What body part do you spell using the letters P, E, N, I, and S?

Spine.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 31
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HisokaLaMagician
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What a coincidence!
๐Ÿ‘︎ 27
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/hilloviikot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I'm hungry.

Hi everyone. I'm hungry.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NoUseForAName2222
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I don't know if it's coincidence, but both my kids absolutely love surprise eggs. They're obsessed with them!

And neither of them were planned!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dongwaffler
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
After this week's bad weather in Texas, there'll probably be a baby boom in nine months.

That snow coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/engfish
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My son asked me, โ€œDad, what is coincidence?โ€

I said, โ€œWeird. I was about to ask you the same thing.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 237
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 08 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A guy walks into a bar and is surprised to see his family doctor there

A guy walks into a bar and is surprised to see his family doctor there, so he walks over to join him. "What a coincidence!" the guy says. "I was just saying earlier today that I really needed a doctor's appointment." The doctor pulls up his calendar on his phone and says, "Well, how about 10 tomorrow?" "No," the guy replies. "I don't need that many."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 82
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Firegoat1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
In an announcement to coincide with International Women's Day, the Church of England has announced a drive to increase the number of female vicars...

They want to decrease the gender pray gap

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cybot2001
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Two conspiracy theorists walk into a bar

You can't tell me that's a coincidence

๐Ÿ‘︎ 998
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thesabermaniac
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Bonheur is French for happiness. Boner is English for a good time. Coincidence?
๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/electricdog
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 01 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The Dad , the Daughter and her prayers.

A father is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bed. The daughter says โ€œGod bless Mummy and God Bless Daddy and God bless Grandma and good bye Grandad.โ€ The father says, โ€œGood bye Grandad? Why is that?โ€ The daughter says, โ€œJust because I felt like it.โ€ The next day, Grandad drops dead. The father canโ€™t believe the coincidence, but decided not to question it. That night, he listens to the daughterโ€™s prayers again. She says, โ€œGod bless Mummy and God bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma.โ€ The father is shocked again and asks his daughter why, but she says again, โ€œJust because I felt like it.โ€ The next day, the Grandma drops dead and now the Father is getting worried but doesnโ€™t know what to do, so he tries to forget about it. That night, he listens to his daughter again and she says, โ€œGod bless Mummy and goodbye Daddy.โ€ The father is now terrified and goes to work the next day sweating, cancels all of his meetings, and hides in his office for the whole day. He doesnโ€™t go home and stays there until midnight. Heโ€™s very surprised. โ€˜Iโ€™ve cheated death!โ€™ he thinks to himself, then rushes home. His wife asks, โ€œWhere have you been?!โ€ and the husband says, โ€œOh donโ€™t ask me any questions, todayโ€™s been miserable.โ€ The wife replies, โ€œYour days been miserable? Well, listen to my day! Firstly, the milk man drops dead on the porchโ€ฆโ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HereIsAFookinName
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Saw this on Me_irl. Thought it fits here.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 96
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/pikapikaMF6969
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Today I ate like 300 ants.

I saw a bunch of ants swarming around a Snickers bar on the ground. I thought to myself "What a coincidence, I just ate a Snickers too!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CSwork1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 02 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My mate, Skippy, is a bit of a nerd. Just last night he spent 2 hours telling me about all the characters named Kang.

For instance, Kang the Conqueror is a fictional supervillain appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. In 2009, Kang was ranked as IGN's 65th Greatest Comic Book Villain of All Time

or

In the Simpsons , Kang is a Rigellian from Rigel 7. He and his sister Kodos continuously try to take over Earth and are usually seen attacking Springfield. Kang and Kodos have a lot of space weaponry at hand and have their own spaceship. They speak the Rigellian language, which, by coincidence, is identical to English. Although they look identical, Kang has a deeper voice than Kodos.

I guess you could say Skippy is a Kang Guru...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AustralianGroan
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
This is a little long so get ready

So this dad likes to listen to his daughter's prayers every time she does them. One night when he is standing by her door, he overhears her say "God bless mom, God bless dad, God bless grandma, and goodbye grandpa." The dad is thinking "Ok that was pretty weird, but whatever."

The next morning, he learns that the grandpa DIED. He remembers what his daughter said last night and thinks "Ok umm this could all just be a coincidence" and he thinks nothing of it.

A month later and the daughter is doing the prayers again. "God bless mom, God bless dad, and goodbye grandma."

