It’s kind of sad that Christianity, Judaism, and Islam have been fighting each other for centuries.

Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.

πŸ‘︎ 498
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
🚨︎ report
A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly ...

... and as you can see, they were Wright

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Wild Falcons live to be about 13. So all the Falcons in the wild today were born in the 21st Century.

They're Millennial Falcons

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adfunk101
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the 20th century come before the 21st?

Because twenty first century.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thisboishere
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
🚨︎ report
You know what they said in weather begotten 10th century Europe...

When it reigns it poors.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PeasOfMind
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2017
🚨︎ report
September, October, November, and December should have been the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th month.

Whoever screwed this upβ€”- I hope he got stabbed.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
🚨︎ report
I was very poor growing up. On my 10th birthday we bought half a cake with 5 candles.

We put it against a mirror.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Coming this fall to CBS, a new sitcom about a pair of actresses living in the 17th Century...

It’s called β€œ2 Baroque Girls”.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bgva
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
🚨︎ report
You know what's funny? The wu chu war in China in the 4th century bc.

What? Tzu-Sun?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gwtkof
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2016
🚨︎ report
Get it?, Bc he is a vowel...
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MattizVermeulen
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
For the 10th year in a row, my coworkers voted me "the most secretive guy" in the office.

I can't tell you how much this award means to me.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
🚨︎ report
The 10th Fast and Furious film should be called...

Fast-10 your seat belts.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Just read an amazing account of a 13th-Century siege.

Just read an amazing account of a 13th-Century siege.

The attackers killed the duke's son, knocking him from the battlements with a peasant's severed head fired from a trebuchet.

It was the first recorded instance of a serf-face-to-heir missile.

From Twitter.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WWTSound
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Catholic priests were forbidden from learning math until the 20th century

Before that it was a cardinal Sin

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ramiel01
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
So yall know how people used wooden dentures in the 19th century? I wonder if women ever tried or thought of using the same idea to increase boob size.

That would be something, now wooden tit?

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/phx14_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
🚨︎ report
The 21st century is now old enough to drink.

And you thought the sober years were bad

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JadedByEntropy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you seen the movie about production methods of boats, planes, and bridges in the 20th century?

I can't remember the name but it's riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joey_the_Duck
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
After a half century of study, I’ve discovered the true connection between mind and body.

It’s the neck.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pauldeanbumgarner
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Heard the 10th Fast and The Furious movie is gonna be about car safety

Working title is called Fast 10: Your Seatbelt

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SamisNeat69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting...

He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."

"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."

So they did.

Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.

And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LynnOrtiz85
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
🚨︎ report
My College Internship Almost Ruined My Life

I'm quite the music history buff- always have been. My first inkling as a college student was to explore turning this into a career. So I found a music museum, wrote an impassioned essay, and somehow landed the 12-week internship.

When I got there, I met the curator, a woman named Rhonda. Like me, she had grown up enjoying music and always wanting to know more. Thanks to grants and donors' generosity, she had helped continue the museum's legacy of showcasing what might otherwise be lost to history.

The tradition of the museum had always been to let the interns work in the orchestral wing. My assignment in particular was the string section.

Now I didn't know a whole lot about the string family, but I saw some really fine specimens and decided we could perhaps tell a broader story about the progression of the instruments. And so I began studying.

After about a week of studying, I went to Rhonda and asked if we could do something different here. She was very receptive to the idea and introduced me to her assistant, Dr. Will. His PhD was in history, natch, but he still relished having everyone call him Doctor. It was funny.

Dr. Will helped me learn so much about how the family of instruments developed over time, their overall cultural footprint, etc.

Did you know a fiddle and a violin are the same thing? Did you know the viola family dates back to the 16th C.? Vivaldi wrote 25 cello concertos!

I dazzled visitors with tales of the Stradivarius, Amati and Guarneri families. I noted the increase in neck length over time. I reassured them that despite the name catgut, no cat intestines were used in the creation of these instrumentsβ€”but it sure might be sheep or goat.

Sadly, 12 weeks goes by quickly when you're having fun, and I got enthusiastic letters of recommendation from Rhonda and Dr. Will, and I do miss them. Hello, you two.

I figured I could waltz (sorry) right in to more museum jobs later, but boy, was I mistaken.

