Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

Because he drank coffee before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiosMioMan2
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the hipster burn his tongue on a piece of pizza?

He ate it before it was cool

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toku-Nation
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
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The world tongue twister champion just got arrested.

I heard they're going to give him a really tough sentence...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
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The O.Henry Pun-Off is back β€œON!” - Tongues of puns linger
  • Like all cherished things in this covid-crazy world, the O.Henry Museum’s famous free, family friendly celebration of the wit-in-word will take place virtually in cyberspace this year. With an awesome live cast of lively wits and tortured tongues, the online audience will be treated to all the linguistic twists, dramatic turns, and surprise endings they’ve groan to love. Expect to witness wacky word butchers and voracious verbivores from around the globe, all worming their way into your ears. Tongues of tradition, tension and camaraderie make this the premier event for the world's competitive wordplay community
  • Brought to you this year by the City of Austin, Brush Square Museums Foundation, and co- sponsored by Austin's very own Fantastic Magic Camp, as well as the internationally renowned podcast, Pun Intensive, The O. Henry Museum Pun-Off World Championships Punslingers Competition: Online Edition will commence Saturday, November 21, 2020
  • Preliminary live rounds begin Saturday, November 21, 2020, at 11:00am CST, lasting about 2 hours. Later that evening, live competition resumes at 7:00pm CST with head-to-head prime time heats. - See Pun-Off.com for schedule details, links, and more.

[Austin, TX, November 1, 2020] - Although traditionally held outdoors on a single day in the spring, the first portion 2020 the O. Henry Museum Pun-Off competition known as Punniest of Show was conducted via video in October. Now on Saturday, November 21, 2020, PARD will bring you their most popular second segment, O. Henry Museum Pun-Off World Championships Punslingers Competition: Online Edition

This free, fun, and family friendly event will take place online this year, but with special twists, turns, and surprise modifications to make it the perfect 2020 event for the world's competitive wordplay community.

The O. Henry Museum Pun-Off World Championships have been an Austin institution for 43 years. As usual, the contest will feature a cavalcade of word-class wordsmiths from across the globe, all worming their way into your art. Join and enjoy us as they compete to spontaneously spit out the most absurd words you’ve ever heard.

The event will be live streamed at PunIntensive.com.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bpcombs
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
A pun that really flows off the tongue
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sandbag747
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Norse god of thunder say after biting his tongue during an intense weight-lifting session?

Man, I'm thor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Police have arrested the world tongue-twister champion

If found guilty he'll be given a real tough sentence

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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Sitting in the ER with my son last night, he got me with this one. I was trying to lift his spirits and was pointing out all the crazy equipment they have in the room. I said "Oh look. They have tongue depressers." He says "Those won't work on me." I asked why and he says...

"I'm on antidepressants."

He's going in for surgery at 3:30pm Pacific. All your positive thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

Edit: Thank you all for the kind words and omg for the gold! He's out of surgery and looks to be recovering nicely. All your well wishes helped cheer him and his parents up.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebikerdad
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I recently tried on some new shoes and I told the salesman they felt a bit snug. He told me to try pulling the tongue.

β€œOK,” I said, β€œbuth I don’th know how thith will helpth”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mlucasr
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What made the tongue sad at the doctor’s office?

The doctor brought out the tongue depressor

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πŸ‘€︎ u/El-Waffle
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Could you imagine a metalworker who bites his tongue but then cannot quite place the metallic taste of his blood?

It's irony

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
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How did the tongue depressor get its name?

Because it stops your tongue from lolling.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FieryFruitcake
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I know the tongue of the shoes

Some say I Converse with them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpiderKnight68
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the plumber burn his tongue?

He always eats his food piping hot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Waiter: Our special of the day is beef tongue.

Customer: Ugh! I can’t eat anything out of an animal’s mouth. Give me a coupla eggs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpecOpsAlpha
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
🚨︎ report
Police have arrested the World tongue-twister Champion. reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/schmidt_1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2018
🚨︎ report
My Dad had this tongue shot off in the war

He never spoke of it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fourgeo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2017
🚨︎ report
I picked up some tongue depressors at the pharmacy today

& I'm happy to report that my tongue is still in relatively good spirits!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Of all parts of a cow, the tongue is the one that tastes the best...

This is due to the many taste receptors over it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DasFrettchen
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2017
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A Typical SLIP of the TONGUE imgur.com/7dJ4frc
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Neat_Chi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2013
🚨︎ report
Have you heard about the guy who speaks three tongues?

He talks like this like this like this.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vin_kaushik
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2017
🚨︎ report
At the La Brea tar pits: "He looks a little tongue tied!"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/heyitskateeeee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2013
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

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πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested.

I hear they're gonna give him a really tough sentence.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_kefir
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
🚨︎ report
The world tongue twister champion got arrested

I hear they are going to give a really tough sentence.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bonp27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Police have arrested the world tongue twister champion...

...they say he will be given a tough sentence

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πŸ‘€︎ u/evac95
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

Because he ate the pizza before it was cool 😎

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Police have arrested the world tongue-twister champion.

They said he'll be given a tough sentence.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
🚨︎ report
They recently arrested the world tongue twister champion

I imagine they'll give him a long sentence

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πŸ‘€︎ u/imagoblinshark
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He sipped his coffee before it was cool

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πŸ‘€︎ u/blamethedog16
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

He ate his breakfast before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/katayda13
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
🚨︎ report
The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested. I hear they’re gonna give him a really tough sentence.
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ashwinvias
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2018
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn their tongue?

Ate their meal before it was cool.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Binger
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Police have arrested the World tongue-twister Champion.

I imagine he'll be given a tough sentence.

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeevesPoltergist
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2018
🚨︎ report
How did the Hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RDS
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank coffee before it was cool

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcdee43
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ethanthememegod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the hippie burn his tongue?

He drank coffee before it was cool.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RikCooper
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He took a sip of his coffee before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BradyHoke
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2018
🚨︎ report
The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested

I hear they're gonna give him a really tough sentence.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paladium9999
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the hipster burn his tongue when he took a sip of his coffee?

He drank it before it was cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDankerGod
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the hipster burn his tongue...

He drank it before it was cool.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2016
🚨︎ report
How did the the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlopDonker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2015
🚨︎ report

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