The Day I Became a God Puns

Eternity with judgemental family who say I'm not good enough sounds like hell to me. Mormonism.... Sounds like Narcissistic Hell to me.

Like he's not just a good natured dumb dumb, he became a dumb dumb by resisting pure evil and a prophecy that would have put him in an alliance directly with hell.

's representative.

I didn't know where to post this and this sub seems appropriate, if it's not please let me know where to redirect myself to.

When I was 16 years old I never had a boyfriend and you know, it's highschool and everyone's talking about it, I felt like a loser and was desperate.

I was not religious in any way but I love Greek mythology, I decided it would be a good idea to pray Eros and Aphrodite.

A few weeks later I started getting letters from a secret admirer, it turned out to be a guy a year older than me from my same school that I had never seen before, he was nice but he was way more into me than I was with him.

Anyway, I'm 23 now and suddenly I keep thinking about it, I'm not religious in any kind but that didn't felt like a coincidence, we were together like 3 weeks and to this day he stills swears I was the love of his life, I honestly wasn't even a good girlfriend.

I truly believe that my prayer worked, but now what? Like I said, I'm not religious but I can't shake the feeling like I own something.

Please help.

Session Story Time!

We introduced a new player/PC into the session last night, a Cleric who is working for the Elf Princess the team is helping. Our wizard had to cancel last minute with left us with 4 people, 2 moon druids a firbolg sorceror and the new PC.

Worried about time constraints around reaching the BBEG and the Mcguffin in time they are pressing on and struggling to not get entangled in any of my various attempts to side quest them.

Off they go through an underused section of ancient road through a dark and very expensive forest ominous forest. As they leave the road to follow a trail to a large lake they are perplexed by footprints. Always found in sets of 3 they do not recognize what being would create them. As they follow the trail the path gets crossed with more footprints, always in sets of 3. They trudge on and eventually find the bank of the lake. Or where the lake WAS. it is now just a deep and wide (as far as the eye can see) muddy pit. Dozens of these footprints are marchinest towards the west, our party seeing no other option tries to cross the mudpit only its far too ooey gooey to cross. Our druid Molds Earth tirelessly for two hours to create a walkable surface to get halfway across the lake, where they see the scene of a battle with large fishy humanoids apparently having fought a large mound of mold? They stop for a rest. Tossing a few firebolts into the mound of mold seems to burn away the mold revealing something pink and squishy looking. Spooked, they hurriedly continue molding earth to move on. Just as they get around the massive mound (about an hour to get around it!) a section sloughs off, revealing a black glossy bit that looks delicious to our Lizardfolk druid, Stampy.

Being both intrigued, scared, and hungry from all his work he decides to overcook the damn thing. A full channel of Summon Lightning. 10 minutes of lighting strikes burns out the moss and reveals awkward looking organs and fluids flowing out into big chunks. Now extremely hungry, he starts to summon another storm, hoping to bake the mud into clay so he can walk up to the mound. As he begins this a weird WARBLE is heard in the distance... and then another... from all around. Dozens upon dozens of fish folk walk into site stopping a hundred feet or so from our party. THe lizardfolk immediately drops to his knees and throws his hands in the air.

So do the fish folk.

Except their leader who is on a palanquin who keeps WARBLE WARBLEING and doing

There were many national gods in the bronze age in the many kingdoms that existed there. But only the national god of the kingdoms of Israel (Samaria) and Judah became a monotheistic religion. So my question is: Why did this national god became a part of monotheistic religion and the others not?

I took 5gs blah blah you know, before i smoked I could literally let a ball run down my arms with perfect precision, and accuracy, a couple of friends tried to touch my shoulders, and I could basically do wing chun like a master. MY balance was perfect I felt like Nataraja the hinduin god of dance, i was free of thought letting muscle memory take over only seeing an infinity sign in my vision and becoming water.

Everything about the timing and placement of everything was exactly perfect, i would say "wheres my water" and instantly it would inter my reality; same thing with many other things.

When I smoked the joint my vision became fractalized, and i could be anything, and anyone. I was a perfect actor my accents were on point, I had this weird meme thing in my head about how I was new age Steve jobs, Its hard to deny how cliche my life is for a movie or something (I cant think of another example) I was voted wittiest in my school, and am currently dating voted most beautiful (who happens to have everything i've been looking for) and basically stole her from the douche voted as most handsome (My rival) Everyone in my life is exactly how they should be impacting exactly right to make me this "enlightened person" at one point i said out loud "this must be a setup or something" I truly believe if I stick to my principals and stay true to my morals ill continue down this path of divinity, and accomplishment. My name is Jonah Brodbeck if you see me one day on the tonight show, or on the headline for creating something that'll change the world, know that fate is real, and shrooms show you the way. To me this all sounds big headed, and futile to post. Believe me when I say i have no egotistical goal from posting this, I have become finally dedicated to my life, and have no plans on falling below what i'm capable of. Okay lemme wrap this all up... I think watching people do things on Youtube etc. is the equivalent of practice, like how in the matrix they injected leo with "kung fu" sounds far out I know, however today was proof of this thought (Wish i had a recording, you can believe me or not idc) . Love, and acceptance of yourself and others is my idea of the meaning of life; truly try to be in someone elses shoes and you'll soon forget your own desires giving only positive energy to the world. Forget the things you want, and focus on the things you need. This doesn't come close to all the wisdom and truth i want to share, once i'm rested maybe the thought

It is about the story of a freelancer who got transported into the first video game he has developed. Because he knew every events, dialogues and attack patterns (even the random ones) people started believing he is an incarnation of their god, which is technically correct, and asked him to save their world from the scenario he wrote.

Our main character is overpowered because of his knowledge of the game and its glitches, not because he is some sort of ‘chosen one’.

(btw he can’t use console commands because he has no keyboard)