Flower

When the ugliest kid in class gets a flower from someone for valentines. What in carnation!?

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/NOM1001
📅︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my wife after Medieval Times

The other night, my wife and I went to this corporate outing at Medieval Times with work. For those who don't know, it's a pretend jousting tournament with a bunch of food and no silverware unless you ask for it. The Knights also ride around on horseback and try to keep everyone involved and have a good time.

So one of the things they do, is give a 'favor' to to people in the audience. Typically, pretty ladies and little girls. My wife got such a favor (carnation). Gave her some mock jealousy, and our evening continued.

So on and our way home, I asked:

"So, how was your night? "

" It was pretty good. "

" Good. How about your evening? "

She's still glaring at me, three days later.

👍︎ 32
💬︎
📅︎ May 02 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad to my daughters this morning at breakfast....

Q: Do you know what you would have if every car in the u.s. was pink? A: A pink carnation

Q: What does a cat in the desert and Christmas have in common? A: SandyClaws

Q: What do a plum and an elephant have in common? A: They're both purple except for the elephant.

Q: Do you know how you get down from an elephant? A: You don't... You get down from a goose.

Q: How do you if an elephant has been hiding in your fridge? A: there are footprints in the cheesecake.

There were dozens more....

👍︎ 59
💬︎
📅︎ Oct 19 2013
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.