Ella Gilliam loved the first minutes of a new project the most. More than completing the project, more than the sale, more than the profit, or vanquishing the tortured souls and evil spirits, more than anything.
There was something for all the senses. The smell of mothballs, or blood, depending on how aggressive the haunting. The tang of anger or fear in the air, depending on if this house had heard of her or not. The sound of jangling chains, or more eclectic soundscapes, depending on how recent the ghosts cultural references were.
She set her huge Makita radio down in the hallway, and tuned it to her favourite local radio station, playing a mix of 90’s classics and inane chat. She knew that she could listen to it on her phone, or even just work in silence as she didn’t pay any attention. But something about that imposing block of a sound system grounded her. It made her forget how crazy the idea of a paranormal housing developer was, drowning out the voice of her mother.
“What are you blathering about? Like Extreme Makeover: Ghostbusters Edition? Ridiculous!”, her mother had said.
“Ridiculously profitable”, Ella said to herself, standing in her latest purchase. The prices were dirt cheap for these places at auction. No one wanted to live in the house with the bloodstains from the recent murder still on the walls, or where the last 3 residents went mad and jumped off the roof, or just disappeared. If you had the right combination of DIY building and DIY spirit wrangling there was ‘a killing to be made’, as she had been too restrained to put on her business cards.
With the radio in place, allowing her to act like this was any normal renovation, she got out the other tools of her trade and took a turn into the ectoplasmic side. The gear was a lot more high tech, but equally robustly built. She’d learnt that lesson the hard way. Sensitive equipment was no match for the dust and detritus on a building site, you had to go heavy on the cases and shock absorption.
The preliminary scans showed nothing too out of the ordinary. A couple of minor demonic incursions upstairs, barely cracking this plain of existence. A handful of level 2 poltergeists in the main living areas. She nodded in satisfaction at that finding. Once she had broken those spirits spirit they would really help speed up the painting that it was painfully clear the entire house would need.
She frowned as the rest of the scan came up clean. There was nothing here really. Not nearly enough
... keep reading on reddit ➡Actually, I'm not anymore. I lost my job when my daughter was born. Took a week paternity leave and was called at the end of it by my contractor to find that I had been laid off. I was not awarded any redundancy pay because I was sub-contracting.
I never went back to that profession and am now doing something completely different.
However, fuck those guys - I have plenty of stories to tell and if you are the tennant of a British council house or flat or even if you are not and just have questions, ask away. I am quite happy to spill every bean I have.
If proof is needed I can scan my CIS card which has my name and face but I will only do this to the mods as I don't really want to be incriminated for bean spilling by my former employers who were, frankly, a bunch of evil bastards.
EDIT 1: proof sent to mods.
EDIT 2: Just so nobody else need ask: a council house is British cheap housing owned and managed by a local authority (regional government) rented out to tennants who can't afford (or don't want) to rent or buy privately owned property. Council estates refers to large numbers of low rise council owned buildings in one area, used to house entire communities. A council block is a high rise of flats. The best widely familiar example of a high rise council flat I can think of is Del Boy's flat in Only Fools and Horses.
EDIT 3: I should probably point out that council flats/houses does not necessarily equal run down slums, ghettos of drug addled crazies or large swathes of criminal immigrants milking the system for all its worth. All this exists, of course, but there are an equal number of well maintained council properties and the vast majority of council tennants are regular, nice, law abiding citizens. The nature of my job (i.e. repairing void tennancies where damage has been caused or the tennant lived in such a horrible way that he left the property in a vile mess) means I wound up seeing the worst end of the spectrum, not the best. So the stories I have to tell reflect this. Just don't make the mistake of thinking they represent what is the absolute norm.
EDIT 4: I'm getting a lot of accusations of being American. I'm not sure why. Some people are saying I use American spelling. All I can guess is I'm using Chrome, which does the spell check thing as I type and if it pulls up an error I change it to the suggestion. All the suggestions appear to be American spellings. I am very British thankyou very much, but used to using a so
... keep reading on reddit ➡
Hello, I've just moved to Bristol and loving it here! I'm looking to have a few of our rooms painted and decorated. Grateful for any recommendations of professionals or companies you've used which are reasonably priced (we're near the harbour) x
He was overcome with emulsion.
He made a lovely job of the landing!
Verified? (This bot cannot verify AMAs just yet)
Date: 2012-11-29
Link to submission (Has self-text)
| Questions | Answers |
|---|---|
| What the hell is worse than finding brain matter sprayed about? | Plenty. |
| I found a dead cat in a cupboard once. It had been hanged, which for some reason disturbed me more than the brain matter. | |
| I think the way some people live disturbed me more than actual physical findings though. The state of some people's homes, where they live, sometimes 24 hours a day like prisoners in some self imposed cell. | |
| The creepiest instance was a flat in an area used primarily to house drug addicts. Hardcore heroin users who would sleep until mid-afternoon then emerge like zombies and queue around the local phone box to call their dealer. It's council policy to house drug addicts within easy reach of their dealer so they don't withdraw too often. | |
| This particular guy had died of an OD. His flat was high up and the flats around were empty, so he'd lived a really isolated existence in the clouds. He'd covered every inch (and I mean every inch - ceiling, cupboard doors inside and out, floor etc) in marker pen, writing down, apparently, every thought that came into his drug addled head. The things he wrote were not profane, but they were very very disturbing. | |
| What a cliffhanger - tell us what he wrote! | It was a long time ago. He was clearly a paranoid and believed demons were coming for him. He wrote about things he saw flying outside the window and a bunch of trippy poetry. The creepiest line, for some reason, was where he described lying on his bed waiting to die while the ghouls flew round and round the light bulb. |
| It's council policy to house drug addicts within easy reach of their dealer so they don't withdraw too often. | If your dealer lives in region A and you tell your housing rep that you are an addict and your dealer lives in region A, your rep will try to find you a house/flat in region A so that you can be close to your dealer. I was told this is so that the addict d |
Hi B&H!
I am moving from London to my first apartment that I have just bought in Hove! Really excited and can’t wait to move into the area. Before moving in I was going to paint the apartment myself to cut costs, but after talking to family they said it will take me way to long with all the prep work. It’s only a small 2 bed around 550 sq ft. I’m on a super tight budget as I still need to buy all my furniture and everything else! Does anyone here paint or decorate for a living or have local contacts? Much appreciate!!
I looking for recommendations on what to use when cleaning my exterior masonry walls before painting. I don't want to power hose for fear I damage anything. Looking for a cleaning solvent to spray on and rinse off to clean up the grime.
Just a simple wallpapering job but as it involves a mantle piece, I'd definitely cock it up. Would rather pay a professional and know it'll be done right. Has anyone got any personal recommendations (rather not just pluck a number from online, I'd prefer a proper recommendation).
He made a lovely job of the landing....
