Well I mean I would be mad...
My sister might as well be a Dad
Well, next year we'll be able to say
Well he must be from Boston..
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
Well, to be honest
I'd have to change my name
Well I guess it must be the year of the dog
A man walks into a doctors office. “What seems to be the problem?” Asks the doc. “It’s... um... well... i have five penises.” Replies the man. “Blimey!” Says the doctor, “how do your trousers fit?” “Like a glove.”
Well, it can be annoying.
Studies can be pun as well
I get ignored so much, might as well be called terms and conditions
Well, to be frank...
I’d have to change my name!
Glass urns coming to the market now. How well they will sell? Remains to be seen.
Well, I always try to be positive about the situation.
Well.. I don't think there is many worse things to be inspired by
The jury found me guilty. I asked the judge what the punishment would be, and he said: "Well..."
Son: what's that in the beer glass on the mantle? Me: well, that's your uncle Frank that's where he wanted his remains. It was his favourite beer stein. He always said it would be funny, never got why.
Son: maybe it's so he could be a frank in stein?
Me: Dammit Frank!
EA Sports have released a new Happy Potter: Wimbledon game. You can be any of the well know characters: Ron, Harry, Hermione.
I met Buzz Aldrin once and asked how he felt being the second man on the moon. "Well..." he said. "It could have been anyone. Right up until we landed, we hadn't decided who would be first out the door. Then, once we touched down, Neil suggested we flip for it."
"And he won?" I asked.
"Well, no..." he mumbled. "The coin was still in the air when Neil jumped down the ladder, the big jerk!"
My brothers hate me and my mom might well be on her way to disowning me because I told them the Flash didn't need to get shocked by lighting...
since he was already Barry fast.
^(sighs)
My dad however, is very proud of me.
Why can houses never be perfect? Well, they wouldn’t be good if they were floor-less would they?
Reading to my 5 year old the other day when this picture came up, and my wife said “he must be dropping a log.” I think I’ve trained her well.
https://i.imgur.com/gCd9CRy.jpg
I was never able to spell well, so this one is mine. He shall be named Fill, and he shall be mine.
imgur.com/PDxyta8
May not be a Dad yet, but got the little sister pretty well with this one
imgur.com/a/1riYV
Well, those seem to be pretty JAMMED in there...
The sign at the pub said "Well-behaved kids welcome, bad kids will be baked into pies"
"Just the knees?", I asked. I'm a dad even when my daughter's not around, gotta keep my game up.
He might as well be a dad now
So it is my birthday today and I go by the nickname cuttss everywhere. I see a notification about a friend saying happy birthday on facebook and I see this...
"Happy birthday Cuttss, I hope it's a sharp one!"
Groans were had
You know.. my legs may be getting older. Knee's aren't doing as well as I'd like. But I have to hand it to them, they've supported me almost my entire life.
I got my 5yo really good. I might be a single mother, but my father taught me well.
My 5yo daughter came running up to me after playing at the park on a very sunny day.
Her: "Mommy, I'm thirsty."
Me: "Hi thirsty, my name's mommy. What can I do for you?"
Her: "No Mommy! I'm not thirsty! I'M THIRSTY!"
Me: "Now you're not making any sense."
She promptly let out a groan and stomped away.
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
Well to be frank
I'd have to change my name
A man walks into a doctors office. "What seems to be the problem'P" Asks the doc. um... well... I have five penises," replies the man. "Blimey!" Says the doctor "how do your trousers fit?"
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
Well to be frank...
I’d have to change my name
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
Well, to be Frank...
I'd have to change my name.
Well, to be frank,
I'd have to change my name.
Well, to be frank.
I'd have to change my name.
I met Buzz Aldrin once and asked how he felt being the second man on the moon. "Well..." he said. "It could have been anyone. Right up until we landed, we hadn't decided who would be first out the door."
"Then, once we touched down, Neil suggested we toss for it."
"And he won?" I said.
"Well, no." he mumbled. "The coin was still in the air when Neil jumped down the ladder, the jerk."
Well, to be Frank...
I'd have to change my name
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