Just bought some new blackout curtains.

The difference between them and my old ones is like night and day.

(My wife just bought us some yesterday, I sent her this via text and she sent me an eye roll emoji)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dunkar00s
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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What's a synonym for blackout?

Silence of the lamps.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nieepie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
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I just can't stand playing Call of Duty Blackout old.reddit.com/r/Blackops…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GATh33Gr8
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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I can't remember the last time I got blackout drunk
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2015
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Texan Politicians eat free!

At Blackout Steakhouse

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_fups_
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
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What happened to the alcoholic gymnast?

They were prone to rolling blackouts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCochMan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
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Friend: Hey, how are you?

Me: I got drunk last night and had a blackout.

Friend: OMG, are you ok?

Me: Yeah, but the mosquito that bit me and the electric company aren’t though.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
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I've legitimately practiced for this one. I'm so glad I was prepared when it happened.

I'm a teacher, and due to recent storms we've had a few short-lived blackouts.

Today in class the electricity was being fixed by the company and they had to shut the lights off for a few minutes.

Secretary (comes in the room): were there any problems with the lights off?

Me (I've got this, I'm ready!): No, we were delighted.

The secretary left, paused outside and then came back in with the worst glare possible. Yes!!!

Thank you guys, I was prepared.

Edit: Front page!!! Awesome! This is the highlight of my day! Keep your puns coming, I love them all (and I'm secretly practicing them for the proper opportunity).

Thank you so much /user/x9x9x9x9x9 for the gold! It made everything that much better.

Keep your puns coming you guys (especially teachers!).

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sal6a
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2016
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Parent Got jokes and Everything

Me, to my dad, regarding potential blackouts in the SF Bay Area: Are any blackouts planned for your neighborhood?

My dad, to me: Probably, but we are in the dark about it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bowlbettertalk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
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(x-post from /r/jokes) I tried to redeem airline miles for a flight on St Patrick's Day

But I was told I couldn't because it is a blackout day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Banana_Hammock_Up
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2016
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