armada, the Inquisition and the Conquistadors. A Spaniard he was, by both birth and spirit. We duelled relentlessly, always gaining ground only to see it slip away, a pun-of-war as it were. A seemingly eternal struggle for dominion. This endless struggle took its toll on both him and I, until I realized that it was time to stop. I chose to cede the mantle to him. And I will never go back to that life.

And so...

There will only be Juan.

I asked him what chemical it was.

"Caffeine" was his reply.

It was only polite to apologize for my inquisitiveness: It would have kept me up all night trying to work it out.

Por que pine

The Spanish Inquisition...

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!

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