Before I join a contest, I always make my dog urinate on a photograph of the other contenders.

It gives me a leg up on the competition.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BubzTheDeranged
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
My brother ran up to photograph a cow near a cliff

He said it was 'ledge and dairy.'

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
If you want to make easy money, just take photographs of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 117
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
🚨︎ report
The first photograph of a black hole was released

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DumplingBoiii
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Rare photograph of The Milky Way viewed from Mars
πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cliffter
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I've kept photographs of all my old girlfriends

they're more attractive than the younger ones.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My neighbours, the Razzis, have more photographs hanging from their walls than anyone I’ve ever known.

Thanks to their dad, Papa Razzi.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't anyone get a photograph of a grizzly with shoes or socks on?

They have bear feet

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fantasticmoneill
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend likes to stop by my wind farm and take photographs of my windmills...

He likes to shoot the breeze.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What type of photographs cost money and which ones are free?

Sell-fees and sell-frees

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stor_e_teller
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
He who eats a photograph of his dad...

...will soon be spitting image of his father.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tiekid
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
🚨︎ report
I didn't really like the song Photograph

I want my Nickelback

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BossMight
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
🚨︎ report
My camera was low on storage, so I was only able to photograph a shark attacking a seal.

It’s just one kilo-byte.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Harperhampshirian
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad is a photograph enthusiast

We call him papa-razzi

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AdmiralOverlord
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I hate how all my fairy photographs have really bad quality.....

They're all so pixielated.

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Drondol
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
🚨︎ report
What did Cinderella say while waiting for her photographs to be developed?

"Someday my prints will come."

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fwerkf25
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the first person in a colored photograph say?

Color me impressed

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Icystuff
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when a Jojo fan makes a photograph to capture the moment?

A Diorama

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PuzzledKitty
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you called the fastest photographer alive ?

The Flash

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TexTrap
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I once got beaten up by a photographer

I still get flashbacks

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I once raced against a Photographer in Finland

It was a Photo Finnish

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/the_bad_juju
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Are people born with photographic memories...

....Or do they take a while to develop ?

πŸ‘︎ 161
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a photographic memory.

But I ran out of film in 1999.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
Even though the art thief and the photographer were friends,

Neither had ever taken the other’s picture.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the photographer that always caught people's worst features?

She was a poor-traits artist.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ivegot_back
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What type of image format do lion photographers use?

RAWR

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/InfinitySandwich
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
🚨︎ report
The life of a Family Photographer isn't for me.

Every Day I shoot people, I frame them, and hang them

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I spent all morning at the lake photographing birds. Enjoyable but I didn’t see a thing.

I have no egrets

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Keilly
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I've often wondered, are people with photographic memories born with that ability..

..or does it just take time to develop ?

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
I met a pessimistic photographer the other day...

He wouldn’t stop talking about negatives.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HNipps
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
🚨︎ report
She had a photographic memory,

but never developed it.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Merlin-5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
🚨︎ report
In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed on him.

To be fair, the people who were being photographed did try to warn him.

πŸ‘︎ 234
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Peter Parker lost his photographer job at the Daily Bugle

Now he works in web development.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/riversquid
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
🚨︎ report
What was everyone saying about the photographer who got the prosthetic foot?

They got some new faux-toes

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Fuzzicles
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
What concert costs just 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickelback!

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/5x13
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
🚨︎ report
What's a photographers favourite food?

Cheese

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PenguinFace6921
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I thought I could make a decent living taking photos of the jousting spears that the Renaissance Fair was handing out

Turns out being a free lance photographer isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/excessively314
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing.

He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 107
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/unic0rnism
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to know an unpredictable photographer

he was a real loose Canon

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/growupyall
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the naked photographer who was taking timelapses in the Arctic?

They died from exposure.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/davidtheday
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend the photographer always trims the outer edges of his pictures to be curved so that every edge is equidistant from the center...

He liked making crop circles.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a photographer.

But it didn't develop.

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TallSkinnyPolack
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are photographers so hesitant to get into a relationship?

They're interested in developing one, but can't stop focusing on all the negatives.

πŸ‘︎ 599
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eleventhearlofmar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2018
🚨︎ report
PSA for photographers amid COVID-19 Pandemic /r/photography/comments/f…
πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/malker84
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Today I found out hunters and photographers have a lot in common

They both sit and wait in bushes to shoot animals

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/INP786
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Kid: how are photographers born?

Dad: Well son, when a paparazzi and a mamarazzi love each other very much...

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pixeleric
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Everyone has a photographic memory...

Some people just don’t have film.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the best quality to use when photographing forks?

4K

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Killcams
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
🚨︎ report
If you want to make easy money, just take photographs of salmon dressed in suits, and sell them online.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Are people born with a photographic memory?

Or does it take time to develop?

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YesImThatJ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a photographic memory

It's just not developed yet

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Datanksta
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Are people born with photographic memories...

....Or do they take a while to develop?

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine is making easy money by photographing salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I was born with a photographic mind.

It just took some time to develop.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ryden22
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
You can't not say it

In a freak accident today,a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed on him. To be fair,the people who were being photographed did try to warn him.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/frudedude
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
🚨︎ report

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