A list of puns related to "The 300 Spartans"
Instead of facing Xerxe the Spartans must face the army of Thanos we see in Endgame. Takes place in Thermopylae just like the movie 300 with the Spartans protecting it. The Spartans get vibranium weapons from Wakanda this time. Thanos himself will not join the fight but Leonidas can still negotiate with him.
300 Spartan hoplites fight 300 present day US Marines with identical hoplite armor and weapons (armor fits the Marines as well as the Spartans' armor fits them, even if average height is different).
Historically accurate hoplites.
Marines have had 24 hours to get used to their equipment.
Victory condition is rout or capture/kill all of the other side.
Everyone is bloodlusted.
R1: fight takes place on a flat plain
R2: takes place on Spartan home turf
R3: takes place in an evacuated downtown New York City
So the Persian army of Xerxes from the movie version of 300 gets replaced by Daenerys army, minus dragons of course. For the purposes of this battle we will assume 100,000 Dothraki and 50,000 Unsullied plus 7,000 Iron Born.
The Spartans are just as seen in the movie 300. Great strategy, amazing battlefield knowledge and no fear. They are armed with spears and metal shields, which are bulletproof from 9mm rounds and regular rifle ammunition, but not from .50 cal and close range .44 magnum.
The ten Americans are regular people, just with an excessive amount of guns at home. Everyone owns at least one handgun and one semi-automatic rifle. Seven of them owns a shotgun and a heavy revolver. Five of them have fully automatic rifles. One guy owns a .50 caliber sniper rifle. They also have a huge amount of ammunition of different kinds, scopes, laser sights and suppressors. They have two grenades.
The Americans are defending a large barn where the only copy of the second amendment is stored for some reason. The barn is out on an semi-open field, with some trees, rocks, hills and other debris around. The Americans will fight until they die if needed.
The Spartans are attacking with the goal to kill every American and take the second amendment.
Who would win?
Round 1: 300 Spartans led by King Leonidas vs 300 Silvan Elves led by King Thranduil and his son Legolas
Round 2: 300 Spartans vs 300 Dwarves of the Iron Hills led by King DΓ‘in and Thorin
Round 3: 300 Spartans vs the Gundabad's army led Azog and Bolg
location: Thermopylae, the Spartan are the defender
Bonus Round: 10,000 Spartans joins the "Battle of the Five Armies", allying with no one
Forget about the history for one second and let's go with just the characters from the movie and TV series.
The 300 Spartans are led by King Leonidas. They are battle hardened warriors who have been training since birth for a glorious death. They can either fight as a unit in the phalanx formation or individually among hordes of enemies. They fought the very best of Xerxes's army including hundreds of infantry units and special units such as the immortals, armored rhinos, war elephants, magicians and many other creatures. It is said that during the first few days of battle against Xerxes, the Spartans took 0 casualties. Meanwhile Spartacus was a slave captured by the Romans who was forced to train to become a gladiator. He worked up the ranks and eventually became a battle hardened warrior and champion of the arena. Spartacus managed to kill a mythical creature himself - Theokoles. He now commands an army of gladiators skilled in guerrilla warfare. He is supported by his friends and other gods of the arena - Crixus, Gannicus, and Oenomaus who can take on many men by themselves. Spartacus is also a very tricky and skilled tactician utilizing the terrain to his advantage. Behind them they have a trained gladiator army of ~30,000. Many sources say 120,000 but that includes women and children and the TV series never really clarifies so let's say 30,000 fully fledged Spartacus styled gladiators vs the mighty 300 Spartans.
Both can pull off some really sick acrobatic moves, leap a bunch of feet into the air, kill a bunch of enemies in mere seconds in slow motion, and splatter a bunch bright red blood onto the screen really quick BUT WHO WINS?
ROUND 1: Both attacking each other on an open plain battlefield.
ROUND 2: Spartacus assaulting the defending Spartans at the pass of Thermopylae.
ROUND 3: The Spartans assault Spartacus and his fortifications in the last episode of War of the Damned on a battlefield. These fortifications include spike pits, archers, and catapults.
BONUS ROUND 4: Spartacus army joins the 300 Spartans in their fight against Xerxes army. Can they turn the tide and win?
BONUS ROUND 5: 300 Spartans join Spartacus army in their fight against Marcus Crassus and his 50,000 Roman Legions at the end of show. Can they turn the tide and win?
The soldiers can use any modern personal armor or melee weapons so long as they don't have any source of power. No ranged weapons allowed. They don't know about the goat path and can't flank the Spartans.
Spartans are historically accurate and in full hoplite armor.
Bob From Carbotanimations (its the raging zealot)
Bob and his "friends" run on carbot logic
Round 1
Alone has and the high ground
Round 2
He has 4 sentries, 4 shield batteries and 2 medivacs as allies in a chokehold
Round 3
there's about 21 more zealots
Round 4
he has 1 colossus and 2 disruptors and 2 sentries
Bonus
the combined might of a 100 vikings, 300 spartans, 100 knights and a hundred samurais
vs
A literal protoss death ball Consists of 2 immortals ,1 archon, 2 high templars, bob, a colossus, 4 sentries and and 8 stalkers
Hello All, I am your 300 Goddess, Threethena. If your number is 300 you are able to join my beautiful aristocracy of wines, grapes and cheese. All the cheese you can eat.
I also have a Blue Pet Elephant. Please don't touch him hes sensitive.
I am currently reading Herodotus. And in it, he specifically mentions that he has learned the name of each of the 300 Spartans that died in the battle. But (after the main part of the force had withdrawn) there were also the Thebans and the Thespians fighting as well.
Why is it that there is so much glory for the Spartans and not these other people that fought to the death alongside of them?
Also, sorry for any facts I may have wrong or have misinterpreted.
The ol' Battle of Thermopylae, except zombies.
Who wins?
The mighty Spartans and their heavy armor and Phallanx formation VS an unending wave of persian zombies.
Let's assume the Spartans understand a Zombie needs to suffer terminal brain damage in order to not rise again.
Cesarβs army at the EOS.
R1: The Spartans are traveling through open terrain when they cross paths with Cesarβs army. Not fond of the looks of a army of chimps they fight it out
R2: The Spartans are traveling through a forest- with trees spaced out roughly every few feet so thereβs still enough room to maneuver. They cross into Cesarβs territory-which Cesar doesnβt like.
R3: They meet in the same battlefield as the 300 Spartans fought in real life.
Who wins?
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