I asked my dad his opinion on Roe vs. Wade

He said he'd prefer to float.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saucyminnow
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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My dad didn't like the decision in Roe vs Wade

He said you had to see what type of river it was before you decide how to cross it.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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Wade Wilson changed profession and got a new nickname:

He is now the taxidriver known as Carpool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/midy-dk
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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Sometimes, when you find yourself walking through a shallow pool for no reason...

...you have to stop and ask yourself what you’re wading for...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sully1227
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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Why didn’t Tom Petty like fly fishing?

The wading is the hardest part.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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My father always taught me to be prepared for any emergency. I was on the ball when the streets flooded...

I was ready and wading!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
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I’m debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...

It’s row v. wade.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LavenderBlue_
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
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3 holes, no wading. imgur.com/qK4y2uf
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Orangecrush420
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2013
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I was going to take a winter swim

But after wading in I got cold feet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JukeboxSommelier
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
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So if Dwyane Johnson actually runs for president,

He'll win by a landslide

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AuraXmaster
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2016
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I hear Denver's Defensive Coordinator is dyne to change his name...

to Pascal. He hopes to contain Cam Newton to a one meter square area.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/flaspike
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2016
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Last Summer With My Girlfriend

Last summer, my girlfriend and I went camping. One of the days, we were having lunch by a river (a kind of a picnic sort of thing). Now, I talk a lot when I eat, so she finished eating waaaaay before I did. Once she was finished, she took to the water to cool off while I continued munching away.

Now, I guess she must have slipped or something, because all of a sudden I heard a cry and she was just gone. Washed away. I saw her head bob above the surface probably 20 yards downstream, and moving fast towards some rapids (probably 100-150 yards away). So I'm pretty panicked at this point, but she manages to grab onto a low-hanging branch (just like in a movie or something). She's coughing and sputtering and hollering for help, trying to keep a grip on the branch.

So, I set down my avocado I'd been snacking on and walked out into the water. "hurry! I can't hold on much longer," she's yelling. I kept walking towards her, but the bottom of the river was so muddy that it was probably pretty slow. She started to get angry with me "SWIM over here! Why are you walking? Please hurry!" She yelled, with great urgency. All in all, it took me probably 8 minutes to cover the 80 yards or so to get to her. After I rescued her, she was super mad for some reason. She was all "I almost died, why were you going so slow? Who does that? What's wrong with you?"

"Well," I said. "Good things are worth wading for."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRiz89
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2014
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There were too many applicants for boot camp

Many of them had to be put on a wading list.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TakaComics
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2016
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I actually submitted my own idea for a Deadpool movie.

He survives through to the 24th century and gets his own ship. He somehow runs afoul of a certain Bajoran captain who used to be a distinguished ensign on the Enterprise, under Captain Picard.

The movie then becomes about their conflict. The response from the studio wasn't kind. They said I should abort the idea. They said it would be too controversial to make a movie about Ro v. Wade.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Myntrith
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2016
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My son just got back from Schlitterbahn

Him: I hung out with my friend Wade all day Me: Good thing you didn't hang out with your friend sunk. Eye rolls all around....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Elevatorlovin
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2015
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