What vegetable is sorta rad, but not totally rad?

A radish

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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Sorta wholesome

My girlfriend: I’m pregnant Me: hi pregnant, I’m gonna be dad

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OuriyaBL
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
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(Maybe kinda sorta potential spoiler) Game of Thrones ending was brutal last night...

...I keep hearing him scream...Oberyn Oberyn over again...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/panzergling
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2014
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A girl came up to me and said she recognised me from her vegetarian resturaunt.

I was a bit confused, I'd never met herbivore.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BucketHatManReni
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2018
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A woman got hit in the head by a can of soda

Thank goodness it was a soft drink

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mad2swim
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2018
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Spent all day rinsing several palates of damaged Coca-Cola cans at the food bank today. The stuff at the bottom was ... gross. At home mom asked what we did.

We sorted sorta sordid sodas.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/welloveramillion
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2019
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[Help!] I'm asking this girl to prom and I need help with the sign.

She's super good at basketball and signed to Alabama earlier this year. I was trying to think of something funny, and usually I'm pretty good at that sorta thing, but Alabama just doesn't work too well. Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_munch_butts_AMA
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2016
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How do you catch a polar bear?

You make a hole in the ice and line it with peas. When the bear goes in to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2013
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Did you hear about the trekkie that sold all his star trek merch?

He was sorta stuck between a spock and a hard place.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/officialdahl
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2017
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We were talking about fishing spots.

Is that water brackish?

Yeah it's sorta brownish blackish guess you could call it brackish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kmfb
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
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I froze to absolute zero

But apparently I've got some sorta power that makes me resistent to it. So people kept asking: how are you, how do you feel. I constantly said: relax, I am 0k

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeteGriffin32
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2017
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Dad, always wearing the proper attire.

Link

This is not my content, which is sorta kinda against this r/'s policy, but I couldn't find it on here and thought it fit perfectly. If mods have a real beef with me posting it, I'll happily take it down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Former_KGB
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2014
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Too far.

While listening to NPR the reporter is talking about an attack on a refugee camp and cuts to a audio clip of a man who was there during the attack and says something along the lines of "People where in pieces. Everyone was running so I grabbed my childs hand and ran." immediately my dad cuts in with "WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF THE CHILD?" After he realized what he had actually just said we agreed that sorta joke was off limits.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spike92
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2014
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About the Middle East:

My friend: "an about to reread my middle east paper."

Me: "Iraq-en it's a great paper"

My friend: "lol it's okay. It was sorta rushed."

Me: "Just because it's called Iran doesn't mean you have to hurry through it."

Link: http://imgur.com/Jp8kITM

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Travie6492
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2014
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Pops has always been the sensitive type.

Family was discussing how my brother's ex-girlfriend's grandmother is being transported to RI to be buried after passing away in Florida.

Me: Isn't it sorta weird... you know.. that there could be a dead person flying in a plane en route to Rhode Island.

Dad: No, not really. I'd say the guy she was sitting next to would be the only one a little creeped out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MichaelAnz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2014
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