I kept interviewing for the job, but after about the 10th cold shoulder, I had to find out what I was doing wrong. I had done such a good job, after all, right??????

So I fucking called the museum

got the guy who interviewed me on the lineβ€”and he wasn't thrilled to even talk to me. But I asked him, sir, why didn't I even get a call back? Weren't my qualifications good?

He said, yes, BUT.......

"...we simply can't hire someone who has exhibited a history of violins."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yungcfa
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long fence pole. He hates it.

It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Maimonides_vii
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
🚨︎ report
I'm holding a 17th Century Party, and all the Enlightenment thinkers can swing by - except one.

Immanuel Kan't.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Supah_Cole
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I just read that times were real tough for musicians in the early 17th century...

They were all Baroque

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/qwopcircles
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
getting rid of this lifestyle bc out of date
πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PFDRC
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
How did women in the 16th century stay fit?

They worked their core-set

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/swaghettigod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I was in an elevator and got out at the 10th floor.

The operator said β€˜Have a nice day son’. β€˜Don’t call me son’ I said. β€˜You’re not my dad’ The operator scratched his head and said β€˜No, but I brought you up didn’t I?’

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/debin_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Tootsie Pops finally got into the 21st century and created a Facebook page. With it, they created a new catchphrase.

How many likes does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/callmefinny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A Little Town In Mexico And Their Love Of Mayonnaise

There was a little town in Mexico, right across the border from Texas. They got a taste for Mayonnaise from the Cowboys crossing the border to eat. Soon they created a festival for their love of Mayonnaise. They’d have every type of mayonnaise you could think of. Folks loved it. The 10th anniversary of the festival was coming up and they decided they wanted to do something special. They heard of a place in England that made the worlds very best. They placed their order and was told it would be shipped overseas to them by boat. Because they had placed such a large order, the only ship capable of carrying it was the Titanic. The folks were waiting excitedly until the morning that the Titanic had hit a iceberg. When the news came that they wouldn’t get their shipment and to honor those lives lost, they decided to rename their festival. It became known as β€œSinko De Mayo.”

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RedDirtCountryBoy
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is first-century Rome like a 2-star restaurant?

Neither one is concerned about cross contamination.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CognitiveNerd1701
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
It’s the Melony of the century
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lliH-knaH
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Dads in 2999 be like

See you next week See you next month See you next year See you next decade See you next century See you next millenium

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThyDad69
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
If 6 was afraid of 7 bc it ate 9, why was 10 scared?

Bc it was in the middle of 9/11

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chaoscontrol71
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A woman is walking through the park when she sees a very attractive man sitting on a park bench. He's reading a book and eating some fruit out of a Tupperware container. Slowly the woman gathers the courage to go ask the man out...

So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."

Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"

"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."

The man can't believe it.

"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"

Naturally, they're both shocked.

"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."

Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."

They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.

"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"

The man puts down his fruit and responds,

"It's a date!"

πŸ‘︎ 17k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Just saw Mark Knopfler walking down the Road...

He was carrying a 19th century French masterpiece under his arm and a cage with 2 baby birds in his hand.

I asked how much they were and he said, "I got my Monet for nothing and the Chicks for free".

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adfunk101
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
🚨︎ report
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...

I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/youtellmebob
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Islam, Judaism, and Christianity have been in conflict with each other for centuries.

Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
🚨︎ report
For the 10th year in a row, my coworkers voted me "the most secretive guy" in the office.

I can't tell you how much this award means to me.

πŸ‘︎ 18k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting...

He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."

"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."

So they did.

Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.

And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KimKeeling43
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long pole. He hates it.

It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.

πŸ‘︎ 457
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FaolCroi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
🚨︎ report
The 10th film for The Fast and Furious was just announced

And its called "Fast Ten, Your Seatbelt"

πŸ‘︎ 99
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PM_ME_RAWR
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
🚨︎ report
For the 10th year in a row, my coworkers voted me β€œthe most secretive guy” in the office.

I can’t tell you how much this award means to me.

πŸ‘︎ 292
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long fence pole. He hates it.

It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Reap268
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
🚨︎ report
For the 10th year in a row, my coworkers voted me β€œthe most secretive guy” they ever met.

I can’t tell you how much this means to me.

πŸ‘︎ 249
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report

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