Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school?
I suggested my son wear a hi-hat for hat day at school but he said no.
Apparently he's not into cymbalism.
There was a kidnapping at my sons school today.
He woke up after about 20 minutes.
My favourite teacher at school was Mrs Turtle...
Strange name, but she tortoise well .
I'm allergic to sesame seeds, so back in Year 3 at primary school, people would tell this joke:
What show is Dec allergic to?
Sesame Street!
While waiting for a school-related live stream, me and my friend decided to throw words at each other and make puns out of them. This is one of my most proudest puns.
What do you call taking just one term at a French immersion school?
What did the buffalo say when he dropped his kid off at school?
At my school, there's a large lizard that wanders the halls all day.
I was terrible at spelling when I was at school.
Brilliant at jography though.
What di they serve at the cannibal school?
This was at my high school
Just got an epic eye roll for this: My son was showing me his school work from math, where he was learning fractions. I pointed to where he wrote his name on a line at the top and asked what that fraction was.
I told him it should be {Sons Name} / Mommy. Since he came from her.
Then I said he could reduce that fraction further since he came from his mommy, that fraction would equal....
One Whole
Is it o.k. to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school...
....or, am I a really bad teacher ?
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner
What do Santa's little helpers learn at school?
A son tells his Dad he wants to win the limbo contest at his school...
His dad says, "That's a pretty low bar."
A nominee for director of the math department at my school was caught having an affair with her student...
I failed maths so many times at school.
I’m at school and I feel the urge to use the bathroom
Me: teacher can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: it’s may
Me: no it’s not, it’s December
I tried to make a reservation at the school library. The librarian say I couldn't.
They were completely booked.
I’m at my school talent show and this guy said...
“before I start, I would like to check if my mic is working..”
“if your name is Michael, please stand up”
then a couple of guys stand up
and he goes
“that concludes my mike check”
(I saw this tweet and just had to share it!)
Click here for credit
There was a kidnapping at my son’s school this week.
Fortunately he woke up after half an hour.
Told to me this morning by my 9yo son - I was very proud!
The one subject I was bad at in school
I remember having rocks thrown at me because I was a nerd in high school.
As they hit me, I thought, “that’s not gneiss.”
At international cheese school what did the teacher say to Netherland's cheese when it asked a doubt?
8yo nephew's an early bloomer. Gets home, tells his dad, "There was a kidnaping at school today." Dad: "What!?!" 8yo, dead serious, -
"It's okay, dad... He woke up." Doesn't even smile. Walks away.
I'm surprised to find myself working at NASA even though i never graduated high school.
Someone had to clean the toilets and keep the place clean.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school?
It was a short nap, only about 20 minutes.
I was in a food fight at school & accidentally hit the principal with a stale cafeteria bun...
...the jerk had me charged; assault with a breadly weapon.
At school they used to call me The Elephant Man.
I like to think it's because I had a good memory.
A guy at school kept hitting me with poultry...
What do frat boys at chiropractor school call each other?
Kid: Oh man dad, today's test at school was difficult. There was a test with like 99 problems on it -and one of those problems was a real bitch.
Dad: Well we know one thing. Your teacher is not Jay-z!
Do you know what is used to provide vision at night at school playgrounds?
My wife threw a saucer at me because I hadn't completed the science project of our kid until then. Interestingly, he won first prize at school for presenting a
Did you hear about the kidnapping at a elementary school?
A buffalo dropped his boy off at school and said...
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school?
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school today?
Did tou hear about the kidnapping at school?
No need to worry. He eventually woke up.
Did you guys hear about the kidnapping at school?
What did the father buffalo say to his kid while dropping him off at school?
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
What did the buffalo say to his kid when he dropped him off at school?
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
