Route Beer. Root Beer. Got it on Route 66. Nuff Said.
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagmarashiYT
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report
I was thinking of getting a job at the U.S. Mint

Can you imagine the amount of money I would make?

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShittySoraka
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25
🚨︎ report
2000’s kids are generation Z and 80’s-90’s kids are generation Y, if we keep going back we get to generation U.

If you have wine from that time is it genuine?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deaderson
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08
🚨︎ report
My dad operates a motel and cafe on Route 66

http://i.imgur.com/M0R9tHo.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xHaZxMaTx
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2014
🚨︎ report
Using only the letters L H U T S E, how do you tell an investigator to hurry up?

Hustle, Sleuth.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bentnotbroken96
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28
🚨︎ report
What happens when the U.S. Mint stops producing currency?

I don’t know, it makes no sense.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/samrf1202
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z

Happy No L!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Just watched an episode of 24 where Jack Bauer had to decide to either help the cartel transfer cannabis crystals into the U.S within 24 hours or they would blow up the Gulf Coast states.

...It was Kief or Southernland.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AquamarineCheetah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?

Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drigana
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a list of puns/bad jokes for every U.S. President reddit.com/gallery/jw48pr
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThackerOpinions
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?

Because they're all not 'C's.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedPlanetCorridor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
In an effort to combat climate change, the U.S. Army will no longer allow rabbits to drive vehicles.

This will eliminate 75% of America’s car bunny missions.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JiminyKirket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the opposite of a croissant?

A happy uncle.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kgangadhar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked for a divorce today, saying I was too un-American.

I saw it coming from a kilometer away.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that U.S. Mail is starting a freight delivery service to compete with FedEx and UPS?

It’s called β€œS Cargo”.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blizzardwizard88
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Apple Pie is a ridiculous $5 a slice in the U.S., but only $1 in Jamaica, the Bahamas, & the Virgin Islands

Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I couldn't figure out why the U.S. Mint wasn't working...

But then it started to make cents.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Funny-Promise956
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Which U.S. state is famous for its extra-small soft drinks??

Minnesota ! HA!

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/balkso
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
🚨︎ report
The mayor in my city just passed law that male best friends have to have lunch together at least once a week

Well it’s not a law it’s a mandate

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justin_true_10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb.

He just can't part with it.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeltaOne211
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
The U.S. Army is full of crybabies

That’s why we also call them the Infantry.

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know the film β€œSpeed” had no director?

If it had direction, it would be called β€œVelocity”.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Divine_ICBM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
The U.S. needs to stop selling pre-packaged shredded cheese!

Make America Grate Again!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sweetmonkeylove
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
In response to the American coin shortage, Canada has committed to providing the U.S. aid

They give us Nickelback

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SquireX
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
If there’s a line of gay people, it’s not a straight line...

It’s an LGBT Queue

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Evanthekid16
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
The U. S. Government legally believes in demons.

After all, possession is 9/10ths of the law.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madkins007
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the deal with people who get fired from the U.S. Mint?

None of them make cents anymore!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nickissupershort
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
(with thanks for encouragement from u/sherbert_suspicious): I built a little model sports car car for my snail, and called it an S-car for Snail.

Every where he drove it, people shouted "Look at that S-Car go!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IranRPCV
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What does u/username do when he hates the hotel he’s staying at?

Username checks out.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K?

HDMI

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Yovinio
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
*whispers* b i o l o g y p u n s . . .
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OCTUStudio
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
🚨︎ report
9 months from now, there will be a baby boom. 13 years later, will give rise to the next generation, known as....

Quaranteens.

πŸ‘︎ 602
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
A company with travelling salespeople had an accounting procedure...

There with a company with a lot of travelling salespeople, and they had an accounting procedure that was somewhat unusual. Since the salespeople were driving around a lot, they had to pay a lot of highway tolls. They would get reimbursed for this. Since these expenses were so common, and different from other expenses, they had a series of ceramic tiles that represented the amount of money they paid to take these highways. At the end of the day, after travelling their routes, they would come back and put them in the cash register and take money out to reimburse themselves. But the highways all raised their rates, and so the salespeople would come back with hands full of their tiles. So one Friday, after raised rates and very busy travel, the boss came in to look at the receptionist and her overloaded cash register. He asked her what was going on, and she said:

"The tall tiles in the till tell a tale of tall tolls"

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glowing-fishSCL
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
What do snowmen call their offspring?

Chill-dren

πŸ‘︎ 188
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πŸ‘€︎ u/90eight
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What is an appropriate age to tell my highway it's adopted?

I feel like the 66 route is a little late

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhiteWhenWrong
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Darth Vader's walking into a Chinese takeaway when he gets a call from the Emperor

"What is thy bidding, my master?" says Darth Vader.

"Order 66."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joelthomastr
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy

It's not like I did something

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sash_Mystq
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Ya know everyone seems to hate the U.S right now, but I honestly think it’s pretty

Sick

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LinguiniiL
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I won’t act like I’m not impressed
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/choshmo
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Best 'ice' puns. Go!

What are the best 'ice puns'? Trying to name a project in opposition to U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement, or ICE. Ideas needed. Thx in advance πŸ™πŸΌ Have a punderful day!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mnrqz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01
🚨︎ report
I saw the headline β€œTrump Attacks WHO chief Over Criticisms of U.S. Approach to Coronavirus” and thought...

What the hell did Pete Townshend do?!?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TreyBien875
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know SCUBA is an acronym for Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus? Did you know β€œtuba” is also an acronym?

Terrible Underwater Breathing Apparatus

Edit: good lord, I didn’t know someone else posted this previously. I thought it was funny as heck and my kids rolled their eyes when I told it SO THERE.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coolhandhutch
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Can I play World War Z without having played World War A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X and Y before? /r/ShouldIbuythisgame/com…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonaSavage17
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
🚨︎ report
We all need some octopuns in our life
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sweet-tooth05
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
censorship
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jeaners7n9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Why’s β€œU” used as the symbol for Potential Energy?

Because β€œU” have a lot of potential!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DenverCav0
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
From what state in the U.S. most computers come from?

Dellaware.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Danysco
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
🚨︎ report
More U.S. Presidents were born in Virginia than any other state.

I guess you could say it's a Prez dispenser.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RonPalancik
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
A little Christmas song. A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/December_Soul
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report

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