Jack Heinz Puns

To crown a new champion, I used the highest finisher in that year’s standings that had not won a championship previously.

Same champion as the real one is in regular text, different champions in italics, place they actually finished is in parenthesis

1950 Giuseppe Farina

1951 Juan Manuel Fangio

1952 Alberto Ascari

1953 Mike Hawthorn (4)

1954 Jose Froilan Gonzalez (2)

1955 Stirling Moss (2)

1956 Peter Collins (3)

1957 Luigi Musso (3)

1958 Tony Brooks (3)

1959 Jack Brabham

1960 Bruce McLaren (2)

1961 Phil Hill

1962 Graham Hill

1963 Jim Clark

1964 John Surtees

1965 Jackie Stewart (3)

1966 Jochen Rindt (3)

1967 Denny Hulme

1968 Jacky Ickx (4)

1969 Jean-Pierre Beltoise (5)

1970 Clay Regazzoni (3)

1971 Ronnie Peterson (2)

1972 Emerson Fittipaldi

1973 Francois Cevert (4)

1974 Jody Scheckter (3)

1975 Niki Lauda

1976 James Hunt

1977 Mario Andretti (3)

1978 Carlos Reutemann (3)

1979 Gilles Villeneuve (2)

1980 Alan Jones

1981 Nelson Piquet

1982 Keke Rosberg

1983 Alain Prost (2)

1984 Elio de Angelis (3)

1985 Michele Alboreto (2)

1986 Nigel Mansell (2)

1987 Ayrton Senna (3)

1988 Gerhard Berger (3)

1989 Riccardo Patrese (3)

1990 Thierry Boutsen (5)

1991 Jean Alesi (7)

1992 Michael Schumacher (3)

1993 Damon Hill (3)

1994 Mika Hakkinen (4)

1995 David Coulthard (3)

1996 Jacques Villeneuve (2)

1997 Heinz Harald-Frentzen (2 because of MSC DSQ, otherwise 3)

1998 Eddie Irvine (4)

1999 Ralf Schumacher (6)

2000 Rubens Barrichello (4)

2001 Juan Pablo Montoya (6)

2002 Kimi Raikkonen (6)

2003 Fernando Alonso (6)

2004 Jenson Button (3)

2005 Giancarlo Fisichella (5)

2006 Felipe Massa (3)

2007 Lewis Hamilton (2)

2008 Robert Kubica (4)

2009 Sebastian Vettel (2)

2010 Mark Webber (3)

2011 Nico Rosberg (7)

2012 Romain Grosjean (8)

2013 Nico Hulkenberg (10)

2014 Daniel Ricciardo (3)

2015 Valtteri Bottas (5)

2016 Max Verstappen (5)

2017 Sergio Perez (7)

2018 Kevin Magnussen (9, yes this means Haas are world champions)

2019 Charles Leclerc (4)

2020 Carlos Sainz (6, tied on points with Albon but would win on countback because CS best finish was 2nd, AA 3rd)

2021 Lando Norris (6)

Eligible to be a champion in 2022: Russell, Stroll, Gasly, Tsunoda, Mazepin, Schumacher, Ocon, Albon, Latifi, Zhou

57 championships change with 39 brand new champions. Every championship after 1982 has a change!

Edit: added where t

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

#FT: Austria 0-1 Scotland

Scotland scorers: Lyndon Dykes (30' PEN)

Venue: Ernst-Happel-Stadion

Watch live on Sky Sports Main Event

Auto-refreshing reddit comments link

LINE-UPS

Austria

Daniel Bachmann, Martin Hinteregger, Aleksandar Dragovic, David Alaba, Christopher Trimmel, Louis Schaub Yusuf Demir, Florian Grillitsch Andreas Ulmer, Stefan Ilsanker Michael Gregoritsch, Marko Arnautovic, Christoph Baumgartner, Konrad Laimer Ercan Kara.

Subs: Heinz Lindner, Florian Kainz, Alexander Schlager, Alessandro Schöpf, Philipp Lienhart, Stefan Posch, Philip Mwene, Dejan Ljubicic.

^____________________________

Scotland

Craig Gordon, Grant Hanley, Kieran Tierney, Jack Hendry, Callum McGregor, Billy Gilmour Lewis Ferguson, John McGinn, Andy Robertson, Stephen O'Donnell Paul McGinn, Lyndon Dykes Ryan Christie, Ché Adams Kevin Nisbet.

Subs: Liam Kelly, Liam Cooper, Zander Clark, Declan Gallagher, Scott McKenna, David Turnbull.

MATCH STATS | via BBC

MATCH EVENTS | via ESPN

22' Che Adams (Scotland) is shown the yellow card.

25' Martin Hinteregger Yellow Card

30' Lyndon Dykes Penalty - Scored

56' On: Michael Gregoritsch|Off: Stefan Ilsanker

56' Grant Hanley Yellow Card

71' Substitution, Scotland. Ryan Christie replaces Lyndon Dykes because of an injury.

77' On: Yusuf Demir|Off: Louis Schaub

77' On: Andreas Ulmer|Off: Florian Grillitsch

77' On: Paul McGinn|Off: Stephen O'Donnell

88' Substitution, Scotland. Kevin Nisbet replaces Che Adams.

88' On: Lewis Ferguson|Off: Billy Gilmour

88' On: Ercan Kara|Off: Konrad Laimer

90' Aleksandar Dragovic (Austria) is shown the yellow card.

^____________________________

**Comment !goal to create a link to a goal in the Match Eve

Buenosdillas

They’re on standbi

“War makes thieves and peace hangs them.”

― George Herbert

Happy Thursday writing friends!

Do we steal out of greed or out of need? What would our characters do to survive? Good words, all!

Please make sure you are aware of the ranking rules. They’re listed in the post below and in a linked wiki. The challenge is included every week!

[IP] | [MP]

Here's how Theme Thursday works:

• Use the tag [TT] when submitting prompts that match this week’s theme.

Theme Thursday Rules

• Leave one story or poem between 100 and 500 words as a top-level comment. Use wordcounter.net to check your word count.
• Deadline: 11:59 PM CST next Tuesday
• No serials or stories that have been written for another prompt or feature here on WP
• No previously written content
• Any stories not meeting these rules will be disqualified from rankings and will not be read at campfires
• Does your story not fit the Theme Thursday rules? You can post your story as a [PI] with your work when TT post is 3 days old!

Theme Thursday Discussion Section:

• Discuss your thoughts on this week’s theme, or share your ideas for upcoming themes.

Campfire

• On Wednesdays we host two Theme Thursday Campfires on the discord main voice lounge. Join us to read your story aloud, hear other stories, and have a blast discussing writing!

• Time: I’ll be there 9 am & 6 pm CST and we’ll begin within about 15 minutes.

• Don’t worry about being late, just join! Don’t forget to sign up for a campfire slot on discord. If you don’t sign up, you won’t be put into the pre-set order and we can’t accommodate any time constraints. We don’t want you to miss out on awesome feedback, so get to discord and use that !TT command!

• There’s a Theme Thursday role on the Discord server, so make sure you grab that so you’re notified of all Theme Thursday related news!

*As a reminder to all of you writing for Theme Thursday: the interpretation is completely up to you! I love to share my thoughts on what the theme makes me think of but you are by no means bound to these ideas! I love when writers step outside their comfort zones

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Bob

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)