Whats the best time on a clock?

6:30, hands down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iLoveRaviolis
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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Before the clock strikes midnight on december 31st be sure to lift your left leg

That way you will start off the new year on the right foot

πŸ‘︎ 198
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πŸ‘€︎ u/noodlesvonsoup
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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Just saw that joke about eating a clock for the umpteenth time. Finally decided to try eating a clock myself, but now I'm freaking out.

I think I picked up a nervous tic.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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Why did The conservative get rid of his alarm clock?

Because every morning it wanted him to get woke

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/piccolorick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
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The most important thing to me is my alarm clock

It’s what gets me out of bed in the morning

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saucyminnow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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Why did the clock get fat?

It kept going for seconds.

πŸ‘︎ 198
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πŸ‘€︎ u/static612
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
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Just found myself with problems in the bathroom as the clock struck 12...

Same shit, new year

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DantheMan350V2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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Did you hear about the new song by Olivia Newton John about clocks?

Let's get digital, digital.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gingasnappaz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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My wife didn’t like my idea to market a line of belts with little clocks built into the buckle.

She said it was a waist of time.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DingoWelsch
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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What Happens If You Are Sitting on the Toilet at 11:59 and the Clock Strikes Midnight?

Same shit, different day.

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AstrosAtoZ
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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What is the downside to eating a clock?

It's time consuming.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcc98
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
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I took my Clock to see the doctor

one arm is shorter than the other

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
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The longest hand on a clock is always the oldest

Because it's second hand

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jacksonrr3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
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What does the clock do when it’s hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Droolingdogg
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
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What did the tick say to the clock?

What are you tocking about?

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rick--Diculous
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
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Have I not yet told you my summary about the history of clocks?

Well, it's about time.

πŸ‘︎ 83
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustHumanGarbage
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
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You know the worst thing about eating clocks?

It's so time consuming

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fractalrain39
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2020
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What did they call the London clock tower after it started leaning off to the side?

Big Ben Dover.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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I'm in the process of adjusting the clocks in my house

Now all my rooms but the kitchen sync.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FunMathematician1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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Dwayne the Clock Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evansonly
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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Why was the clock not worried after getting an arm amputation?

Because it had a second hand.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_Aarsh
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
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Finally finished my huge book on the history of clocks.

It's about time.

πŸ‘︎ 90
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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My wife was disappointed with the castle shaped clock I bought for her birthday....

But it’s the fort that counts.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wavepoolsquad
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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I predict clocks will take over the world.

It’s only a matter of time.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TedBettridge
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
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People keep talking about eating clocks here, so I decided to eat one too while I was in line at the DMV.

Sure enough, my weight went up by several minutes.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2020
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why was the clock afraid it would get sick?

because its hands were constantly touching itsΒ face

πŸ‘︎ 153
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emotionalhaircut
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
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What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?

Look, no hands!

πŸ‘︎ 221
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
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Bob Dylan came to my house the day after Daylight Savings and adjusted all of my clocks.

He said the times they were a-changin’.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bjlind718
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
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A clock is the most likely object to get corona

because it always has its hands on it's face

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thatsgregbuddy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
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I looked at the clock earlier and it read 1:44

That's gross.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AtTheKevIn
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Make sure that your left leg is up before the clock hits midnight tomorrow.

That way you start 2021 on the right foot.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaddyRecon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Before the clock strikes midnight on December 31st be sure to lift your left leg.

That way you will start the new year off on the right foot.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OwenJthomas89
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the best time on the clock?

6:30. Hands down!!

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aakashrajaraman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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What is the downside to eating a clock

Its time consuming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leoniscute
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the downside to eating a clock?

It's time consuming

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wornsy21
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
6:30 is the best time on a clock

Hands down.

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
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What’s the downside of eating a clock?

It’s very time consuming.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ryaton13
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the downside of eating a clock?

It's time consuming

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PartyProNL
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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What did the tick say to the clock

what are you tocking about

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlastBroFrenzyMan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the downside to eating a clock

It’s time consuming

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wwe22_andrew
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
🚨︎ report
6:30 is the best time on the clock

Hands down

πŸ‘︎ 790
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fmlolika
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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I was sitting on the toilet at 11:59 p.m. and noticed the clock turn to midnight.

I thought, β€œSame shit. Different day.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the downside to eating a clock?

It's time consuming (Joel's joke from TLOU2)

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ukamii1337
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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What’s the best time on a clock?

6:30 hands down

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nord-The-Axolotl
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What does the clock do when it's hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
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Why did the man stop eating clocks?

Because it was too time consuming.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/extremeavYT
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the best time on a clock?

6:30, hands down.

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vassarlb
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I was sitting on the toilet having a poop when the clock struck midnight

Same shit, different day

πŸ‘︎ 151
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlashHash
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
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