I just found a whip, mask and some handcuffs in my sisters room.

I just had no idea she was a superhero.

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/VERBERD
šŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
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Harry Houdini was allergic to the metal they used to make handcuffs...

Every time they put a pair on him, he'd break out.

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/Somethinggood4
šŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
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Get the handcuffs, Officer
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šŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2018
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Why are handcuffs sometimes carried by foreign visitors?

Because they were designed for two wrists.

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/Sonicxwwe
šŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
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what kind of place handcuffs you while you eat?

ARRESTaurant!

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/HaddockMaster
šŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2018
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Always carry around handcuff keys, it can get you out of cardiac arrest
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šŸ‘¤︎ u/The_Untiled_One
šŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
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We had a bit of an awkward moment at home a while back...

My wife and I were doing a bit of roleplay in the bedroom. I had just handcuffed her to the bedhead when we heard one of the kids turning the door handle. I quickly threw the covers over the both of us and in walked my 7 year old son. He noticed the handcuffs, went really quiet and had this confused look on his face. After 15 seconds or so he asked my wife why she was handcuffed to the bed. She blushed and had to come up with a lie on the spot. She stammered out that daddy was just practicing with the handcuffs for his new job as a policeman and that my son should just go back into the lounge room and watch some TV.

A few weeks later I was asked to careers day at my son's school. My son stood up with me in front of the class and proudly announced his daddy was a policeman and that I lock up baddies. I didn't want to embarass him so I just played along. It turns out I was the one who was about to be embarassed. One of the kids asked if my son had ever seen me at work. My son said no but that he had seen me practicing using handcuffs on his mom. It went right over the kids heads but the teacher was very amused and couldn't stop giggling. I guess my wife and I would have been the hot topic in the staff room that day.

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/THPSROCKS
šŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
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Found out I was allergic to alcohol

Every time I drank I broke out in handcuffs

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/Gearman66
šŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
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My Dad works for a welding supplier, so heres his welding dad joke

A guy was cutting with an acetylene torch when suddenly there is a break in the line. The acetelyne starts shooting up his arm and a stray spark ignites it. His arm bursts into flame. He starts running around the shop waving his arm around while it's on fire until someone hits him with the fire extinguisher.

After the fire is out and the EMT's arrive, the police are there taking statements from the witnesses. When the officer finishes this, he pulls out his handcuffs, goes over to the burned guy on the ground, pushes the EMT out of the way, and arrests the burned guy.

When he brings the guy to the station, the chief asks him why he arrested this guy when he clearly needs medical attention. The officer responded by saying "He was waving a firearm in public"

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/The_Better_Devil
šŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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A police officer walks into a tattoo parlor

A police officer walks into a tattoo parlor, hoping to get something cool drawn onto his shoulder. He walks up to the artist and shows him a picture of what he wants. In large text on a ribbon it says, "Protect and Serve." Below it, is a picture of a a badge, a pair of handcuffs, and a pistol. The tattoo artist is very good at his job, and says he can get this done in one session, so the officer sits down and the artist gets started. A few hours later, the artist is just finishing up, inking the last details of his service weapon. Once the last line is inked on the trigger, the cop gets up from his chair and looks in the mirror to see his new tattoo. His face twists into a look of shock and terror, pulls out his gun and opens fire onto the tattoo artist, killing him in the process. He gets on his radio, calling for backup, and took a defensive position until a few more cops and the police chief showed to the parlor minutes later. The chief, while examining the scene asks the officer, "What the hell? Why did you shoot this guy?" The cop says, "What did you expect me to do? The guy drew a gun on me!"

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/kickypie
šŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
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Do you know that Iā€™m allergic to tequila?

Yeah, every time I drink it I break out in handcuffs ;)

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šŸ‘¤︎ u/Cosmic_Kate66
šŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2018
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I've just found some whips, mask and some handcuffs in my sisters room....

Absolutely had no idea she was a superhero !!!

šŸ‘︎ 5
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šŸ‘¤︎ u/VERBERD
šŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
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I've just found a whip, mask and some handcuffs in my sisters room...

Had no idea she was a superhero.

šŸ‘︎ 5
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šŸ‘¤︎ u/VERBERD
šŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
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