por ejemplo - http://docuwiki.net/index.php?title=Precision:_The_Measure_of_All_Things
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”
“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.
Mentos
(I will see myself out)
The doctor says it terminal.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
I have been with the same MSP since it’s inception. This company pivoted from another avenue to MSP. I kind of got adopted through an asset buyout of the company I originally worked for. Ya, I can do all these other tasks that the company originally did primarily. But where they found me good for them was in the MSP division.
I headed in there with some book knowledge and a ton of hands on, mostly self-taught from a series of books my neighbor gave me that he got from a foreclosure lockout. MCSE server 2000. In a few months of being in the division I found myself in Teir 3 (mostly because Kazza and Edonkey nuked my network every other week back in the day). A few months later I was running the division. I have now been here for nearly 10 years and have reached C Suite. Now I don’t have a bunch of crisp papers saying that I read all the books and aced all the tests but there isn’t much I can’t figure out before clients get mad.
For a long time (years) I ran the whole department by myself. Somewhere between the 175 seat range all the way up to the 550 range with some pumpkin plans and a couple of lost clients. During that time I was sales, marketing (yes I have been to several Robin Robins and we are a member of producers), and T1-3, and anything else they desired. Ultimately, generating the lead, doing the sales calls, all those shiny rapid-fire reports, multiple touches to each prospect. All this on top of managing to fulfill the SLA written in our MSA for the existing clients and maintaining a high close rate for new.
Enter prospect, sell the client on “insurance” of networking. Sell hardware to bring them up to a baseline. Reconfigure/deploy/ engineer the entire network from the ground. Migrate on prem systems to new hardware/OS and P2V the workloads. Migrate them to Office 365. And finally onboard. All of this while keeping my SLAs of existing clients while covering the noise of onboarding new with a side of designing and maintaining our RMM and CRM.
I eventually got to a point where I opted to hire. Mainly because my work hours crossed so far over into my family life that my employer had to make a move to ease the tension in my house. Now, I am up to several techs and seats closer to 2k. I built our stack. And have managed to fight off the attack vectors left and right from our RMM tools and associated practices. (to date not had an event).
In the last few years, we have taken on GOV contractors. Some of you know what this means. Again, I
... keep reading on reddit ➡Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?
We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.
Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
He lost May
Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.
Gender is fluid.
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
But let me give it a shot.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
He’s the new temp.
And now I’m cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
But that’s comparing apples to oranges
And boy are my arms legs.
Amy
Put it on my bill
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
They’re on standbi
