Oued Puns

-In French. -Mary, ou sont les enfants?

(It's a classic dad joke that makes a little more sense in my language).

Y

My friends and I are all students attending OU. We were driving by our college, when...

Friend: "Hi school!"

Me: "No Samuel, that's college."

It took 30 seconds of me emphasizing/repeating the wording to get them to realize what I meant.

The kids need shoes so we all get dragged to the store. The Christmas trees (already! for crying ou...) in the kids section has got "homemade" ornaments like these.

http://imgur.com/a/CTEuA

My oldest comes up to me and says "Hey daddy, it's a strawberry tree." and I'm like "Strawberry? come on, a blueberry tree at least." and then he goes "No, a STRAWberry, geddit, STRAWberry."

Yes, son. Wipes tear Yes I do geddit.

French here, so the joke is in french, maybe some will still like it.

Ma copine me dit un soir: "oh merde, ça m'endors !"

J'ai directement répondu: "sinon tu peux faire un truc qui te Liechtenstein, ou qui te Monaco.."

With this song.