My friend got fired at the fizzy drinks factory today.

He was soda pressed.

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👤︎ u/Exit202
📅︎ Dec 06 2020
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Why are bananas inconsiderate drivers?

They always peel out.

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👤︎ u/Blarghish
📅︎ Nov 05 2017
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A fish tale

A small mouth is swimming behind a large mouth and the large mouth inconsiderately poops in his face. The small mouth spat out and cried in disgust and ire, "bass turd!!"

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Sep 17 2020
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Dad Joked at Church

I was at my in laws this weekend, and for mother's day my MIL wanted us to go to church with her. I'm not religious, but fine, whatever you want. The problem is that neither my wife or I brought "church clothes," with us for the visit. It was unexpected.

So we're sitting in the church and my wife is talking to her dad.

"Dad, I'm just happy I have a pair of jeans that aren't all ripped up! I didn't plan on this at all!"

"Oh, hunny, don't worry. Any pair of pants would have been holy once you walked in."

Massive grin. Then back to serious, because Jesus, I guess.

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📅︎ May 12 2014
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