The time of year: Lent, itself, to Good Friday puns.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 03 2017
If Thursday is a sad day but Friday is even sadder, does that make it a sadder day
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 19 2021
Fridays?
π︎ 122
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
Inmates at HMP Manchester are refusing to eat the Moroccan spiced chicken dish they're given every Friday, claiming it is being used to secretly medicate them with aggression-suppressants hidden in the sauce.
That sounds to me like one of those cons' piri piri theories.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 10 2021
What did the guinea pig say to the hamster before leaving work on Friday?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 18 2020
Every Friday for dinner, I make everything deep fried
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 24 2020
I know it's Friday the 13th and COVID is raging, but...
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
Why did the naked guy go Black Friday shopping?
Because the underpants were a 100% off.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 24 2020
Friday was roasting saturday and sunday brutally yet they never occurred a word. Wednesday, being a harmonist, asked them why they stayed mum for which they replied, "because we are weakened in front of you guys".
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 14 2020
Monday: Greg. Tuesday: Ian: Wednesday: Greg. Thursday: Ian. Friday: Greg
π︎ 62
π
︎ Apr 17 2020
I was going to spend Friday night studying stinging polyps that spend major part of their lifetime attached to rocks at the bottom of the sea, but a couple pals wanted me to go bar hopping...
With friends like that, who needs anemones?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Apr 08 2020
Black Friday shopping
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 29 2019
My coworker told us this dadjoke on Friday
If I catch the Corona Virus, I hope I get Lyme Disease too.
Corona just isn't the same without a lime.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Mar 01 2020
What kind of birds only appear on Friday the 13th?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 25 2019
What happens when Black Friday falls on Friday the 13th?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 02 2019
Where does Friday come before Thursday?
π︎ 15
π
︎ Aug 26 2019
Itβs the end of work on Friday, itβs been a long week, and all my bones are just like the capital city of the Holy Roman Empire.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 14 2020
What do you call an amazing Black Friday special that comes with free cake?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 16 2019
Have you noticed that after every Friday the 13th
Comes a Saturday the 14th?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 14 2019
Happy Friday
π︎ 148
π
︎ Sep 14 2018
I asked my gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. He said how flexible are you? I said I canβt do Fridays.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Sep 07 2019
Every Friday I get a feeling my wife is up to no good.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 18 2020
Who had the hottest Black Friday deals this year?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 13 2019
The actor that played Luke on the Disney channel original TV show βJessieβ died the day after Friday
So Saturdayβs really are for the Boyce
π︎ 2
π
︎ Sep 10 2019
Friday, is that mine
π︎ 13
π
︎ May 15 2019
I think everyone should be a little more understanding this Friday.
After all, all conversations will end on a 10-4.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Oct 02 2019
Bf is on leave Friday from the navy, need navy sex pun!
TL;DR need sex pun related to the navy!
Hey everyone! My boyfriend is coming back on leave from the navy this Friday. I am making a sign to welcome him home. I need a sex pun related to the navy. One's like "put your ship in my harbor". Thanks in advance!
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 06 2018
Friday the 13th may be scary.
But may, May Fri 10 you more.
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 10 2019
"So you currently work 9 to 5, Monday through Friday," said my boss.
"That is correct," I replied.
He said, "Would you be able to work outside those hours?"
I said, "No, I might catch a cold."
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jan 28 2019
Hope everyone had a GOOD Friday!
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 20 2019
A string is walking home one Friday evening after a long week at work
And so the string decides that he shall stop at his favorite Pub and treat himself to a pint before going home to the wife. But after a decent walk he arrives at the pub to find a new sign on the door that reads " No Strings Allowed".
The string becomes infuriated. "How dare they" he thinks to himself. After having been a loyal patron for 10 years he decides this injustice is not to be tolerated and comes up with a plan.
He takes a moment and steps into the back alley way to be discreet. While he is there he ties himself into a knot and frays the top. Content with his disguise he marches back around to the front, enters the bar and has a seat when requests a pint of beer.
The bartender being a little suspicious looks at him a little uneasily but just can't seem to peg what the problem is. He serves him the beer regardless while keeping a close eye on the suspicious character. A little while later the string decides that the week at work has been so long that he is deserving of two pints of beer before going home to retire for the weekend.
It is just at that point when the bartender is serving him his second pint that he pauses and looks at the string and says "Hold on one minute! Aren't you a string?"
To which the string replied, "Sorry, I'm a frayed knot".
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jan 15 2019
A cowboy rides into town on Friday. Stays three days and leaves on Friday. How did he do it?
The horseβs name is Friday.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 22 2019
The boat shop was having a huge discount on all their Galleons and Brigantines for Black Friday this year.
It was the biggest sail event theyβve ever had.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 24 2018
Make sure to visit the tire store on black Friday.
They always have a blowout!
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 23 2018
Whatβs Captain Picardβs first instruction to his employees, in anticipation of the Friday evening crowds at a Mexican restaurant that he supervises?
βMake queso, number one.β
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 26 2018
Today is a Good Friday
But Jesus will comeback Sunday
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 30 2018
(Monday: Greg) (Tuesday: Ian) (Wednesday: Greg) (Thursday: Ian) (Friday: Greg) (Saturday: Ian) (Sunday: Greg)
Its the Gregorian calendar
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Apr 04 2019
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
π︎ 40
π
︎ Nov 10 2019
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Oh.... those were the days....
π︎ 20
π
︎ Apr 07 2019
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
π︎ 2k
π
︎ May 10 2016
I thought Friday is a sad day.
Turns out tomorrow is sadder day.
π︎ 25
π
︎ Oct 13 2018
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Ah. Those were the days....
π︎ 131
π
︎ May 01 2018
Good Friday is a sad day
And tomorrow is a Saturday
π︎ 8
π
︎ Apr 20 2019
I hope everyone here has a good Friday!
π︎ 24
π
︎ Apr 14 2017
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
