I hear they are making a new Star Trek movie about the crew stealing the Enterprise and going to a planet to search for a mythical spoon with tines...

It's Star Trek: The Search for Spork

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
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My dad just got a bidet and said he’s calling it The Enterprise

because it goes around Uranus killing Klingons

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsnotnotme
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2020
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I started a successful enterprise building yachts in my attic

Sales are through the roof

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jthornborrow21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
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What do the starship enterprise and toilet paper have in common?

They both circle Uranus looking for clingons.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/peterypan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2019
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I got a big promotion! I'm now the Electronic Innovation and Entertainment Information Officer for Elderly McDonald's Agricultural Enterprises.

I can't wait to put E.I.E.I.O. on my resume!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nesogra
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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What do the star ship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?

They both look for "cling ons" around "Uranus"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JamesBlitz00
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2016
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My brother was obsessed with the Enterprise, Kurt, Spock, Scotty, Lt. Uhura and Dr. McCoy but hated the Next Generation and all the others.

He had a one Trek Mind.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
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What technology gets the Starship Enterprise going?

Spock plugs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lucidus_somniorum
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
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Why is toilet paper like the Starship Enterprise?

They both go around Uranus hunting for Klingons.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vapewithJah
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
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Nobody is talking about Elon Musk's tunnel digging enterprise, The Boring Company...

It's not very interesting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2018
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What did spock find in the USS Enterprise toilet?

Captains log.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CarradinesSon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2017
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What do you call it when the crew of the starship enterprise enters a massive, destructive weather pattern?

An Uhuracane

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zibani
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2018
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If the Captain of the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701-D) were to betray one of his crew members...

would that crew member be hoisted by his own Picard?

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2016
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Why is toilet paper more powerful than the USS Enterprise?

Because it can circle Ur anus and wipe out kling ons

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πŸ‘€︎ u/josamo8
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2017
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David Bowie's Culinary Enterprises

David Bowie is reported to be opening a pop-up one time food stand next Saturday in Santa Monica. There will be Gyros, but just for one day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/george__kaplan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2015
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How come no one dared to use the ladies room on the starship enterprise?

Because William Shatner.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kopextacy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2016
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Did you hear about the cook onboard the USS Enterprise who spilled flour all over the galley?

He had a starch wreck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/justablur
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2016
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Apparently an unaired episode of Next Generation featured a genestealer villain who tried to make evil clones of the Enterprise's crew.

they say he was hoist by his own Picard...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpacemanBates
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2016
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how they got to the enterprise. imgur.com/hsRL7BT
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ffngg
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2014
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Idea for the next Star Trek TV show: back to classic Trek. The newest Enterprise, exploring the galaxy. Twist: it's crewed entirely by aliens

Star Trek: the Mex Generation

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2016
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"Watching all series about Star Trek would really be an endeavor" "don't you mean... ENTERPRISE"

Not even safe on snap chat from these puns

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πŸ‘€︎ u/petticoatwar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2015
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Is Michael Giacchino the greatest Star Trek Dad Joker in the world?

He must have it in his Genes.

But seriously check out his Star Trek track listings. The guy loves a good pun.

Star Trek

  1. Star Trek

  2. Nailin' The Kelvin

  3. Labor Of Love

  4. Hella Bar Talk

  5. Enterprising Young Men

  6. Nero Sighted

  7. Nice To Meld You

  8. Run And Shoot Offense

  9. Does It Still McFly?

  10. Nero Death Experience

  11. Nero Fiddles, Narada Burns

  12. Back From Black

  13. That New Car Smell

  14. To Boldly Go

  15. End Credits

Star Trek Into Darkness

  1. Logos / Pranking The Natives

  2. Spock Drops, Kirk Jumps

  3. Sub Prime Directive

  4. London Calling

  5. Meld-Merized

  6. The Kronos Wartet

  7. Brigadoom

  8. Ship To Ship

  9. Earthbound And Down

  10. Warp Core Values

  11. Buying The Space Farm

  12. The San Fran Hustle

  13. Kirk Enterprises

  14. Star Trek Main Theme

Star Trek Beyond

  1. Logo and Prosper

  2. Thank Your Lucky Star Date

  3. Night on the Yorktown

  4. The Dance of the Nebula

  5. A Swarm Reception

  6. Hitting the Saucer a Little Hard

  7. Jaylah Damage

  8. In Artifacts as in Life

  9. Franklin, My Dear

  10. A Lesson in Vulcan Mineralogy

  11. MotorCycles of Relief

  12. Mocking Jaylah

  13. Crash Decisions

  14. Krall-y Krall-y Oxen Free

  15. Shutdown Happens

  16. Cater-Krall in Zero G

  17. Par-tay for the Course

  18. Star Trek Main Theme

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegeneral400
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2018
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Did you hear about the car rental business that was just convicted of a crime?

It was a criminal Enterprise

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MisterThog
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2018
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What version of Windows 7 does Spock use?

Enterprise!... ^I'll ^see ^myself ^out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/epicmindwarp
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2014
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I actually submitted my own idea for a Deadpool movie.

He survives through to the 24th century and gets his own ship. He somehow runs afoul of a certain Bajoran captain who used to be a distinguished ensign on the Enterprise, under Captain Picard.

The movie then becomes about their conflict. The response from the studio wasn't kind. They said I should abort the idea. They said it would be too controversial to make a movie about Ro v. Wade.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Myntrith
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2016
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Dad Joked by a Thomas Jefferson Impersonator at Work Today

Would this be considered a dad joke or an 18/19th century dad joke? Either way, I just about walked out the building after reading this.

ME: Hi Tom,

Thank you for taking the time to speak with me today and if there is anything we can do in the future, please don't hesitate to ask.

I was hoping you would be able to leave a Yelp review for other potential clients to see. I know that we will not be working together anymore, but we would really appreciate the feedback.

Thomas Jefferson: Matt,

Happy to offer you an encomium, however, I know of no connection between hounds striking the line of scent on a fox and complimenting a business enterprise of the 21st century.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Smashfield5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2016
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What do the starship enterprise and a roll of toilet paper have in common?

They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrMephistoX
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2017
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What do the Starship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?

They both circle Uranus in search of cling-ons.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ‘€︎ u/ErnieDouglas
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2013
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