What happens to funny vikings when they die?

They go to Val-haha

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JH1234567989
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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A viking named Rudolph The Red was looking out his window one day

"Its going to rain soon" he said to his wife. "How could you possibly know that?" She asked. He simply replied, "Because Rudolph The Red knows rain, dear."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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How did Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blindeye0505
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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Many years ago there was a vicious viking named RΓΌdoff.

RΓΌdoff was one of the best fighters in his village and a terrifying opponent on the battlefield. He would often return from battle, so drenched in his opponent's blood that he became known as "RΓΌdoff det rΓΈde", meaning "the red".

After years of wars, and regular battles, RΓΌdoff finally grew old, and decided that his fighting days were behind him. He became the best farmer that his village had ever known and people would travel from.far away to ask him about his crops and to predict the weather, as he was quite proficient at it.

One morning he wokeup, and looked out the window, the skys were clear and the sun was shining, but RΓΌdoff could feel the pressure in his old bones and battle scars

"It will Rain soon", he said to his wife while she made breakfast. She glanced outside and told him he was nuts, it was bright and sunny.

He simply hiked up his pants and reminded her:

RΓΌdoff The Red knows rain, dear.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/smoffatt34920
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Why did the Viking buy an old boat?

He couldn’t a fjord a new one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?

Aesir what you did there.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Khaos_Gorvin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man

... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SumFunnyOne
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
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Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.

They were quite MEADiocre

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashnakag3019
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?

Because of Loki.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/writer_savant
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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A Viking explorer came home to find his name removed from the town register. When his wife complained, the chief apologized and said,

β€œI must have taken Lief off my census”.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CheeseheadDave
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
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How do Vikings talk to each other?

Using Norse code

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πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
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Recently revived my desire to watch Viking shows.

My interest was Bjorn again.

Hate this pun? I have no reNorse.

Thor-ry (Not Thor-ry).

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Konamicoder
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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Vegetarian Viking

Does this belong here? Found in Youtube comments.

https://preview.redd.it/i31aosvjqlf41.png?width=377&format=png&auto=webp&s=1ea62e03ae60f061e3968e1f815fefe301e881bd

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustANormieGeek
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
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So I asked my Viking friend to write something nice in my autograph book.

But all he could do was rune it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shagminer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?

Its so they can scan-de-navien

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πŸ‘€︎ u/InnTheAbyss
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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Fact: Vikings are the sixth generation of kings.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iGandhi510
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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Did you know Vikings had a secrete language?

They called it Norse code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Poptarzan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
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When I tell my wife about a mean viking who likes water:

Rude Alf the Red knows rain, dear.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OiTheRolk
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
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What do you call a Viking prostitute?

A Leif blower.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VolsOrNothing
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes

There’s a disturbance in the Norse

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_solidwarp_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
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The Viking Tale of Bran Rudolph the Red.

There are many tales that have come from Viking lore but few are as lost as the tale of Bran Rudolph the Red.

It was said that he was blessed by God's with a keen ability to predict the weather. Due to this magical gift, he became a renowned seaman. Feared by his enemies, and respected by his bannermen. After years of successful raids and conquests, one of his shield maidens finally plucked up the courage and asked him how he does it.

"Bran, how do you always predict the weather? How have you always, managed to avoid every storm the sea throws at you". All his men laughed and looked up at their leader. Before he could respond, his right-hand man stood up and with a smile on his face and retorted, " It's simple. Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Birdman27
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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Who succeeded the Vikings?

The Z-kings

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πŸ‘€︎ u/stor_e_teller
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
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Where did the vikings dogs go after their death ?

Ballhala.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dermlvl
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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How did Viking sailors communicate?

Using Norse Code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JKent2017
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2017
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What do you call a viking graphic designer?

Rasterix

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrLazyTiger
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
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Why couldn't the viking clan replace the boat they lost?

They couldn't affjord it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lobsterbash
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
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I went to a club with friends. There was a huge nordic/viking looking ass bouncer He let us through looking intimidating as fuck but whatever. Dancing and drinking. This chick grinding on me. Getting flirty and introduce herself. Her name is Sky. Drag me to the toilet hinting she wants the D.

Sucks dick like a pro. Doesn't let me cum and wants me to eat her ass.

Suddenly huge bouncer from before barges in and shoves me away with an unrelenting force. Proceed eats out Sky's ass like a boss

Yells "Sky's rim belongs to the nords"

(sorry for long post but friend sent this to me and i have no idea where it goes, could use some help)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Death_Mark_Is_OP
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
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Was Henry VI a ViKing?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/donaloflynn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2018
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How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?

They have Valhallet parking

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cybot2001
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
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How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?

They use a Sven Diagram.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Targetsb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
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What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?

Valhalla Snackbar!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MayonnaiseUnicorn
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
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A Viking named Rudolph the Red

One night a viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, β€œIt’s going to rain.” His wife asked, β€œHow do you know?” He said, β€œBecause Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Tigger
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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A viking by the name of Rudolph the Red was sitting in his home, when he looked out the window.

He told his wife that it was going to rain soon. His wife, never hearing her husband predict the weather before asks, "How Rudolph, how do you know its going to rain soon?"

"Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pidgeon-eater-69
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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A Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said

β€œIt looks like it’s going to rain” his wife said how do you know?

He replied β€œRudolph the Red knows rain, dear....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pasd84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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One Night a Viking named Rudolph the Red told his wife, It’s going to Rain...she asked how he knew...

Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear

(Yes, I stole this from another sub:))

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DJBlue18
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Why did the viking buy an old boat ?

He couldn't a fjord a new one

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/engineerwho_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
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One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said "It's going to rain". His wife asked "how do you know?"

"Because rudolph the red knows rain, dear"

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TripHasard
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2018
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How did the Vikings send secret messages?

By using Norse code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pandacoat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
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A famous viking of the red clan came home one day and told his wife it's gonna rain tomorrow. She asked him how he knows. He told her:

Rudolf the red knows rain, dear!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/psayayayduck
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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How do Vikings send messages ?

With Norse Code!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frugatti_cuse
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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Vikings

Are the sixth generation of royalty

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stonefly_C
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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Did you hear about the viking Rudolph the Red?

He looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain. His wife questioned, "What makes you say that?" He replied, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/l3ahamut
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
🚨︎ report
What do Vikings use to encrypt their messages?

Norse code

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spooky-Bird
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
How did Vikings send secret messages?

They used norse code.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
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Looking out his window, a viking named Rudolph the Red declared, "It's going to rain."

His wife asked, "How do you know?"

"Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BassWizard420
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
🚨︎ report

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