My friend got a new job removing italics from reader correspondence at the local paper...

He gets to right letters to the editor.

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📅︎ Nov 06 2019
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Whoever figured out the 'days of the month correspond with your knuckles' thing had too much time on their hands
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👤︎ u/BradC
📅︎ Jan 26 2017
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Best Liam Neeson pun

Liam Neeson is a huge movie star. He is so busy filming and traveling that he rarely checks his correspondence. One day, he goes to the post office so he can receive all his letters and a mailman asks him to sign a check out sheet. As Liam reads the paper, he notices something odd: right next to his name, the mailman wrote his name backwards. When asking why, the mailman replies: "it's not your name, sir, it's just that since you rarely come here, you haven't seen your mail before and I just wrote it down as a note".

And he was right, for Liam Neeson had "no seeN maiL".

The end.

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👤︎ u/IsVigil
📅︎ Apr 20 2017
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Three Types of Liars

A good liar believes her lie as she tells it.

A mediocre liar believes something, as she talks, and pretends that her words correspond to that something.

A bad liar thinks of the truth as she lies against it.


X-post from /r/OCPoetry

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👤︎ u/justonium
📅︎ May 21 2016
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My wife said that she needed to address the envelopes...

Me: Ah, yes, let me help you with that. Turning to stack of envelopes "Your Grace, Earl of Envelopia, I have come to address you regarding the matter of correspondence you have graciously offered to assist in..."

Wife: ...Our son isn't even HERE, and he won't understand that for another 5 years anyway.

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👤︎ u/Lereas
📅︎ Oct 14 2014
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