Sean Levert Puns

Incredible. The man has done so much with so little draft capital.

There have been rumors of a possible expansion, so let’s imagine it does happen, but the NBA decides to only add one new team to the league (sorry Vegas), bringing back the beloved Seattle Supersonics. The Sonics are back babbyyyyyyyy!

Now the Sonics need to build their team from ground up, starting with the expansion draft, and following it with signing players in the off-season.

Here are some simplified terms of the expansion draft:

1. All 30 NBA teams will have the right to protect 8 players on their roster. Anyone on the current roster is protectable, including restricted free agents. If a restricted free agent is left unprotected by his former team, he is available for selection by the Supersonics, who would then hold his Bird Rights for the up-coming off-season. Teams will typically have 4-7 players unprotected. Unrestricted free agents can neither be protected from nor selected in the expansion draft -- they are essentially ignored.
   Players who are likely to be left unprotected by their former teams include aging, overpaid veterans, unproven bench players, players who do not fit in financially with their team, or who disrupt team chemistry.
2. The Sonics may only select 1 player per team.
3. The Sonics must work within 2/3 of the normal rules of the NBA salary cap, so there will be salary-related restrictions which apply to the team's selections. The team’s salary cap for the 2022-2023 season will only be 2/3 of the league cap (112.414 million), meaning 74.93 million. The minimum team salary is also 2/3 of the leagues' minimum team salary (101.173 million), meaning 67.449 million.
   The expansion draft occurs after the conclusion of the 2022 NBA Finals, but prior to the 2022 NBA Draft. The Sonics do not participate in the lottery, but automatically get the 5th and the 35th pick of the draft.
4. There are no restrictions on player positions during the draft.
5. The Sonics must select at least 14 players.
6. Here is a list of the players that each NBA team are, in my opinion, likely to protect, and a list of those who may be left unprotected (not all players are listed, but most of them, and all that have any chance of being drafted by an expansion team):

Atlanta Hawks:

Protected:

1. Trae Young
2. John Collins
3. Clint Capela
4. Kevin Huerter
5. De’Andre Hunter
6. Onyeka Okongwu
7. Bogdan Bogdanovic
8. Cam Reddish

Unprotected (Salary this year, Years left on the contract)

1. Jalen Johnson (2.6 million, 3 years)

General Information

Starting lineups

Inactive

Officials

Score

Reddit Stream (You must click this link from the comment page.)

#Projected Starters Pacers
• PG - Malcolm Brogdon OUT
• SG - Caris LeVert
• SF - Justin Holiday
• PF - Domantas Sabonis OUT
• C - Myles Turner

Rockets
• PG - Armoni Brooks
• SG - Eric Gordon
• SF - Garrison Mathews
• PF - Jae'Sean Tate
• C - Christian Wood

#Injuries

Pacers
• Malcolm Brogdon – OUT Questionable (Sore Right Achilles)
• T.J. McConnell - Out (Wrist Surgery Recovery)
• T.J. Warren – Out (Left Foot Stress Fracture)

Rockets
• Jalen Green - Questionable (Left Hamstring Strain)
• Christian Wood - Questionable (Left Knee Tendinitis)
• Kevin Porter Jr. - Out (Left Thigh Contusion)

I tweeted this in jest earlier but I wanted to look back at all of Sean Marks' drafting since he came in to the league.

He became Nets GM in earlier 2016 (bye Billy King)

2016:

Nets had... one pick, #55 in the 2nd round. They took Marcus Paige. Not a win? Except a draft-day trade sent Paige + 3M to the Utah Jazz for Isaiah Whitehead, who became a rotational player for a while. HOWEVER, they later traded Thaddeus Young for Caris Levert. IIRC, the trade was agreed to before the deal, but officially didn't go through until a month later.

2017:

1.22: Jarrett Allen, who became a starting center with the Nets, and later became a central part of the Harden trade. Has since become a borderline All-Star center for the Cavs.

1.27: Kyle Kuzma - this pick was part of the Brook Lopez/D'Angelo Russell trade. Kuzma has become a good NBA player with the Lakers and then the Wiz. DLo obviously became a big guy for us and eventually led to us acquiring this guy named Kevin Durant.

2.27: Sasha Vezenkov who I think is still in Europe but the Nets have his rights. Whatever.

2018:

1.29: Dzanan Musa, a inconsistent shooting guard who ended up going to Detroit in the Bruce Brown trade.

2.40: Rodion Kurucs, a fan-favorite for a while, he kinda faded but was a part of the Harden trade. Ended up on the Bucks after a bit, was waived. Did he get a ring?

2.45: Hamidou Diallo, was traded after a month to get Timofy Mosgov's contract off our books. He actually became a nice NBA player for the Pistons.

