Dork Puns

We’re laying in bed together talking about shoes (we’re young but pretty much could be 45) and she says “yeah I just have one pair of sneakers and that’s it” and then a moment later she whispered “sneaker shoe, I choose you...” and won’t stop giggling now...

Spoon

http://www.dorkly.com/video/71943/the-only-metroid-boss-worse-than-mother-brain

Me: I think I measured wrong. The toggle bolts aren't lining up with the darned holes. Man, I really screwed this up.

Her: Did you........make a pun?

Me: concentrating on the task at hand Huh?

Her: Never mind.

Me: gets it Ha! No, but that's awesome! "Screwed" it up. Ha! You're a PunMaster!

Her: You're a dork.

I said: "You'll have to wait until your birthday"

I don't have any children.

It gets dork out.

The balm.

Edit: My wife's response:

"God you're such a dork."

My girlfriend broke a nail at work today and told me the story after dinner.

GF: I was gonna do my nails tonight but now its pointless.

I chuckled to myself until she realized what she said. She then called me a dork and left the room. I guess I'm doing the dishes tonight.

My family spent an afternoon at Fisherman's Wharf. My daughter and I were taking pictures of the sea lions. Several of them started making noise. So I said to my daughter,"The sea lions saw you. They're saying Dork, Dork, Dork".

So my friend is a photographer and always notices the lighting and comments on how it would be for taking photos. We walk out my house and it's all gloomy.

Me: Ugh, it's so gloomy out. Her: I love it! The low key lighting is great for photos! Me: As opposed to Thor lighting? Her: Grooaaannn....

Haha 'low key' = 'Loki'? Ehh, I'm a dork