Unsatiable Puns

Every time you make food half of it always goes missing before you dish it out for yourself. After weeks of investigations and exorcisms, you gave up and started doubling the food you make, but recently, money's gotten tight. You can't afford food for 2 and you're not sure what's going to happen

I hunger. I see the young man hungers too but I cannot help it.

I hunger so painfully.

The desire for sustenance howls through my entire being and food only temporarily satiates it. His rituals have caused my soul to flag, yet I return as soon as a crumb of food crosses my tongue.

I do not know what I am, nor why I have come to plague this man, a ghost of famine.

I fear that, perhaps, he will soon find himself withered, a husk like me, forced to grow thin and diminish until he too is nothing but the mere thought of consumption. The mere concept of hunger.

There is little I can do to save him, little I can do to help, but I am nothing if not little. I will do what I may.

In the first month, I attempt to reach out. All I can really do is rearrange the food on his dish before siphoning it into my eternal gullet. These attempts do little to establish communication. Instead, he weeps. He is running out of money.

In the second month, I focus on money. Whenever he leaves his home, I shift my starving gaze to the wallets and purses of those we pass. I can only consume half, but I store it in my mouth before regurgitating it in his home, once he falls asleep. This sustains him for some time. He does not remember where the money comes from, but he blames his lack of memory on hunger.

We survive like this for some time until I make a mistake. One day, when the man is at work, I steal half the money from the register he works at. I know little of the monetary conventions of humans, but he takes the fall for the missing funds. He loses his job. I have, again, failed.

In the third month, I take to siphoning away energy from those we pass in the street. He has grown rail-thin, but by absorbing half a day's energy from each passerby, he grows stronger. Inhumane strength becomes his borderline. Unburnable energy. Sleepless nights. If I give him too little, he begins to waste away again.

Still, he weeps at night for I can do little to give him what he wants. Food. Work. Stability.

I weep too, for I also know not these things. I float beside him, disembodied and incorporeal, strong enough to only ever take half of what I need. He lies before me, slowly fading, doomed

I'm 5'2" 25f 106lbs. I take 40mg pantoprazole once a day-in the morning because of my (small)Hiatal Hernia

I am hungry 24/7, no matter how much food I eat, i am still starving, as if I didn't even eat anything. I ate 5 waffles, 2 full sized avocados, a glass of water, half a Gatorade and I'm still starving even 20 mins later. Eating doesn't satisfy my hunger. I eat slow too!

The only time im not hungry is the brief period when I wake up before I take my ppi. Im convinced the med is causing me to be hungry all the time. I mean, I could probably use the extra motivation to eat more food, since I am trying not to lose weight, but man I hate that the 1 thing in the forefront of my mind all day is food and eating. Its literally stopped me from wanting to do things because of how hungry I am, all the time. Its gotten to the point that I dont know when my body actually needs to be fed, since I'm so used to ignoring the constant hungry feeling.

I plan on bringing this up to my doctor at my next appt at the end of the week, but I also wanted to see if anyone else get this from pantoprazole?

I was taking Lamictal 50+25 for photosensitivity for a year and was very satisfied. Although I couldn't take my recommended dose of 50+50 due to dry mouth so it was a bit of compromise.

2 mo ago I was persuaded to take Eglonyl on daily basis and it killed my hormones abruptly. I went into horrible horrible perimenopausal symptoms (I m 54). I would wake up at 1AM and couldn't sleep until morning. Unrelated to that, I also started taking my recommended dose of Lamictal and was symptom-free and very happy for that.

At the same time I started to feel unbearable thirst but didn't connected that to Lamictal. I would drink 1l of water just between midnight and 8AM. Regarding hormonal upheaval, while waiting for gyn appointment I helped myself with Refemin and tofu, it got bearable (it is not the hotness in hot flashes that is unbearable but some horrible feeling of weakness in my body), but thirst remained the same. I suffered a lot and it took me almost 2 months to realize the thirst was due to Lamictal.

After lowering my Lamictal dose to 50+0 the thirst become bearable. But I was surprised to notice that hot flashes got better, too, and I can finally sleep! (My blood work is good besides sodium and potassium on lower side of normal range so I take more salt and potassium pills.) I still wake up during the night to drink but I finally sleep after many months! (I'm not myself yet. When I get out of the bed in the morning I feel as if beaten, my whole body hurts.)

