Midnight Movies Puns

A few years back, after a series of unsuccessful relationships, I finally met the girl of my dreams. It wasn't your regular love at first sight Hollywood movie script. We met during one of my business trips and shared a table at lunch, but nothing suggested we would be keeping in touch for the coming months. During one of our conversations, I even jokingly mentioned that if we ever got married, I would let her plan out every single detail of our wedding day, since I was not expecting our friendship or even potential relationship to last too long.

Several hundred roses, a dozen dates and one engagement ring later, I somehow found myself on the brink of getting married to the smartest, most beautiful and kind woman I had ever met. Although I had a couple of ideas for our wedding day, being the man of principle I am, I had no intention of breaking the promise I had made to her all that time ago about her having her way if we ever ended up getting married. Luckily for me, she didn't have all that many requests. Pretty much the only thing she had figured out years before we even met was her getting married on December 31st. She had this whole idea of marrying her husband on New Year's Eve and giving a new meaning to the saying "New year, new me".

The big day finally came, and there are no words to describe what I felt watching her walk down the aisle. The ceremony was emotional and heartfelt, and all seemed to be just perfect up to the point where the pastor took his sweet time to deliver his speech. We had planned for the first kiss to come right before the stroke of midnight, but when he was finally done, it was already January 1st. He said I could kiss the bride, but I refused. Needless to say, it completely ruined the wedding and my newlywed wife filed for divorce on the same day.

In hindsight, I probably should have told her that since I am a man of principle, I don't kiss on the first date.