That was a trip down memory lane.
David Lee Broth
But it wasn't Stroganoff
"There was a sail."
Sherlock and Watson were slowly making their way across the foggy moonlit moors, searching for what they think will be someone recently killed. Watson yells, " Sherlock, come here! I see a body!" As Sherlock approached, it was a gruesome scene...the man's shirt was ripped off, a knife cut from his sternum all the way to his belt line...and his guts pulled out and piled on top of him. Watson speaks, "I've never seen such a thing...what do you make of it?" Sherlock took a few puffs from his pipe and said.....
" Why, it's alimentary, my dear Watson."
No more mist an' ice guy.
Pinot Moor
He returned the next morning to find the line still there, but the ship had foundered. Clearly his barque was worse than his bight.
Honestly, I’m feeling a lot of pier pressure.
They docked his pay.
If you take cabbage and mix it with mayonnaise you get a nice salad.
Think a glen.
When an eel bites your hand, and that's not what you planned, That's a moray.
When paternity tests, lead to ratings success, that’s a Maury.
When our habits are strange, and our customs deranged, That's our mores.
When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.
When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?
When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.
When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?
When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?
When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!
In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.
Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.
A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.
When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.
When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?
But Canadians protest, underrepresented in jest, what’s one more, eh?
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(Repost of mine from over a year ago. Sorry. I remembered it while stoned and it was funny again. Credit to u/weizguy74 for the Maury line.)
he walked into a bra
She didn't like it.
They all share a bond
Pilgrims
She didn't make it after all...
Not sure if it really counts as a dad joke, but my dad just dropped this one on me.
Apparently his mooring had broken.
RIP Mary Tyler No-Moore.
I said soon he will be swimming on his back and cracking clams on his stomach.
But it will make you Roger Moore
A-moor-es
Her point was she was all done.
She then had a kid she named Laston for last one.
I think she’s gonna have Juan Moore.
When an eel bites your hand, And that's not what you planned, That's a moray.
When our habits are strange, And our customs deranged, That's our mores.
When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.
When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?
When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.
When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?
When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?
When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!
In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.
Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.
A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.
When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.
When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?
.....but, it would make you Roger Moore.
Viagra won't make you James Bond. But it will make your Roger Moore
... but it will make you Roger Moore.
