An alternative... was that A'Tuin was crawling from the Birthplace to the Time of Mating. When they arrived they would briefly and passionately mate, for the first and only time, and from that fiery union new turtles would be born to carry a new pattern of worlds.

This was known as the Big Bang hypothesis.

Joke by Terry Pratchett, β€˜The Colour of Magic’, Prologue.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ‘€︎ u/WatashiStickKid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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Bar talk: Dude 1: What was that song by Eric Burdon again; something about love is on fire? Dude 2: Yeah. Yeah. "Love is a burnin' thing, and it makes a fiery ring..."

Dude 3: I think it was Hotel California. "Last thing I remember, I was running for the door..."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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Did you hear about the Zen master that walked across the fiery coals?

He had Flaming Hot Chi-toes.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ‘€︎ u/jebjum
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
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[Request] guy fieri pun
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/nice_try_tyler
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2016
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What would happen to all of us if the zombie virus only affected redheads?


πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/Colorado_kindbudz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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Why won't cannibals eat redheads?

They don't want gingervitis.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ‘€︎ u/arrenlex
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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Charmander in Chief
πŸ‘︎ 180
πŸ‘€︎ u/han_so_low
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2016
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Every time I grill I get raked over the coals by my family. Apparently brat jokes are the wurst.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/wiseshanks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2018
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My friend will be a great dad

I'm an Asian and my friend and I have AP Calculus together and he sits right next to me. I had trouble with a derivative and our conversation went along the lines of:
me: I don't know how to do this derivative.
friend: Well you see, you're Asian so you're bad at deriving.
me: groan^1000 ^hot ^fiery ^suns

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ‘€︎ u/yellananner
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2014
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Diners, drive-ins, and dad jokes

My gf and I were watching the food network when Guy Fieri comes on for a commercial. I start to rant about my general annoyance with him.

Me: "... yada, yada, yada... his hair just makes me..."

GF: "Fieri-ous?"

I had to stop mid rant because that was pretty good! I think my girlfriend became a dad.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ‘€︎ u/theKKrowd
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2017
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My Christian-Dad was obviously the inspiration for Ned Flanders

Dad: "Time for bed, kids"

Kids: "Throw us in bed! Throw us in bed!"

(Dad picks a kid up in his arms)

Dad: "Did I ever tell you about the three men in the book of Daniel who were thrown into the fiery furnace?"

Kids: "No!"

Dad: "Their names were... Shadrach... Meshach... and ToBedYouGo!

(tosses squealing kid through the air, onto the bed)

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ‘€︎ u/cyclura
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2013
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