This pun is a Cut above the rest
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Rest in Peace boiling water
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︎ May 06 2021
Why does the rest of the Alphabet find A,E,I,O, and U so annoying?
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︎ Mar 14 2021
Rest in pieces
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︎ Dec 04 2020
Rest and potassium
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︎ Feb 02 2021
Why did the cyborg have to rest after his long road trip?
Because he had a hard drive
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︎ Feb 05 2021
Courtesy of Victor Borge, may he rest in peace:
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︎ Mar 03 2021
Went to visit my grandpa's final resting place and he left a message for me on his tombstone. I couldn't make out what it was.
It was a very cryptic message.
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︎ Feb 08 2021
While the rest of the world were stocking up on toiletpaper, the germans were stocking up on sausages and cheese
They were preparing for a wurst kΓ€se scenario
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︎ Dec 26 2020
At a rest stop, the other day, a cop asked me why I was stroking the ground....
βOfficer, the sign clearly says to βpet area.ββ
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︎ Nov 24 2020
I just heard an announcement on a loud speaker outside my home saying, "If you invest 50$ just once, you can sit and eat for the rest of your life".
I went out and saw the idiot; he was selling chairs.
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︎ Feb 09 2021
What Did Mickey Mouse say to Minnie Mouse in order to rest?
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︎ Jan 06 2021
Yup I do as well
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︎ Mar 29 2021
The impala was struggling to keep up with the rest of the herd.
She refused to pick up her pace because she was anti-lope.
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︎ Jan 09 2021
Rested and arrested.
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︎ Apr 08 2020
Within minutes, the detectives figured out what the murder weapon was.
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︎ Jan 27 2021
My wife said, "Isn't it strange how little people change?"
Now I'm thinking, "Do dwarves put on clothes differently to the rest of us. "
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︎ Apr 30 2021
After the exodus through the Red Sea, Moses's staff could no longer perform miracles, and still he kept it beside him the rest of his life...
...he just couldn't part with it.
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︎ Sep 10 2020
That costume is too small to be a harp!
Are you calling me a lyre?
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︎ Apr 14 2021
Everyone keeps telling me there's 26 letters in the alphabet, not 25
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︎ Feb 14 2021
Unpealievable..
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Stop! You're under a rest!!
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︎ Jun 17 2020
The vet said our chick has survived through the accident, but his brain was damaged so heβd have to live the rest of his life a vegetable.
Guess weβll call him Eggplant now
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︎ Nov 12 2020
Rest In piece the water i boiled
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︎ Sep 08 2020
My theory on inertia
Has never gained momentum
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︎ Mar 30 2021
I asked a German girl for her number and I'm still waiting for the rest of the numbers
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︎ Mar 06 2020
Your under a rest
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︎ Apr 17 2020
According to the second amendment, I have the right to bear arms
Now what do I do about the rest of the animal?
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︎ May 08 2021
Til that a keyboard never rests.
Only because it has two shifts
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︎ Aug 04 2020
On my death bed Iβl request to be moved to a tub full of pees just before I die so people can say βmay he rest in peesβ
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︎ Aug 22 2020
My MIL, rest her soul, asked about my background while I was dating my wife.
I was worried, as I'm a bit of a mutt.
She says she didn't care as long as I didn't have Roman hands or Russian fingers.
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︎ Oct 27 2020
What did the angry salt say to the rest of the spices?
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︎ Oct 29 2020
I tripped over my wife's bra
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︎ Feb 24 2021
What was the child who wouldnβt nap guilty of?
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︎ Apr 19 2021
This one went by cold with the rest of the chat. Stone-cold.
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︎ Jul 27 2020
Kills 99% of germs, the rest 1% cause bad puns.
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︎ May 18 2020
My son tried to make me a rest bed with a built-in water station, but the water kept squirting out.
I smiled and told him, "Hey, it's the cot that founts!"
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︎ Jul 16 2020
Van Gogh's final resting state was in...
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︎ Aug 25 2020
I rest my case
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︎ Feb 04 2020
I want to be buried with my record collection.
That would be my vinyl resting place.
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︎ Apr 29 2021
Did you hear about the italian chef that died?
He pasta way. We cannoli do so much. Theres nutelling what can happen next... His legacy will become a pizza history. Here today, gone tomato. I can only espress-so much grief, but lettuce romaine calm. How sad that he ran out of thyme. Ashes to ashes, crust to crust. There's just not mushroom left for italian chefs in this world... Sending olive my prayers to his family. His wife is really upset, cheese still not over it... You never sausage a tragic thing. Its such a shame good people die fusilli reasons. It was a farfalle from grace... My condolences for Roberto, who died in the spaghetto. May he rest in yeastππ»β€οΈ
Wow! Im so glad so many people laughed at this joke, I got so much happy feedback from everyone lol thank u sm for all the rewards and upvotes, my week couldnt get better!π
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︎ Oct 27 2020
Looking at a bottle of Molasses got me thinking...
What do they do with the rest of the mole?
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︎ Mar 21 2021
I do indeed rest my case
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︎ Jun 24 2020
Stop you're under a rest!
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︎ Apr 17 2020
me when I win an argument
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︎ Feb 06 2021
People with eye twitches always look so well rested...
It must be because they're always getting twenty winks
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︎ Aug 08 2020
I asked my future father-in-law for his daughter's hand in marriage.
He said I hope you take the rest of her too!!
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︎ Apr 26 2021
Rest assured.
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︎ May 16 2020
Rest In Peace boiling water
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︎ Feb 18 2021
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