2019:

1.17: Nickell Alexander-Walker, he was actually a Net for about a month before going to Atlanta in the Taurean Prince trade

1.27: Mfiondu Kabengele, he was traded to the Clippers the next day for a future pick which became Saddiq Bey (not for the Nets obviously)

2.31: Nicolas Claxton - starting center for the Nets, high potential, limited by injuries but obviously a good pick

2020:

1.19: Saddiq Bey, who was traded to in a big deal which ended up with Landry Shamet on the Nets

2.55: Jay Scrubb, part of the above deal

2021, possibly his piece de resistance:

1.27: Cam Thomas, legit bench scorer with ceiling of much more

2.44: Kessler Edwards, already looking like a legit 3-D guy

2.49: Marcus Zagarowski, in the G-League, Nets still have his rights I think

2.59: RaiQuan Gray, same as Zagarowski, I remember this guy has some skills but has big weight issues, lottery ticket

Note: the Shamet/Jevon Carter trade also got us DayRon Sharpe, who has become a rotational bi

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

[Removed]

There hasn't been a post all year!

You take away their little brooms

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me my jokes aren't stale

It was about a weak back.

⬆️ if your players are feeling 🔥🔥🔥 tonight!

NOTABLE PERFORMANCES:

Rudy Gobert

Caris LeVert

Pascal Siakam

Russell Westbrook

Evan Mobley

FAQ

How are players ranked?

Stats are ranked SYSTEMATICALLY based on 9cat H2H performance.

Why is my player not on the list?

First, this does not mean your player performed poorly, it just means there were other players with more BALANCED performance. In 9cat, efficiency and scarcity matters a lot.

🍻

FiveThirtyEight has a player projection model they use to decide how good a player might be. Using the rosters listed from each team on ESPN (which may not be completely up-to-date), I wrote down what it had to say about each prospect .

Atlanta Hawks

• Trae Young - Future All-Star
• Bogdan Bogdanovic - Borderline All-Star
• Clint Capela - Borderline All-Star
• John Collins - Up-and-Comer
• Kevin Huerter - Up-and-Comer
• Delon Wright - Key Role Player
• Danilo Gallinari - Rotation Player
• Gorgui Dieng - Rotation Player
• De'Andre Hunter - Rotation Player
• Skylar Mays - Rotation Player
• Onyeka Okongwu - Rotation Player
• Cam Reddish - Rotation Player
• Lou Williams - Offensive Specialist
• Solomon Hill - Scrub
• Brandon Goodwin - Scrub
• Jalen Johnson - Good Prospect
• Sharife Cooper - Good Prospect
• A.J. Lawson - Marginal Prospect

Boston Celtics

• Jayson Tatum - All-Star
• Jaylen Brown - Borderline All-Star
• Marcus Smart - Borderline All-Star
• Dennis Schroder - Average Starter
• Al Horford - Key Role Player
• Josh Richardson - Rotation Player
• Jabari Parker - Rotation Player
• Aaron Nesmith - Rotation Player
• Enes Kanter - Rotation Player
• Romeo Langford - Rotation Player
• Payton Pritchard - Rotation Player
• Robert Williams III - Rotation Player
• Grant Williams - Defensive Specialist
• Luke Kornet - Defensive Specialist
• Juancho Hernangomez - Scrub
• Bruno Fernando - Project
• Juwan Morgan - Project
• Juhann Begarin - OK Prospect
• Sam Hauser - Marginal Prospect

Brooklyn Nets

• James Harden - MVP Candidate
• Kevin Durant - Borderline All-Star
• Kyrie Irving - Borderline All-Star
• Nicolas Claxton - Up-and-Comer
• Joe Harris - Average Starter
• Patty Mills - Rotation Player
• Blake Griffin - Rotation Player
• DeAndre' Bembry - Rotation Player
• Bruce Brown - Rotation Player
• Jevon Carter - Rotation Player
• Timothe Luwawu‑Cabarrot - Rotation Player
• Paul Millsap - Scrappy Veteran
• LaMarcus Aldridge - Way Past His Prime
• James Johnson - Scrub
• Tyler Johnson - Scrub
• Mike James - Scrub
• Sekou Doumbouya - Project
• Reggie Perry - Project
• Day'Ron Sharpe - Good Prospect
• Kessler Edwards - OK Prospect
• David Duke Jr - Marginal Prospect
• RaiQuan Gray - Marginal Prospect
• Marcus Zegarowski - Marginal Prospect

Charlotte Hornets

• LaMelo Ball - Future All-Star
• Miles Bridges - Average Starter
• Terry Rozier - Average Starter
• P.J. Washington - Average Starter
• Gordon Hayward - Rotation Player
• Kelly Oubre Jr. - Rot

Welcome to today's edition of the NBA Full Court Press! You have to start your research somewhere, and oftentimes going game by game and breaking down every matchup and its key players is the first step in our process. And now, today's breakdown!

Main Slate Breakdown for NBA DFS 12/23:

Houston Rockets @ Indiana Pacers

Vegas Total: 220.5

Vegas Spread: Ind -8.5

Starting with the Rockets, it should be hard for them to keep up here in this one without KPJ, but Christian Wood had a solid performance last night and he should carry this offense. Jae’Sean Tate would be the main beneficiary if he were to miss as he was a GTD last night and they’re on the 2nd half of a B2B. Eric Gordon has been playing big minutes as well but the production hasn’t been great. Armoni Brooks has been starting at PG for them and should continue to do so. Josh Christopher is a guy I like coming off the bench for them as well as he is still pretty cheap on both sites. Lastly, if you want to take the risk, Alperen Sengun would also see some solid minutes if Christian Wood were to miss, but he has burned us before.

