What did the cook say to the bomb defuse specialist?

We’re running out of Thyme!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Varyze_
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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The bomb didn't want to go off.

So it refused.

πŸ‘︎ 609
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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If you ever have to defuse a bomb, never cut...

The Blew wire.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hastingsmedic
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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Dad Jokes defuse tense situations

I was home earlier than normal, and dad was in basement.

Dad: "Who's there, I'm armed." Me: "I'm legged." Both: Laugh. Tension gone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/riftrender
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2016
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Can you help me come up with some jokes for a mental health workshop?

I have to give a workshop on anxiety and depression today and I would like to have some jokes locked in to defuse the tension if needed. I usually don't have much trouble to come up with dad jokes on the go, but it would be nice to have some in the back burner. Thanks!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/versung
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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Got my girlfriend on an early drive this morning.

My girlfriend was driving us to into town early this morning for work, it was dark and we all had lights on. A waste disposal truck coming the other way narrowly misses us as it overtakes a cyclist on a blind corner. My girlfriend gets angry because of their stupidity, I wait a split second and say:

"I guess they're just a rubbish lorry driver"

It didn't defuse the situation...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RagingSantas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2014
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