I saw a construction cone doing weird dances in the street and wearing a clown hat. I asked the construction crew that that cone is made from.
They replied, "sili-cone"
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︎ May 30 2021
Yesterday when I walked into a store, a clown held the door open for me.
I thought it was a nice jester
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︎ May 22 2021
I was not surprised when my weird uncle was jerking off while cosplaying as a clown
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︎ Apr 27 2021
If I send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife...
is that a romantic jester?
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︎ Aug 01 2020
Did you hear that they're replacing two letters of the alphabet? Instead of T, you have to say "Clowns". Instead of V, you need to say "Jokers". I refuse to use them, but I was singing the alphabet when they changed them, so I have a problem...
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle with U.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
Always wanted to be a rodeo clown, but couldnβt because I have stomach problems
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︎ Nov 13 2020
If I told you I knew a convoluted joke about a golf club, a sheep, a stinging insect, a tree, and that scary clown movie...
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︎ Nov 15 2020
I found out recently that itβs very common for Clowns to suffer from bad necks.
I guess itβs because they always sleep funny.
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︎ Aug 07 2020
My friend asked me how many clowns I saw at the carnival today and I said
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︎ Apr 24 2020
I would only kill a clown if my family was about to starve to death.
We either digest the clown, or we die jesting!
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︎ Jul 28 2020
I was feeling a little depressed, and then I saw a clown doing sit-ups across the street.
Funny how things work out.
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︎ Jun 07 2020
When i was at a circus my mom bought me a clown shaped lollipop
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︎ Jun 21 2020
I'm inviting everyone to join me in a thought-session of Stephen King's iconic shape-shifting clown.
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︎ May 11 2020
I went out today with half of my face painted like a clown.
Not everyone saw the funny side.
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︎ Mar 17 2020
So as my boss watched, I led the group of clowns into the office, each one had a laptop computer. My boss facepalmed and said:
Dammit autocorrect!
I said we need to invest in CLOUD based IT infrastructure!
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︎ Mar 25 2020
My friend is an unemployed circus clown. I nicknamed him Pennywise . . .
His career is in the gutter.
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︎ Nov 03 2019
I went to a shop to buy a clown outfit.
I let the salesman pick my nose.
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︎ Sep 23 2019
I don't like eating clowns....
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︎ Mar 07 2019
I ate a clown fish yesterday
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︎ Dec 25 2018
I suspect the 12 disciples were a bunch of clowns, because they all fit in car.
Act2:1. ... they were in one Accord ...
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︎ Nov 26 2018
I went to an exotic seafood restaurant that serves clown fish, but I didn't eat it.
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︎ Jan 08 2019
I was attacked by a pose of clowns a
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︎ Jun 05 2019
I have a poster of the clown from it in my house that I move everyday.
Cause I like to move it , move it. I like to move it, move it.
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︎ Mar 14 2019
I was doing my food shopping when I noticed some bananas with clown faces drawn on them. I thought to myself, they're a funny looking bunch.
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︎ Feb 20 2019
Even though i was scared of clowns
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︎ Apr 13 2019
I was standing next to a clown and he farted.
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︎ Jan 14 2016
I'm sitting in traffic with my dad today when he scoffs, shakes his head, throws up his hand and says "look at THIS clown over here!"
I look over and there is literally a dude in full clown make-up driving a vw bettle next to us. Pop maintained a straight face through the whole thing.
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︎ Jan 08 2014
I heard a clown stole my friends kidneys.
It was side splittingly funny
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︎ Nov 01 2017
My dad told me what to do if i got in a fight with a gang of clowns
"Go straight for the juggler."
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︎ Aug 23 2015
I'll passionately block a river for a french female clown
I'll dam it, Madame It, damn it!
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︎ Jan 28 2018
I started dating a clown with big boobs
When my dad met her he asked if they were made of Sillycone
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︎ Feb 17 2016
I held the door open for a clown
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︎ Dec 02 2020
The other day I held the door open for a clown
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︎ Aug 24 2020
The other day I opened the door for a clown
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︎ Jan 24 2020
I held the door for a clown the other day
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︎ Jan 09 2020
I held the door open for a clown today
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︎ Oct 21 2019
The other day I held the door open for a clown...
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︎ Jan 18 2016
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