Apparently he has a reptile dysfunction.
So tonight my boyfriend, roommate and I are watching Wreck it Ralph with some friends. We're about a half an hour in and we are at the scene right before Venelope throws the medal into the funnel thing(?). King Candy is currently throwing candy to the audience members who are made out of candy.
Guy Friend: Wait. So. They're made out of candy, but King Candy is giving them candy to eat???
Boyfriend: Yeah. They're candybals.
Roommate and I dissolve into a fit of giggles.
My Wife: Is it frozen? Me: No, it’s Wreck It Ralph.
She’s 19 weeks pregnant, I can feel the dad joke wit rising!
My dad works on the 7th floor (of a 7 floor office building) and I work on the 5th. However, a guy quickly got into the elevator since he didn't want to wait for the next one. The guy chooses the 3rd floor and gets off when it's his floor. My dad looks at me and says "I didn't want to say anything but this elevator is quite odd today."
I was walking past a bookstore with my father in law today. He looked in the window and saw a display of books that featured Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison. My FIL said, "I tried reading Invisible Man years ago and I don't know, I just couldn't... I didn't really..." He struggled for words.
"You couldn't see the point?" I prompted with a grin.
He continued on for a moment till he saw me wagging my eyebrows and it hit him. I feel like I made him proud.
"Will it be called Defrosted?"
I'd love to see Brexit Ralph.
Everybody wearing Polo, Nike, Ralph Lauren, ect. was killed. After the cops came the they found one survivor and asked him " How'd you survive son?"
"I was wearing under-armor" he replied.
