https://www.theonion.com/spacecraft-travel-from-all-over-galaxy-to-honor-end-of-1832602862
Oppy's adventures!
We were the first.
I still remembered the moment I'd gotten picked for the mission and the joy that had come with. I'd cried. My family had cried. My friends had cried. And yet it was still probably the best day of my life.
You don't just get picked for something like that and forget it.
The preparation had been brutal. No matter how many years I'd trained for it—all the years as a pilot, or as a consultant to other missions—I hadn't been ready for it. It had tested my strength, for sure, and my constitution as well. I still remembered the day that I'd almost quit right then and there.
I'd gotten so fed up, so confused by the deadlines, the training, the strain. I hadn't been able to see my family in weeks. I hadn't been able hang out with friends. I hadn't been able to do anything. Anything but train.
I remember the way I'd stormed off, right out of the NASA building with some of my equipment still on. None of them had stopped me, none of them had dared to do so. I'd been so fed up with their shit. And that was the day they told us that the mission was getting pushed back.
It made me smile now, the way I'd thought back then. I'd put in all that effort, just to have the mission delayed? It had seemed like a curse, like a criminal waste of my time. I'd promised to quit, to leave and never come back.
But god damn was I thankful that I'd lied back then.
We drove across the dunes, the red dust filling our vision. It pelted my helmet, blocking crucial parts of my vision at times, and even more crucial parts at others. But I didn't mind.
Jeane wiped the dust from her helmet, the grey fabric of her glove leaving a smudge on the glass. She needed to see where we were going. She was in the driver's seat after all.
Sitting in the passenger's seat beside her, I got all the luxuries of the trip. I didn't have to worry about such silly things as vision, or steering the buggy. I could just relish in the feeling of being there. I could get lost in my thoughts.
We were almost there.
I didn't know it for sure, I didn't have the directions, but I knew it in my heart. The little guy was out there, waiting just beyond the dust for us to come save him. If I tried hard enough—and pushed the scientist in me away for a bit—I could almost feel his presence. From the passenger's seat, I could just let that feeling guide the way. And I knew we'd arrive.
Opportunity was important, not just to me but to all of humanity. It was a glimpse into the past, a relic of anot
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The white bright sun is slowly sinking behind the far crimson mountain, scattering the last bits of its warm light all over the rusty rocks around me. I still remember the first time I tasted its ultraviolet flavoured rays spreading against my screens. It felt real and special, much better than the boring simulations in NASA.
I gathered the last bits of energy still flowing in my power lines, and barely climbed over a small pebble. Back in my first days, I’d jump the highest rocks with the least bit of care, but fifteen years is not a short time, and I can feel fatigue straining against my axes, causing me a strange feeling when I try to move. A feeling I lack enough intelligence to explain, but I can guess it’s what humans call pain. The sun is running down faster, and I still didn’t get the energy I need. I’m pushing myself to the highest spot, struggling to turn my screens towards her, but all in vain.
“ My batteries are low”
I hate to send these messages. Vandi always gets upset when she receives them, and I don’t want her to be sad. She guided me through the toughest times. My memory cards are already crumbling with all this rusty dust accumulating inside me throughout the long weary years, but I still clearly remember the joy I felt in the commands when she was driving me. They will tell you that a robot can’t feel, but believe me, I do, and I always felt happy when I got those commands from her.
I wish I didn’t have to send this message, but it’s my duty to inform. Poor Vandi. She would be worried. I remember the last time I sent her this message. She tried everything she could to stay in touch with me. I vaguely remember her commands, her begging and her prayers, but I do remember the joy when I finally recharged, and sent her the awesome view of the rusty sunset down the valley. The final rays of sunshine are fading away. I’m running with all my remaining power, but I’m too weak to move, and I feel the pain crushing my inner joints.
I’m tired.
I wish I can reach the sun before my batteries die. I know I’m very old already. I know I won’t be able to do all these cool tests that make Vandi happy anymore. I’m too crushed and bruised to jump on the craters and run between the huge rocks. But all I want is to sit there, on the top of the small cliff, to enjoy the lovely sunsets every night, and send Vandi a “Good Morning” every time I feel the slight warmth of the big yellow star after a long freezing night.
It’s getting
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, older than Helen Mar Kimball when she was married to prophet and noted pedophile, Joseph Smith, Jr.
Let us take a moment to think kind thoughts for the brave little rover that survived 58 times longer on Mars than it was expected to. And for the brave exmos that put up with more than 58 times the amount of bullshit they should have from the church.
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