She said, "leaf me alone."
The Naval Corps.
It seems he wasn't very poplar, and is now deciduously less alive. If he returns from the dead, he'll definitely be pining for revenge.
...A pair of Velcrows obviously.
She immediately raised it above her head and said, “This is a stick up!”
(Credit to my 2.5 year old- inspired by true events)
He was a fanta-stick buddy.
This is a STICK-up!
You are my root
Boy, was that hawkward.
Recovering and bruised, he slowly climbs the tree again, jumps and falls to the ground.
The turtle tries again and again, while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watch his pathetic efforts.
Finally, the female bird turns to her mate, “Darling, don't you think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted?"
The Air Force; they're US AF
He looks down and sees that a full-grown elephant is slowly clambering up the tree. When the elephant finally reaches the branch the squirrel asks, "Why on earth did you climb up into this pine tree?!"
The elephant then says, "I came up here to eat some pears, of course."
The squirrel, completely shocked at the elephant's ignorance, exclaims, "You elephants don't know the first thing about trees! This is a PINE tree, there are no pears here."
The elephant then explains, "Oh, I know, I brought my own."
One falls off, the one still on the branch asked “are you OK?”
The one the ground said “I’ll live”
Sadly, MS-TRES never became popular.
That's why he joined the Na'vi.
A whittle at a time
Thanks to /u/Redpike136 for the joke.
So my friend got a job managing a branch for a granite company. And whilst telling my father he dadjoked me pretty hard.
Me: Ya he is managing a granite branch or something.
Dad: Well then, I was not aware that granite grew on trees...
Needless to say i wasn't expecting it.