What is it called when a priest is a popping a cyst?

An Exorcyst.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReineDeTaBite
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
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I have a large pimple on my face. I keep complaining about how much it hurts, and my girlfriend keeps telling me it's because it isn't a pimple it is a cyst.

I told her "okay, if you incyst"

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
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I have a cyst on my back and my wife helped me drain it. She won the pun war that night.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yme159753
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
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I have a cyst in my body.

I'm naming it "narci".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dudecancode
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
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I used to not like this enormous cyst on my face...

But it's really growing on me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chuckyocouch_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
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What do you call a helpful tumor?

A cyst.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/1mandelbrot1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
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Hoping this pun grows on people..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/messwell
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
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A man walks into his doctor's office

With a large, painful lump under his armpit. In a slight panic, the man asks the doctor if there's any way he can help by informing him of what the massive growth is.

The doctor looks carefully and slightly questioning his diagnosis says, "A cyst?"

"Right", says the man, "I'd love to know what the hell this thing is and if you can help me with it".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ANoiseChild
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
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Who’s the pimple’s favorite sibling?

His cyst-er

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
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When you have to choose between between going out with your ex again or have a growth on your forehead, what is that choice called?

An ex-or-cyst?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheThurmanator
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
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My brother can't stop talking about a growth that he's developed on his six-pack.

I think he's ab cyst.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
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Request for puns

Hi guys, I have a friend who has recently has surgery on her back to remove some cysts. I'm going to give her a get well card and I want to put as many back/cyst/surgery/recovery/etc. related puns or general sayings as I can for a goofy card that will hopefully give her some chuckles.

E.g. "You're like a CYSTer to me", "Hope you get BACK to being well soon", "You've been through enough PUNishment". Etc.

Help me Reddit you're my only hope. :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Oneofakindof
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2015
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Surgery

So my dad owns a computer repair company, and he needed surgery for a cyst in his neck today.

He sent me a picture of his head wrapped in bandages when he was on his way home saying "Added in some memory today". To which I responded: "Did they have to RAM it in?".

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2017
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When Donald Trump's doctor replied to him via email about a suspicious mark on his back, what did the subject line say?

Re: Cyst

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πŸ‘€︎ u/halal_and_oates
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2017
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What do you call a growth on a drug dealer?

A pharma-cyst

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeerAndJameson
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2017
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My Dad and the urologist shared a dadjoke at the worst time...

I was 16 and had found a small cyst (marble sized) in my scrotum. My regular Doc. had referred me to a Urologist, my dad came along "for support"

Dr: Hello, I'm Dr. so and so, what brings you in to see me?

Dad: Well it's my son here, apparently he has grown a third testicle.

Dr: I see, if that's case, the truth is you don't need me, you need to get your son an agent!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/carbidegriffen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2014
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What do you call Raymond's bigoted tumor?

A Ray-Cyst.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/designatedjohnny
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2016
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Oh no! Too many selfies has given me cancer!

I wasn't really listening to everything the doctor said, but he definitely said it involved a narci cyst

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NiacTD
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2014
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Phone call from my aunt.

So my mom had emergency surgery for an ovarian cyst this week. She's home since, and people are calling just to see how she is.

The day after the surgery, my mom is still weak and can't walk very well. The phone rings, so I pick it up for her, it's my aunt. After the usual "Hi, how are yous," she says to me, "So, how's her cyst-a?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlueBackedRobin
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2015
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Got my girlfriend good last night

My back has been hurting lately, an last night when my girlfriend came by, she did me the favor of rubbing my back. As she got lower, I told her about a smallish fatty lump on my lower right side. She asked if it hurt to rub or touch, and I said calmly without thinking, "nah, it hasn't hurt anyone, doesn't ever do anything but cyst there."

We sat in silence for a few seconds as we realized what just happened. I couldn't stop smiling, but the house groaned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/De4con
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2014
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Dad joked the old man himself.

My dad learned he has some kind of cyst in his sinus cavity and was told to avoid getting removed immediately. When he told me this I replied "So you should recyst getting it removed?". We both chuckled a little longer than we should have.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonerThrash
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2014
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What do you call it when a pill gets a zit?

A pharma-cyst

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RicoSuave803
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2014
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