Now for the Pacers, Malcolm Brogdon exited last game with that achilles issue, so I see him missing tonight which would open up some value in the form of Brad Wanamaker as TJ is still out. This will be a nice boost to both Domantas Sabonis and Myles Turner as their usage increase the most when he is out. Caris LeVert would also see a slight increase and he is fairly cheap on both sites as well. If you’re looking for value, Justin Holiday has been starting the last few games, and Chris Duarte is also in play as well.

5-star play: Domantas Sabonis

4-star play: Christian Wood, Jae’Sean Tate, Eric Gordon, Caris LeVert

Deeper Value: Josh Christopher, Alperen Sengun, Justin Holiday, Brad Wanamaker

GPP Sleeper: Brad Wanamaker

New Orleans Pelicans @ Orlando Magic

Vegas Total: 208.5

Vegas Spread: Nop -5

Starting with the Pelicans, Jonas Valanciunas has already been ruled out tonight, so this makes Willy Hernangomez a premier play as he should destroy thisMagic frontcourt with all the injuries they have. Brandon Ingram has also been on a tear the past few games and this Magic defense is bleeding FPs at every position. Devonte’ Graham is also seeing big minutes and producing, as has Josh Hart who played 42 minutes last night and is pretty cheap everywhere. Herbert Jones will also see an increased role with JoVal out and if you’re looking to get really dif

Atlanta Hawks:

Trae Young - 37

John Collins, Bogdan Bogdanovic - 10

Danilo Gallinari, De'Andre Hunter, Clint Capela - 4

Cam Reddish - 2

Onyeka Okongwu - 1

Charlotte Hornets:

Terry Rozier - 24

Gordon Hayward - 12

LaMelo Ball - 9

Devonte' Graham - 8

Miles Bridges - 7

P.J. Washington - 6

Malik Monk - 4

Bismack Biyombo, Jalen McDaniels - 1

Miami Heat:

Jimmy Butler - 25

Bam Adebayo - 18

Kendrick Nunn - 12

Tyler Herro - 8

Duncan Robinson - 6

Goran Dragic - 2

Precious Achiuwa - 1

Orlando Magic:

Nikola Vucevic - 30

Terrence Ross - 7

Cole Anthony, Evan Fournier, Chuma Okeke, Wendell Carter Jr., Mo Bamba, Dwayne Bacon - 4

Aaron Gordon, R.J. Hampton - 3

Markelle Fultz, Gary Harris, James Ennis, Moe Wagner, Ignas Brazdeikis - 1

Washington Wizards:

Bradley Beal - 46

Russell Westbrook - 17

Rui Hachimura - 3

Davis Bertans, Raul Neto, Robin Lopez, Thomas Bryant, Alex Len, Garrison Matthews - 1

Chicago Bulls:

Zach LaVine - 44

Nikola Vucevic - 10

Coby White - 7

Lauri Markkanen - 5

Thaddeus Young - 3

Patrick Williams - 2

Otto Porter Jr. - 1

Cleveland Cavaliers:

Colin Sexton - 45

Andre Drummond - 8

Darius Garland - 7

Isaac Okoro - 3

Jarrett Allen, Kevin Love - 2

Javale McGee, Dean Wade, Larry Nance Jr., Cedi Osman, Taurean Prince - 1

Detroit Pistons:

Jerami Grant - 35

Josh Jackson - 11

Wayne Ellington, Saddiq Bey - 5

Frank Jackson, Hamidou Diallo - 3

Saben Lee, Delon Wright, Isaiah Stewart - 2

Derrick Rose, Blake Griffin, Cory Joseph, Killian Hayes - 1

Indiana Pacers:

Malcolm Brogdon - 22

Domantas Sabonis - 18

Caris LeVert - 13

Doug McDermott - 5

Myles Turner - 4

Justin Holiday, Victor Oladipo, Aaron Holiday, Oshae Brissett - 2

T.J. Warren, Kelan Martin - 1

Milwaukee Bucks:

Giannis Antetokounmpo - 50

Khris Middleton - 8

Jrue Holiday - 7

Jordan Nwora, Brook Lopez - 2

Donte DiVincenzo, Thanasis Antetokounmpo, Bryn Forbes - 1

Boston Celtics:

Jayson Tatum - 36

Jaylen Brown - 24

Kemba Walker - 9

Evan Fournier, Semi Ojeleye, Jabari Parker - 1

Brooklyn Nets:

Kyrie Irving - 27

Kevin Durant - 18

James Harden - 16

Joe Harris - 4

Caris LeVert, Jeff Green, Landry Shamet - 2

Alize Johnson - 1

New York Knicks:

Julius Randle - 45

R.J. Barrett - 11

Immanuel Quickley - 6

Alec Burks - 5

Derrick Rose - 2

Kevin Knox, Austin Rivers, Elfrid Payton - 1

Philadelphia 76ers:

Joel Embiid - 37

Tobias Harris - 19

Shake Milton - 6

Ty