Two cats are having a swimming race. One is called βOne Two Threeβ, the other βUn Deux Troisβ. Which cat won?
βOne Two Threeβ because βUn Deux Troisβ cat sank.
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︎ Oct 16 2020
An American cat named βOne-Two-Threeβ and a French cat named βUne-Deux-Troiβ are in a swimming race. Why did the American cat win?
Because Une-Deux-Troi quatre cinq.
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︎ Jul 31 2020
French guy, showing off his yacht collection: This is Un. Here is Deux, Trois, Quatre and, finally, Six.
Her: Where is the 5th?
French guy: Cinq.
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︎ May 15 2019
Un deux trois π±
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︎ Mar 11 2019
Why do dogs float in water?
Because they are good buoys.
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︎ Sep 01 2020
Why is the Supreme Leader of North Korea number 1.
Because he is Kim Jong-Un, not Kim Jong-Deux.
Plus his father passed away since he was Kim Jong-ill.
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︎ Jan 15 2021
My wife wanted twins.
I told her my twin making machine needs calibration.
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︎ Aug 06 2020
I heard Kim Jong Un's father died.
I didn't even know he was il
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︎ May 01 2017
I see your one egg is an oeuf joke... (https://old.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/holwt9/why_do_the_french_never_have_two_eggs_for/)
But remember the real reason is because they don't deux-oeuf it.
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︎ Jul 10 2020
If Kim Jong Un were to die, what would be his succeeder's name?
π︎ 14
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︎ Apr 22 2020
Kim Jong Un isnβt alive...
Theyβre using Kim Jong Deux
π︎ 12
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︎ May 06 2020
Why did the Frenchman only eat one egg for breakfast?
Because one egg is un oeuf.
π︎ 13
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︎ Sep 16 2018
What do you call a French guy attacked by a cat?
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︎ Oct 13 2017
What is an English to French dictionary called?
π︎ 29
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︎ Apr 25 2018
If you thought Kim Jong Un was exciting...
just wait until you meet Kim Jong Deux!
π︎ 6
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︎ Dec 24 2014
What is the name of Kim Jong-un's son?
π︎ 6
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︎ May 10 2018
Rumours are that Kim Jong-un is losing power.
Replacing him will be his brother and most senior official, Kim Jong-deux.
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︎ Oct 06 2014
Do not want to be messing with 2's
Or you'll be in deep deux deux
π︎ 3
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︎ May 11 2018
French dadjoke that stumped Will Shortz on NPR
Heard this one on the radio during the Sunday Puzzle segment on NPR's Weekend America yesterday. A grandfatherly contestant on the program (named GΓ©rard) asked this riddle of NYTimes puzzlemaster and Yale enigmatologist Will Shortz:
"Two cats are competing to see who would win in a race swimming across the English Channel. The cats' names are One-Two-Three Cat and Un-Deux-Trois Cat. Who won?"
Shortz was stumped. The contestant answered the riddle saying:
"The English cat, One-Two-Three Cat won because Un-Deux-Trois-Quatre-Cinq."
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︎ Apr 14 2014
Kim Jong-Un's pretty cool but I'd like to meet his siblings
Kim Jong-Deux and Kim Jong-Trois
π︎ 3
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︎ Oct 25 2017
Obviously, I made love to the french girl twice.
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 17 2016
My 7yo son was watching me play Overwatch the other day. My team lost so the game said "Defeat". I said "why would they say that, everyone in the game has two feet."
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
My son speaks french.
"Defeat" sounds almost exactly like "Deux feet".
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︎ Jun 19 2016
My daughter posted a story to Facebook about Kim Jong-un missing in North Korea...
I replied, "He isn't missing, he's just undergoing maintenance and will be back soon as the upgraded version, Kim Jong-deux!"
π︎ 6
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︎ Oct 11 2014
Two cats had a race across a river. Their names were "One Two Three" and "Un Deux Trois". Which one came first?
"One Two Three" did cos "Un Deux Trois" cat sank.
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 12 2020
There were once two cats. They were called One Two Three and Un Deux Trois. They had a race across a stream. One Two Three won. Why?
Because Un Deux Trois cat sank!
π︎ 35
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︎ Aug 20 2019
Two cats swam across the English channel. One cat was named "One Two Three", the other "Un Deux Trois".
The "One Two Three" cat made it, but the "Un Deux Trois" cat sank.
π︎ 22
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︎ Sep 20 2017
Two cats, One Two Three and Un Deux Trois have a race across the English Channel. Who won?
Two cats, One Two Three and Un Deux Trois have a race across the English Channel. Who won? One Two Three, because Un Deux Trois Quatre Cinq!
Told by my physics teacher, who is a dad himself.
PS: If you don't know French numbers
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 23 2014
An English cat and a French cat tried to swim across a creek.
The English cat braced herself, and said βOne, two, three!β. The cat swam across. The French cat braced herself, and said βUn, deux, troisβ―!β Cat sank.
π︎ 164
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︎ Jun 15 2016
Two cats are having a swimming race.
One is called βone two threeβ and the other is βin deux troisβ. Which Cat won the race?
βOne two threeβ because the βun deux troisβ cat sank.
π︎ 15
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︎ Oct 11 2018
Two cats decide to have a boat race
One is called "one two three", the other is called "un deux trois". Who won?
"One two three" won because "un deux trois" cat sank
π︎ 16
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︎ Oct 07 2019
Two cats are racing in the water
One cat was named "One Two Three", the other cat was named "Un Deux Trois". Which cat won?
One Two Three, because Un Deux Trois cat sank.
π︎ 10
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︎ Oct 28 2018
Two Cats swimming the English Channel
Two Cats swimming the English Channel to France, one was called One Two Three and the other Un Deux Trois
which cat made it?
One Two Three because Un deux trois Cat Sank
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︎ Nov 03 2015
England and France raced two cats across the Channel
They were named One Two Three, and Un Deux Trois.
England won; The Un Deux Trois Quatre Cinq.
π︎ 22
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︎ Nov 14 2014
What will Kim Jong Un name his kids?
Kim Jong deux and Kim Jong trois
π︎ 11
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︎ Dec 27 2014
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