Not happy with less Lamictal. I was thinking about gabapentin but red some horrible stories on their sub.

Occupy your mind with good things rather than perversions. All it takes is one little giving in to a temptation and it has a domino effect. Don't let it destroy you. God wants you to overcome lust but you have to deny your flesh and pray. Read scripture and if it helps when you get tempted, read scripture specifically on lust. Stay strong brothers and if you feel like giving in flee from sin and pray to the almighty who is always with you.

Good evening,

Fistly I'd like to apologise is the question was answered here a hundred times already, I didn't find any.

Secondly, I'm not at home and my internet access is limited so I can't link any source/quote or reply quite instantly.

Shinzen Young mentioned in one of his recent talks that some people feel this unsatiable hunger, a hole that needs to be filled in but nothing is enough. Which put my exact feeling into words. It sounds like a realm on hungry ghosts from what I can tell. And my partial understanding of the first noble truth makes this feeling more pronounced.

It is a good motivator to practice mediation and to peruse the teachings further. Because when I meditate, the feeling becomes less bothersome. So eventually, I would like to become a monk and devote to some path.

Whenever I mention that I'd rather give up what I have and deal with this unfulfillment, than to live normally as I did to this point and knowing it's all but a bandage on a gaping hole in my heart, when I say that people look at me funny. Including those I meditate with on weekly basis (zen and boddhi path traditions respectively).

All I know is that all the things and experience I have did not "feed it".

How common is this? What would you suggest? Do you have some more information about this strange hunger I should know?

Thank you for everything :)

The talk of pretzels made me want them, but I don't have any. Only a cad like you would torment my tastebuds so.

On a related note, may I request that the servants are instructed to make up some pretzels for me to savour post-victory.

EDIT 1: Changed most of Miru's abilities to synergize with at least some parts of her kit.

Class: Warrior

Type: Melee, Physical

Pantheon: Polynesia

Lore

Through the vast expanse of Polynesian islands, Miru, the goddess of the dead lords over the darkest and most perilous part of the underworld. She haunts and traipses through the pit of the afterlife, looking for wandering and lost souls to snatch and cook in her terrifying oven. When a soul looked over the land of the setting sun and leaped off a cliff to join the ancestors, Miru would lay in wait, snatching the unsuspecting soul and dragging them down into the pit for a feast. Her daughters, siren-like maidens who lure men to their doom, fetch their mother souls for her to cook.

Once Miru heard about a hero named Ngaru who had boasted of demons and monsters he vanquished. Envious of a hubristic demigod, Miru lured the hero to her oven. The demigod’s uncle uncovered Miru’s plan. She was going to stupefy Ngaru in a trance and fatten him with meals of earthworms, beetles, and centipedes. Fearful of his nephew’s death, the uncle summoned a rainstorm and doused the flames of her oven and washed the goddess away.

Miru’s only thought is her relentless hunger. No being or god can satisfy her drive. As the world begins to crumble around for the gods, Miru’s return is a source of anxiety for the Polynesian gods. They worry as she begins crawling out of her pit, craving for a new type of meat…the gods.

Passive: Unsated

Miru gains stacks of Unsated when she kills a god or a minion. Each slain minion or jungle creature provides 1 stack while gods provide 5 stacks. At 20 stacks, Miru gains a Roasted Soul, a consumable that restores 80 (+2.5 per level) health instantly and provides 3 (+2 every level) for 30 seconds.

If Miru has a Roasted Soul in her consumable slot, any new Roasted Souls gained will be at the Item Store, available to her for free.

Additionally, Miru gains additional effects on her abilities after consuming Roasted Souls. The power buffs of consecutively consumed Roasted Souls do not stack. The heal is affected by anti-heal.

Ability 1: Dread Screech

Miru feels the pangs of her hunger, letting out a ghastly screech in a cone in front of her. All enemies take damage and become silenced for the duration. While Miru is under the effects of Roasted Soul, Dread Screech has a wider cone area and reduces all abilities on cooldown by 1 second.

Type: Cone, Area of Effect

Do your worst!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Buenosdillas

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!