Once again, the dad learns the next morning, that the grandma has died from a heart attack. Now he's a little freaked out and thinks "This definitely cannot be a coincidence now, but it still could be, so whatever."

A few weeks later, he hears from his daughter's room, again, "God bless mom, and goodbye dad." Now he is totally freaking out because he thinks he's gonna die today. He spends all day being really cautious so he, you know, doesn't die. At 12:00am, he thinks "Yes! I made it! I didn't die!"

Once he gets home from work, he goes over and he tells his wife, "Honey, I've had a really bad day today and-"

The wife cuts in and says, "Yea me too! The mailman died on our porch!"

~this is my first post so โ•ฎ(โ”€โ–ฝโ”€)โ•ญ ~

๐Ÿ‘︎ 82
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/theresnogoodname
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What would you say if you got a nickel for every book youโ€™ve read?

Iโ€™d say thatโ€™s pretty coincidental.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ayuum
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 17 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Help! I think I'm being stalked...

I keep getting sent flowers with the heads cut off

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/nonresidentialdot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
last night i had a dream i was a muffler, and it scared me because i woke up... exhausted ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
๐Ÿ‘︎ 26
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CCisme5
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
2 conspiracy theorists stumble upon each other,

it can't be a coincidence

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/S_yNtaX
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I ran into a guy today who once sold me a tiny globe.

It's a small world.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 28
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Damu1969
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 03 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Early morning work groans are the best groans

A little too proud of this one...

So Iโ€™m on my usual Tuesday morning conference call with a bunch of vendors, coworkers, bosses, etc...

With his dog barking in the background one of my bosses chimes in and says โ€œJust so you all know, Iโ€™m on the call but Iโ€™m outside right now having my roof looked at so I might be a little distractedโ€.

I couldnโ€™t resist... With the instincts of a wild puma plotting against itโ€™s poor defenseless prey, I pounce...

โ€œIs your dog lookin at it?

Cuz he keeps saying ROOF!!! ROOF ROOF!!!โ€

I was immediately rewarded with a spectacular cacophony of groans and โ€œthat was awfulโ€โ€™s... It was glorious. Iโ€™m pretty sure Iโ€™ll get another promotion for it.

EDIT: So... no promotion... but in a pure, hilarious coincidence, I actually DID just get the news that I'm finally getting that raise they promised me at my last review. Too fuckin funny.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 441
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/OreoGaborio
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 10 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My Waitress Tonight Told I Had To Post This

Scene: Dinner for my mom's birthday at a very nice (expensive) restaurant.

Waitress: Your steak comes with a choice of the vegetable of the day or a twice baked potato.

Me: Are twice baked potatoes and refried beans prepared similar ways or is that just a naming coincidence?

W: Laughing Oh my God. Our bartender and I were just talking about funny "dad jokes" on reddit! I didn't expect to hear one in person. Do you use reddit?

M: Umm... Yeah... I actually follow r/dadjokes but I'm not a dad and

W: You should post that joke there!

I have no idea if she will see this but my wife said I had to let everyone know about a redditor interaction. I hope she does because the food was awesome and she was a fantastic waitress beyond being a fellow redditor.

I still have no idea if twice baked potatoes and refried beans have any link...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 24
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
An old guy and a young guy were pushing their carts at Home Depot when they collided. The old guy says to the young guy, โ€œSorry about that. Iโ€™m looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going.โ€

The young guy says, โ€œThatโ€™s okay. Itโ€™s a coincidence. Iโ€™m looking for my wife, too. I canโ€™t find her and Iโ€™m getting a bit anxious.โ€

The old guy says, โ€œWell maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?"

The young guy says, โ€œShe is 28 years-old, tall, with brown hair, blue eyes, long legs, big boobs and sheโ€™s wearing tight white shorts. What does your wife look like?โ€

The old guy says, โ€œDoesn't matter, letโ€™s look for yours.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 116
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?

Patient: Cancer

Doctor: well THATS a coincidence

๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/n-wordpass-DENIED
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The stock trader was able to afford his new landscaping...

...after making so much money in his hedge fund.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bbbbirdistheword
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 23 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Praying

So a dad walks in on his daughter praying. She said, โ€œI pray for mommy, I pray for daddy, I pray for grandma, and goodbye grandpa.โ€ The dad didnโ€™t know what she meant. But the next day, the grandpa died. The dad thought it was just a coincidence, until the next day the daughter said, โ€œI pray for mommy, I pray for daddy, and goodbye grandma.โ€ The father thought it was odd but went to bed. The next day the grandma died. The dad was terrified, he heard the daughter say, โ€œI pray to mommy and goodbye daddy.โ€ The dad the next day was restless. Then, at night he realized nothing was going to happen. He said to his wife, โ€œ I had the most horrible day.โ€ The wife replied, I did to the milkman died at the door step today.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 24
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NashYaBoi
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 02 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
So a White Horse walks into a Pub....

