You would think that the state that is most popular for Casino's and lucrative businesses...
...would be better at counting
During Coronavirus, always pay businesses with cash where possible.
It will help them make a gross profit.
Businesses are starting to open up. In fact, the LEGO store is open now, but I recommend staying away for a while.
People will be lined up for blocks.
Why will orthodontists and nail salons be the first businesses to reopen?
Because they're fighting tooth and nail for it.
I called five different businesses to fix the leak in my roof - none did.
But Seal Team Six got the job done!
There are so many businesses that deliver right now
but I'd really prefer to keep my liver.
You know why you should be my partner in the marijuana businesses?
Because you know I won’t smoke up all the profits.
Recreational marijuana was just legalized here in the state of Michigan, so my dad just had to make a joke. 🙄
I just got fired from a job at a convention center explaining in simple terms to businesses why they should come demo their products at our conventions.
It's my exposition exposition ex-position.
Local businesses name puns, always a treasure
The city of St. Louis is offering huge tax breaks to major corporations so that big businesses can move in.
Because Missouri loves Company.
You know, the cemetery business is one of the best businesses to invest in.
People are dying to get in.
Why are US businesses moving to Mexico?
They can’t afford to peso much here!
Challenge - What are punny names for businesses?
i started an insurance company for flower and gardening businesses...
it's called "oopsie daisies"
3 different businesses on 3 different floors of my work place...
Me: I think the bottom floor builds coffins
Dad: That sounds like a dying business... huge cheesy grin
I'm going to start a yacht building business in my attic
Sails should go through the roof
I asked my friend to come to the gym with me. He said he was busy for the next 7 days....
Bit of a week excuse if you ask me.
I recently started a new business making Irish lawn chairs
I call it Paddy O’Furniture
What’s the difference between someone going to prison and a guy who has a mobile knife sharpening business?
One gets incarcerated, the other is in-car-serrated
William Shatner, Star Trek’s Captain Kirk, is said to be extremely disappointed after the collapse of his recently launched women’s underwear business...
Apparently, nobody was interested in buying ‘Shatner Panties’.
I have a business selling foreign ants.
If I was a smart but unscrupulous high school student, I would start a business doing other kids' homework for a nominal fee.
The name of the business?
"Nerdy deeds, done dirt cheap"
I considered giving up my honey business and joining a cult
But I'm just not a bee leaver.
Edit: Thank you for the award, friend!!!!
I invested in a business idea with some dermatologists.
I was glad they had some skin in the game.
I had to fire the guy I hired to mow my lawn.
When I left home to go on a business trip, my wife said "Don't forget to write"
I thought, "That's unlikely... it's a basic skill, isn't it?"
Everyone loves my "moderately large business agreement" costume at this fancy dress party.
Why did the spider just mind it's own business making a web?
To make sure I wasn't being bugged
Why did the balloon factory go out of business?
My buddy Neil decided to get into a new kind of business designing keyholes for small houses
So we gave him the nickname shack keyhole Neil
Entangled business deal
If a spider catches more moths than they need, can they sell them on the web?
I'm starting a ridesharing business for underserved rural communities.
I'm going to call it Goober.
What do you call the money your garbage business earns?
I'm trying to start up my own business, recycling discarded chewing gum.
Just need help getting it off the ground.
I've met this french business woman recently. She was so beautiful and so wealthy, I just couldn't resist her and her lovely
I’m just here mining my own business...
Why are locksmiths allowed to remain open during lockdown?
I started an Origami business once
Gave it up though, too much paperwork
I ordered a Hit Man to take care of my business partner the other day.
After a change of heart I cancelled the order, but it was too late.
He'd been despatched.
Which digital payment system does the pope use?
Selling kitchen utensils is a wisky business
So is selling hard liquor
After achieving universal peace, the Guardians of the Galaxy settled down and opened a floor tile business.
I started a new business farming microscopic fish
It's a small scale operation
Why wasn't RBG a business executive?
My friend and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
I was getting close to retiring and offered my compost business to my son.
He replied, “I refuse to work with compost! It’s so degrading!”
I am finally ready to accept applications for my deer cloning business...
It's for anyone looking to make a quick buck.
Once I was in a yogurt shop minding my own business, when I heard a couple of women talking in an interesting accent at one of the nearby tables.
I glanced over and noticed that they were quite attractive. A little on the larger side, but that never stopped me before. So, yogurt cup in hand, I boldly approached their table.
“Excuse me,” I said, “I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation, and I noticed your lovely accents. Are you two ladies from Scotland by any chance?”
They immediately bristled at my question, obviously offended, and one of them snapped at me, “It’s Wales!”
“No offense intended,” I replied. “Please allow me to try again...are you two whales from Scotland?”
Friend made it for business
I have a busy morning at work, but had to take a poop...
I ain’t got time for this shit.
What’d that cab driver say to the guy getting in his car with a cheap hooker?
Started a boat building business in my attic.
The sales are going through the roof!
I've started a boating business from my attic....
The sails are going through the roof.
I've started a boating business from my attic.
The sails are going through the roof.
I started a boating business in my attic..
Sails are through the roof.
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