What do you call the time period between the Bronze and Iron Ages where humans learned to cure meat?
Out of all the inventions of the Bronze Age...
The shovel has to be the most groundbreaking of all
What was a very common name in the middle ages?
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Does anyone know any good sword fighting puns ? I'm trying to think of any words that have..
Why don’t swords ever become obsolete?
They are cutting edge technology.
When women get to the age of 50, they tend to collect lots of cats.
This phenomenon is known as many-paws.
Where do pirates get the swords?
Under-age Weasel walks into a bar... orders a drink.
So an under-age weasel waltzes into the local bar one fine Friday. He asks the bartender,
"HEY! Whatcha got to drink here?"
Bartender checks his ID, replies with,
"Well sir, since you're not quite old enough, here are your options:
We got tap water, seltzer water, apple juice, orange juice, milk, coffee, tea, and pop."
"POP! Goes the Weasel."
If your ever in a sword fight, try to chop their feet off
Then you will de-feet him
Why did the dark ages get its' name?
Trying to find motivation and engage with research of what motivated people in the post-Bronze Age to engage in building double-storey dwellings...
Irony on two many levels.
I like to imagine a world where "sword" is a swear word...
Where you have to tell your children not to say the "S"-word.
Me: Doc, I can't stop swallowing swords, spitting fire, and swinging from a trapeze...
Doc: I can't help you, sounds like you need advanced sideshowtherapy.
I manage to cut off my enemies leg during a sword fight
The enemy: aww, you de-feeted me
If a blacksmith made counterfeit swords...
My best friend said, "I've been babysitting children from the age of 19."
I said, "But by that age they are adults."
How does a dog age in space?
What do new age people call a dam?
When I was your age
We had to log on to the internet uphill in the snow, both ways.
Someone baked my sword! It made me so angry!! I guess you could say...
How do you know every tree over the age of two is not a robot?
They pass the two ring test
It took me ages cleaning the dishes with my wife.
Next time, I think I'll use a sponge instead.
When I was your age I was pretty good at hide and seek, but then I moved.
This is how I became world champion.
What did the whale say to the sword fish?
You're looking sharp today!
How long does it take to beat a Sega game backwards? Ages...
Why does it take sailors ages to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C
What do you call a dog that doesn’t seem to age?
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
What’s the oldest age someone could get a circumcision?
I just want to know the cutoff date.
Once upon a time a broken sword told me it was the best weapon in the world...
How many swords do you have?
A new pub opened up that allows minors over the age of twelve.
My dad used to hit me with cameras
Why shouldn't you put more than 239 beans in a soup?
Because adding just one more would make it too farty. Straight from my 7 year old daughter.
Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes. I showed my daughter how many people saw and appreciated her humor and she's extatic. I know she probably didn't come up with the joke herself but this was one of the first times she really got me with a good one and I thought I'd share it with some fellow dads and others.
I feel like the stress of the pandemic has really aged me...
...I look at least a year older.
Thousand and thousands of years ago, during the last ice age, there lived an animal that excelled at trigonometry, geometry, and could recite Pi to 100 decimal places. It was known simply as.....
.....the mammothematician.
At age 18 I lost both my kidneys...
...from that day in I had adult-neys.
If you wanted to take a bunch of bullets and forge them into a sword fit for a king what Caliber would you use?
It would be shocking if this isn't a repost but I could not resist
What do you call it when someone bellow the age of 18 has a problem
Don't bring cheese to a sword fight.
But if you do, make sure it's extra sharp.
I havent read a book in ages. So i decided to start with a book of how clocks work.
How did the old French cheese-maker die?
Why won't swords go obsolete?
They are cutting edge technology.
What's the oldest age someone could get a circumcision ?
I just need to know the cut-off date.
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