......the barman says โ€œainโ€™t that a coincidence, our pub is named after you!โ€ โ€œWhy did you name your Pub Eric?โ€ the horse replies.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cwwspurs
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 23 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Romaine Calm

Romaine calm. The government did not Caesar vegetables. They will lettuce know what's going on soon. That's salad o' panic over what may be just a coincidence. If it's a false alarm somebody's going to get a dressing down. E. Coli like I see it.*

*So many puns in such bad taste. Too Soonโ„ข?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/The_Possum
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How did early people discover wool?

By shear coincidence

๐Ÿ‘︎ 43
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Subscribe_to_Sam24
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just discovered this subreddit after searching for an old joke to see if it had been posted...

And the joke has been posted in this subreddit literally every two days for the past week.

And I think it is hilarious because that is exactly how dad jokes are in real life. Dads always repeating the same joke youโ€™ve heard over and over. I even checked the rules to see if reposting was actively encouraged because I thought it was too great to be a coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/glorifiedpenguin
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The one cent penny and other low-value currency are used very little these days.

Itโ€™s no coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/LongneckBottles
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Was re-watching the more recent Spider-Man movies, and only just realized this! imgur.com/FZIMv23
๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/fellatio-del-toro
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 16 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My son had a dream last night.

He dreamed that his teacher died in a car crash and came to us in a panic worried and telling us to warn her. My wife and I told him that it was just a dream and to go back to bed. The next day he came home crying because his teacher never made it to work and died in a car crash. We were worried but explained to him it must have been a coincidence.

A few weeks later he rushed into our room again crying saying he saw daddy die in a dream but didnt remember how. My wife calmed him down but now I was seriously worried. The next day I went to work in a constant panic. The drive there, all day throughout work scared if something would happen. All day nothing.

I finally got home and came to the door to see my wife. I told her I had the worst day of my life. She turned to me and said,"you think you had an awful day? This morning after you left for work the mailman died on our doorstep!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MaezRunner097
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
So I've been getting into haberdashery lately...

It coincides with my other passion, camping

Creating new things for when I'm in the woods has been the most exciting time of my life

It's sewing tents

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MarlyUK
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
It's quite odd..

If you tie two pieces of string together. It just so happens that they are both touching eachother.. Coincidence? I think knot.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sych224
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
All these sheep look the same..

by shear coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 27
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/A_Bridgeburner
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 19 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I finally read that book on clocks.

It was about time.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 24
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/qhs3711
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 07 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Dads and their puns.

My Dad said this one at the store. "Look their protein is on sale. Some people would say no whey."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bertomcd
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2013
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I need a punny movie title!

I've been working on a screenplay for a movie (nothing big, nothing even medium-sized, I'm pretty much doing it for fun with one of my friends) and we can't think of a clever movie title. The TL;DR version is it's about a bartender who accidentally steals a undercover cops ID just by coincidence. It's not a comedy (asides from a but of dry humor) so nothing too dadjokey, no offense to r/dadjokes, but just a good clever pun would be great. If you have any ideas please let me know! Thanks!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/iPundemic
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 21 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
When I was a kid, my dad got all my friends with this one:

Dad: How old are you?

Friend: I'm 11

Dad: 11! What a coincidence, when I was your age, I was 11 too.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 199
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/freeseasy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 04 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
JFK Tragedy Bonding with my dad just now
๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Topsiders
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2013
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Stupid crackers! You'll never amount to anything! What are you, anyway? Flour, salt, and what? You're nothing!

When my wife finally asked what I was doing, yelling at a bag of crackers, I explained that the recipe called for 30 crushed crackers.

That happened 2 days ago. By coincidence, we had another recipe for dinner that required crushed crackers, and my wife made sure I understood that it meant physically, not verbally.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/spongebue
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar

You can't tell me that's just a coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 431
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/skydivinghuman
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Three conspiracy theorists walk in to a bar...

You can't tell me that's just a coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 61
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/simplyGagi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar

You canโ€™t tell me thatโ€™s just a coincidence.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 248
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NoShittyTacos
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.