If a lawyer gets a hip replacement surgery, do they call the procedure a rebuttal?
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👤︎ u/golubeerji
📅︎ Feb 18 2021
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When does a joke become a dad?

When the punch line becomes apparent.

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📅︎ Dec 08 2014
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I was helping my dad move stuff out of his storage unit when I came across a stack of metal rods.

Me: Dad, do you need these?

Dad (with a shit-eating grin): YES! In fact, I was going to put them in the bank. Then it would be a pole vault!

Bonus rebuttal! My husband (not a dad): Look, do you want us to help you or not?

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📅︎ Jul 01 2014
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Looks like I'm ready for parenthood

I'm a part time clerk/grunt worker at my local supermarket. My shift consists of stacking up milk, butter, eggs, cream, anything that comes from an udder. So, to make my existence seem less monotonous, I'll often badger my coworkers with horrid puns. One day,one of them offered me these kind words of encouragement: "If you don't shut up, I'll shove my foot down your throat." My rebuttal: "Is that what people call sole food?"

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📅︎ Oct 14 2013
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Concern over ticks

My wife discovered a tick in our house - likely brought in by the dog after a hike with the family that day. At dinner, it prompted a discussion about the relative risk of Lyme disease and its recent increase in media coverage. My wife made the argument that, while incidents were up, the overall risk is really quite low when you look at actually numbers of incidents. As such, the media coverage is not warranted relative to other safety concerns. My rebuttal:

"Frankly, I think it's about time we had a tick talk"

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📅︎ May 24 2015
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I got my wife, then she got me...

My dad is going to have a colonoscopy in the morning. I told her the news, then followed with...

"I sure hope my dad doesn't make an ass of himself tomorrow." She gives me a courtesy smile. So I try another...

"If he has any questions, I don't think he'll feel too shy to assssk." Nothing.

Then she says, "I hope the doctor has a good rebuttal for all these terrible jokes."

Boom. Roasted.

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📅︎ Apr 15 2015
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If a lawyer gets hip surgery,

Does that count as a rebuttal?

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👤︎ u/NoWeb374
📅︎ Oct 26 2022
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