Where would you hear the most gossip from a prostitute?

A ho-tell. That's where she would go to get something off her chest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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What kind of mushroom loves to gossip?

A shit-talkey

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HandCrimped
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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You hear the gossip about butter?

Actually I’m not gonna spread it

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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At the company picnic, my co-worker said he had some juicy gossip. He loaded up his plate but tripped on the way to my table...

He spilled the beans!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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Our friend Tim is a little dyslexic, and hates gossip.

He keeps saying, β€œIt’s TMI.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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I remember when I once had a friends named Eni. We were best friends until one day, she gossiped about me and stopped hanging out with me. The following day, a teacher asked me if a had any friends,

I responded with β€œNo, not Eni.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SHiFT_VeLoCiiTy
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
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Did you know that your local podiatrist knows all the town rumors and gossip?

It's their job to know what's a foot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StuntsMonkey
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
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My Dad is Gossip Girls

So my dad is usually really quiet and "submissive" right? Like he doesn't do a lot of loud things except find the distance the chicken had to travel to cross the road in a bad dad joke.

Anyway, whenever one of us(a 6 people family) comments about something in a small group of 1-3 people, he's always got all the information. He just... knows. For example(this happened like 10 minutes ago): Me: "Wow, this tea is pretty sweet today." Mom: "well, did you sweeten it?" Me: "I d-" My dad shakes his head. Dad: "No, the person who made the tea added double the amount of sugar you previously added to the jug." Mom: "Who?" And then he points to the bedroom before I can tell my mom who made my glass of tea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charlestheseventh
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
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Two bookends gossiped to each other about the book in the middle saying...

...he's so shelf-centered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RCRadioCarbon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2019
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What do you call two bees who gossip?

Buzzybodies

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RCRadioCarbon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2019
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My masseuse friend is the biggest gossip I’ve ever seen.

He keeps talking behind people’s backs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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What do they call gossip you hear in restrooms?

Restrumors.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsKilLikeMine
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
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Norse gods and goddesses share juicy gossip often

and they've gotta keep it Loki.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aeonmymind
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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Where does a locomotive get its news and gossip from?

From its engine ear...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Herr_Opa
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2017
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I heard some salacious gossip about the prime minister of Canada

I don't think it's Trudeau

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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Breaking news: Donald Trump got a dog and the gossip is that this dog keeps humping everything. He's horny...

Which is to be expected since he is a trump-pet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/usedsurname
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2017
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"Don't talk to the liard, kids!"

So, I'm new to this subreddit, so please don't berate me for posting a story instead of a joke ;-;

Anyways, my friend came over to my house for a 2 day sleepover a few weeks ago, and during the sleepover, we went to Petco to buy some stuff for my ferret. While we were there, we just kept gossiping about how cute all the animals there were. There were parrots, other ferrets, turtles, fish, a cat, and lizards.

When we were checking out the lizards, my dad immediately started to warn us about them...

"Don't talk to the lizard, kids! It might want to sell you car insurance! It'll only take 15 minutes or less!"

Gosh, I love my dad XD

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HuskiePupper
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
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One Day in the Refrigerator

So I just spent the last ten minutes trying to come up with a joke to go with a punch line that popped in my head. (I have issues). Anyways, here it is- Milk and bologna were in the fridge gossiping about the neighbors when bologna said β€œI don't care for eggs, but I really like sausage.” to which mustard quipped β€œthat's what cheese said!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jabx33
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2017
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The tools of murder!

It was a dark and blustery Friday night. My wife and I were doubling with my sister and brother in-law at a delicious BBQ joint. Bro in-law (Jordan) asked us if we were up on the latest celebrity gossip.

Jordan - Did you hear about the actress who killed her husband?!

Us - what? No! Who?

Jordan - Ya! She stabbed him with a knife when he came home. I just can't remember who it was... What was her name?... Reese! Reese something...

Us - Wait! Witherspoon??!

Jordan - No! I just told you. With a knife!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/austynross
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2015
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Did you hear the gossip about Butter?

Actually, I’m not spreading it

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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Have any of you heard the gossip about butter?

Actually, I won’t spread it

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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Have you heard about the gossip about butter

Actually na i shouldn't spread it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChosenPrime1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2019
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Did you hear the gossip about butter?

Actually nah, I shouldn't spread it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cjkdash12
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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Have you heard about the gossip about butter?

Nah, actually, I shouldn't spread it.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2018
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