Which was the thiccest Gladiator of them all?

Gluteus Maximus

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xevailo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
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TIL Older forms of English kept Latin’s gender-specific suffixes -tor and -trix; tor is for men and trix is for women. So a male pilot is an aviator, a female pilot is an aviatrix. A male fighter is a gladiator, a female fighter is a gladiatrix.

This contrasts with the modern system, where tor is for both men and women, and trix are for kids.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neffability
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
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We were watching the movie Gladiator and then saw picctures of the hero now...

Now he is a "glad he ate"er..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mdchris19
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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What did the zombie gladiator say to the romans?

"ARE YOU NOT INTO BRAINS?! ARE YOU NOT. INTO. BRAINS!?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
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Where do skeletons go to see gladiators

The cal-o-cium

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Petey1210
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
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When gladiators fought lions, it was always the mane event
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πŸ‘€︎ u/topderp1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2017
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What did the Spartacus say when the lion ate his wife?

Nothing he was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsthewendigo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
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The Roman fighter showed no remorse as a cannibal. In fact...

He was gladiator

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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Why was was the unrepentant Roman who consumed his wife neither surprised nor scared when he was thrown into the Colosseum?

He was gladiator already.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trimofdoom
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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Did you hear about Russel Crow's recent problems with cannibalism? At first he expressed shame about eating the mother of two.

But upon further consideration he was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AShiggles
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
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My buddy just got the new Jeep truck

And he told me that the first thing he did in that truck was perform cunnalingus on his girlfriend.

Frankly, I'm just Gladiator.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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Was Spartacus upset that he had to cannibalize his wife?

No, he was gladiator 🍽

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thepointstudios
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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Why did the cannibalistic Roman slave warrior show no remorse over his recent female victim?

Because he was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/assafstone
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2020
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I dare you to read this

What tree do you wipe your hands on? A palm tree!

I heard a scary math joke, but I’m 2^^2 to tell it!

Have you heard of that new movie, β€œConstipation”? Well it doesn’t matter, it never came out.

I hurt myself when I went to a theme park in florida. When I went to the doctor, he started wrapping up my left leg, but then I pointed at my right and said β€œNo, doc, it’s dis knee.”

Last night I got mugged by 6 dwarves. Not Happy.

When Queen Elizabeth farts, everyone in the room must pretend like nothing happened. Noble Gasses don’t cause reactions, after all.

What’s the difference between a seal and a sea lion? One electron.

What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises? It becomes Daytrogen!

I called the animal shelter today and said "I've found six kittens in a suitcase in the woods." They said "Are they moving?" I replied "I don't know, but that would explain the suitcase."

Why can’t you trust Atoms? Because they make up everything!

Why do nerds wear glasses? It helps with division.

Why should you tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? You don’t wanna wake the sleeping pills.

What twitches and is found at the bottom of the ocean? A nervous wreck!

What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller!

What do you call a 3 foot tall psychic on the run from the law? A small medium at large!

Help, I can’t stop reading books with female protagonists! I’m a heroine addict!

How did Sparticus react when he ate his wife for dinner? He was gladiator!

When does a joke become a dad joke? When the punchline becomes apparent!

19 and 20 got into a fight… 21.

My friend told me, β€œPeople who sell meat are disgusting!” So I said, β€œYeah, well people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer!”

How can turtles take photos of themselves? Shell-fie sticks!

What do you call a secret agent molecule? Bond… ionic bond. β€œTaken, not shared.” What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? (Cut this part, but make a screeching noise)

How much does Santa’s sleigh cost? $0, it’s on the house.

If America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight there would be mass confusion.

I had a splinter once; it eventually got out of hand.

I’m going to go stand outside. If anyone asks, I’m outstanding.

Most people are shocked to find out how terrible an electrician I am!

What do mermaids wash their fins with? Tide What’s the coolest place to use the bathroom? The Lil Jon

Did you know that on average, people want three covers on their bed at all times? But that’s just a blanket statem

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kinjago
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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What did the Roman fighter say about his cannibalism?

He was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/etherreal
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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What is an unrepentant cannibal’s favorite movie?

Gladiator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eliza_Swain
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
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A cannibal took my sister to see a Russell Crowe movie

"Gladiator?"

"No I really miss her"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ImElyk
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
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The cannibal warrior who defeated his female opponent looked very satiated.

He was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iiWizrius
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
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What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?

A gladiator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/flontasticflonson
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2019
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Dadjoked while browsing netflix

So I was browsing netflix with the family earlier, and my 11 year old brother asked "what's Gladiator?" and my dad said "it's about a cannibal who eats women. After he eats them he's gladiator". It took me a second to get the joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dubya09
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2014
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Was looking through the TV channels with my dad...

And he sees the film "Gladiator" with Russell Crowe is on and he looks at me and goes "Gladiator!! And so was she!!!" Hahahaha I just about fucking died.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/danielsucksvagin
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2014
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A cannibal once took my sister to see a Russell Crowe movie.

Gladiator?

No, I really miss her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
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What did Russel Crowe say after the cannibal ate his wife?

I’m gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/InotMeowMeow
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2018
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Dad: "Hear about the happy Roman?"

ME: No, what?

Dad: gladiator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dittybopper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2013
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My dad came into my room a little tipsy, and dropped this one on me.

Dad: What do you call a guy smiling, while he goes down on a girl

Me: What?

Dad: A Gladiator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChaBoiDoe
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2014
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