It's a little place between Dayton and Marion.
The tigers were having a great time, roaring, baring teeth and in general having a great time. The cats were sitting quietly off to the side. The tigers asked the cats, “Why so quiet ? Don’t you like to have some boisterous fun ?” The cats replied, “Oh yes, we used to be tigers too. Until we got married.”
PS. (This sounded way better when my friend told me in the original Malayalam language slang poocha-pulee)
It was a near Mrs.
Gluttonic love.
"That's harsh," I told him, "I think she has a great body."
Have a webbing.
It was a diamond in the rough.
Credit (not quite the same): Frank and Ernest by Thaves for May 02, 2020
Guess who I ran into at the White House restaurant today Donald Duck He was engaging the cashier who was asking for a tip Do you know what he says Put it on my bill
Congratulations, toilet!
What comes before a shotgun marriage?
En-gauge-ment
Her face lit up when I proposed
Engagement ring
Wedding ring
And suffering...
But I broke it off.
Only a third of them know how to Finnish
She was afraid of kermitment
Because nice Finnish guys last
Getting ready to leave he says: "Do you have a picture of the ring you want?" Me:"Ya, right here on my phone." Dad:"Some guy you are, buying her a phony ring."
Feyoncè
It’s going right in between Dayton and Marion.
It was a marry Archie band.
Irony on two many levels.
That would be a punzi scheme.
Me: “Well that seems like a blind doe.”
Her: “A what? A blind doe?”
Me: “Yep. That’s a bad-eye deer.”
Fantastic! To who???
Today, I went out to lunch with some fellas from my office, Dave and Mike.
We all opted for the "beer and sandwich deal": any beer < $6 and any sandwich from the lunch menu for $10. Can't beat that in Hoboken, NJ.
One of my coworkers ordered a Sam Adams something-or-other and our bouncy little waitress pranced off to fetch our beverages. When the waitress returned with our potables she placed a beer, amber in color, 1/2" or so foamy head, in front of my coworker and said:
"Sam?"
To which I immediately announced "No, that's Dave."
Laughs were had all around. I cringed at myself but I couldn't help it.
I was putting on my pants, I explained. I was covering up my legs.
They formed a subcommittee.
His feyonce
W Xed Y Z?
An engaged couple was walking along the beach. The woman looked down and discovered her fiance was missing some of his toes. She stopped and said "I'm sorry, I can't marry you" When the man asked why she said, "I'm lactose intolerant"
Yes, my fiancée!
Me, on speakerphone with both my parents: "So, Rob just proposed..."
Dad:"To do what?"
Me: "...."
I caught it, handed it back to her and she popped it in and said thank you. I didn't know what else to say...
So, we rode in silence for the rest of the trip until we got to the bar. When we arrived at the bar, she turned and asked if she could have my number. I was flattered because she was so pretty, but I told her I was happily engaged.
She smiled at me and said, "That's a shame, you really caught my eye."
It’s halfway between Dayton and Marion.
It's between Dayton and Marion, Ohio!
Between Dayton and Marion.
It’s between Dayton and Marion, Ohio!
It’s right between Dayton and Marion!
